Post # 1
I will try and make a long story short. My dh and have been married for 7 years now…we originally got married at the courthouse and I always dreamed about having an actual wedding (this was the second marriage for both of us) anyway…my dh agreed that next year on our 8th anniversary we would renew our vows…I was super excited not only to get the wedding I wanted, but to be able to marry this man who I love more everyday all over again! I also have always thought writing your own vows are super romantic…we didn’t do that the first time, so I was happy we would be able to do it now.
Well, today something about my past wedding (my first marriage) came up and my dh flipped a little…he said the whole reason he was doing the vow renewal was so that I could forget about my past wedding ( I haven’t thought about it anyway it was over 13 years ago) and have new wedding memories…..UMMMM…what?? Here I’m thinking he loves me so much he wants to marry me again…he’s being romantic etc…Now I’m not sure what I want to do. If he only want to do it because of that reason, that’s now why I want to renew our vows.
So for any of you who are doing your vow renewals…do you each have different reasons why you are doing it? We may not do it now….ugh, I’m confused.
sorry it was longer then I thought it would be…any advice is appreciated..thanks!!
Post # 3
@megan331979: I think your argument got a little carried away if you are going to cancel the vow renewal over it. I would let it blow over and not worry abou it. His comments don’t seem like a big deal to me.
Post # 4
The end result is the same – you’re having a vow renewal. The motivation for each person doesn’t need to be the same.
Post # 5
I think you’re overreacting a little. He wants to create new memories with you. Not sure why that’s bad?
Post # 6
Since what he said sounds like it came out in the middle of an argument, I am going to ignore the tone in which he probably said it and just focus on the words:
It sounds like he doesn’t want your first wedding to be the memory you go back to when you think about a wedding. He wants you to have fresh wedding memories about you and him.
I think it’s rather sweet, and that the way he said it to you is not how it sounds when he thinks about it. I could be wrong of course, but, forgiving the way he said it, it sounds like a very nice reason to renew your vows.
Post # 7
My husband and I are doing our vow renewal for different reasons.
One huge motivation for my husband is remorse over the aspects of the wedding that he ruined. He also wants me to be happy when I think of marrying him. My husband is also being more vocal about the plans this time around; when we got married he left it all up to me. Now my husband is more opinionated which is very touching.
I’m just happy that my husband would like to have a vow renewal. I don’t care what the reasons are.
Post # 8
thanks everyone for your respones….I did have a talk with him about it, and we got everything worked out. We are still on to do it!! 🙂