Post # 1
My husband and I are excited to start a family. I recently decided to go back to school to get my bachelors. But we kind of don’t want to wait. He works full time and I work 2 part time jobs and go to school full time. I have hopefully a year left of college if I’m lucky plus an internship at the end and if I am lucky might get hired there. If not I would like to find a career soon after I graduate. We are both 30 and I always saw myself starting a family by now. We live comfortably and get by and I know we will have a lot of support from our families. We rent a home and my husband has also been wondering if we should wait until we can buy a house, but again that will be at least a year. So my main question is, should we try to get pregnant while I finish up school so by the time I am done with school and having a baby, take a couple months and start job hunting if I need to. Or wait until I am done wth school ( and possibly bought a house) and start trying to have a baby while I am job hunting. I just don’t think an employer will be happy hiring a pregnant person (I know technically they can’t use it against you but might try to find other excuses.) So that is our delema. Any advice would be great. I know going to school and being pregnant will be hard but I have a few pregnant classmates and yes, they say it’s rougher but they manage. Thanks!
Post # 2
My friend got a new job while 8 months pregnant and my work hired a 6 month pregnant woman, so its possible.
I would absolutely wait for a little more stability in my life, or at least until I suspect that I will have had a job for 6 months prior to having the baby. That way you get paid maternity leave and other benefits. I mean, what happens when you have to stop working your part time jobs and then heaven forbid you can’t get another job and you’ve got a baby to support? Can you afford to support a baby and you off of just your husband’s salary?
I don’t think buying a home before a baby is necessary. Babies don’t need nearly as much extra room as an older child.
Post # 3
- Wedding: June 2017 - A Historic Inn
I’d also prefer to wait until things are more stable (start a career). You could even save up some money or make sure you have decent healthcare if you wait until after you start your career. IMO, since you’re renting a home, it won’t really be necessary to buy a house first. Have you made a pro/con list?
Post # 4
I think it really depends on your financial situation. Given that you’re working 2 part-time jobs while working towards a BA/BSc, my assumption is that your husband’s salary isn’t sufficiently high to meet all your financial needs alone. For that reason, I would suggest waiting until you’re in a career-job that provides paid maternity leave and health benefits.
There will be at least a few months where you won’t be able to work and will need time away from school. If you can time the pregnancy so that baby is due in the beginning of summer holidays then you can build in your “mat leave” around you college/internship schedule.
It really comes down to finances (can you afford to take unpaid time away/risk losing your part time jobs?) and scheduling (you’ll need 2-3 months away from school/internship/work to get your feet under you). I know some people who have gone back to work/school within weeks of giving birth but these individuals have special circumstances in which those working were self-employed (so could make their own schedules, bring baby to work, and decide how MUCH work they were going to undertake) and ALL of them had immense family support systems in place. Whether it was in the form of free child care on call (all of them relied on this), help with house upkeep, financial assistance, etc.
It really comes down to the specifics of your situation on whether it’s manageable or not!
Post # 5
If you realistically look at your finances, can you afford to take the unpaid time off–not just to have the baby, but also for the delay in job hunting? My sister timed her baby with her graduation, and it worked out well for them–but if they’d been dependent on her income, it would have been a nightmare. Assuming you’re in the U.S., you usually have to have been working full-time for an employer for a year before you’re eligible for FMLA. There’s no guarantee that would mean any of your maternity leave would be paid, but at least your job would be protected.
Post # 6
proudgeek : TravelingBride31 : mrsmacatak :
12_Elle : Thanks for all your guys replies. One of my pt jobs is a government job that I’ve been at for a while and they will pay maternity leave and all that I could even get fmla if I needed to. They also provide me with good insurance. I plan on staying there until I find a job that actually has to do with where I want to be.
Post # 7
You have to work a certain amount of hours to qualify for FMLA, and possibly for disability as well.
Also make sure you factor in the cost of daycare. We pay $260/week…
Post # 8
Westwood : Yeah, I am not sure entirely how FMLA works but one of my friends who just had a baby and works the same hours got it approved for like 4-6 days a month or something (I know not a lot but smehting) As far as day care, yeah we might do a day or so out of the week maybe but my dad is retired and would like watching over the baby and my husband and I work opposite hours as well I work graves and he works day. My part time day job is only a couple hours (social work, checking up on clients) besides a couple hours for school a week as well if I can’t get online classes. But I try and plan my work and school schedule separate. Also, I work for the airport and they have a day care for us that gives a good discount for employees. I don’t know what it is but I’ve been told it’s worth it…. Yes, I really want to have a baby sooner then later but I am just trying to hear everything to see if it’s something that we can’t handle or have a solution for. My friends that have all had babies can be stay at home moms and haven’t really focused on school and a career so I don’t really have anything to base this off off. Our pros mostly outweigh the cons…. Cons mostly consist of selfishness like less freedom and cost. But when we think about it we spend so much money on random things we don’t NEED but want. And I really believe a baby would bring so much happiness to us.
Post # 9
H3ather86 : I would recommend finishing school first or waiting until you are about to graduate before trying. Having a baby or toddler can be easy or difficult depending on the temperment of the child and parents. Also, pregnancy may or may not be a walk in the park so it’s probably best to be almost finished with school before trying.