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So I know this may be a long shot... but are there any brides on here actually waiting for marriage to have sex? or am i the only one??
just curious...
hope to talk to you if you're out there!
I am too! It always seems like I'm the only one!
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I waited! (And felt like the only one, too). I'm married now (yay!), but both my husband and I were virgins when we got married. So... I have a whopping 8 1/2 months of "experience" now, and 28 years of waiting before that, so if you have any questions at all, ask away! And hang in there -- it's so, so worth it.
Nope - we've both been waiting too. Looking forward to the wedding night and honeymoon....
side note - I went to the gyn for a checkup and to talk about birth control stuff recently and she was literally shocked that I was 28 and still a virgin in this day and age. She was nice about it - but I could really tell she was shocked that I had chosen to wait.
my FH and i are waiting...he's a virgin but I'm not (we like to say i'm born again since i haven't had sex in 4 years)...we're both extremely excited for the wedding day...we're getting married in the morning, the reception will be over at 4pm...we thought about planning something for everyone that night but figured we had lots of practicing to do :) so we decided against it...the funny thing is that i think i'm more nervous about it then he is....
i think it's extremely admirable that people can wait until their married, its a hard thing to do...don't worry, you're not the only one!
My FH and I are not virgins but we have decided to abstain from sex until our wedding in June 2009. It has been difficult but it the end it will be way worth it.
I admire people who have waited until marriage to have sex. I think it makes everything that much more exciting and special. Good for you!
I hope this isn't too TMI to post but just FYI, having sex when you're not used to it can cause you to start your "time of the month" almost immediately. So just be prepared and pack some extra feminine products even if you don't think you'll need them.
We're waiting too, and we're actually waiting for our first kiss as well. That one has been really hard, especially because there are even fewer people like that out there to support you.
WOW!! i forgot that i posted this and forgot to check if there were any responses till this morning!! How incouraging that there are other gals out there just like me!! meelahj, our situation is just like yours... and i feel the same way.. i am pretty sure i am more nervous about it than he is... haha
great to hear from all of you!!
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I'm married now, but we waited too. And we did what meelahj described for our wedding day. The reception was over by 4pm and we were in our hotel room by 5. It was great. So glad we did it that way, because we were sooo tired and passed out by 8!
We are waiting, too! One of us has (a long time ago), and the other hasn't, but I really don't think it is an issue.
I am super excited, but one of my friends waited and said it took her a LONG time to enjoy. I hope that isn't true for me, bc I can't wait for my honeymoon! I also had a Dr freak me out a bit about it. (I no longer see her due to other issues such as repeatedly testing the V* for STDs and never spending time to address my issues, ended up being allergy related, but she told me I should never use c******s when I start...Isn't that scary advice? Maybe I don't know enough, but that would be dangerous advice in a more promiscuous person's hands...) So, I probably just need to talk to my new Dr about any "embarassing" honeymoon questions. (bc there is NO way I'm talking to my mom!!!)
Congrats to all you ladies!
Neither of us were virgins, but we abstained until we were married. It was definitely worth it.
december: i went to a wedding where it was the couple's first kiss ever for both of them. the bride gave a really cute squeal after the kiss. that wedding was the most beautiful moment of my life so far, i think. good luck! :)
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Neither FI or I are, but I just wanted to add in - and I'm sure this is waaaaaayyy TMI, so, sorry! Be careful of UTI's (urinary tract infections). I'm sure your doctors have said something about this, but one of the things I do is to make sure that I always go to the bathroom after sex - it helps get all of the "stuff" out of there. Maybe I'm a freak but I always "clean" myself afterwards because I've had problems with yeast infections. Drinking cranberry juice and eating yogurt also helps with both of these problems.
Good luck, take it slow and enjoy!
Here's a good post for virgins tying the knot:
http://talesfromthecrib.blogspot.com/2006/04/speaking-girl-to-girl-mormon-honeymoon.html
Some of the things mentioned are specific to LDS (Mormon) brides, but most of it is applicable to everybody.
Enjoy!
Fiance and I are both virgins and both waiting for the wedding night....we are pretty nervous though!!!!!
cannotwait:
I think it does take a while to learn how to "fully" enjoy sex, but that doesn't mean that you won't enjoy it at all. It's just that women almost have to figure out the phsyical feeling needed to "take it to the end". Where as guys automaticly "finish". Just look at it this way, it will only get better in the years to come!
Similar to some of the other posters' stories, neither of us are virgins but we both saw the value of enewing our committment to chastity until marriage. So while we've both had sex before, sex with each other will be a brand new and wonderful experience that we're eagerly anticipating.
hi....just wanted to chime in....i'm not a pure virgin but consider myself a reclaimed virgin having been abstaining for the past 2 years. its definitely difficult but we are certain this is whats best for us.
we will also be having a morning ceremony and will no doubt be in our suite by 6pm at the absolute latest. it's funny that i'm nervous. but i am. my nervousness rises and falls depending upon my mood...
Had my first gynecologist appt yesterday... FI was so sweet afterwards, wanted to know if I was ok, if it was scary, am I scared about sex, what can he do to make it easier...Honestly, I'm not really scared. A little nervous, but I love him so much and I trust him to respect me and care for me. And it's such a relief knowing that neither of us have any history to worry about on our wedding night -- just us! (As FI said the other day, have had no S to T the Ds... :))
oh, and thank you melodicsighs. I have heard that first kiss weddings are very sweet to watch, and I hope that our guests will be touched. And I know I sure am going to enjoy it! Been waiting darn long enough! :)
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We're waiting, too. Just two more days!! I'm excited about the sex, but I think I'm almost more excited that we won't have to worry about not having sex. We won't have to think about situations that will tempt us to going too far, or any of that... just total freedom... *sigh*
two days...
fiancee and i not virgins but decided to commit ourselves to waiting until we get married :). it's been 2 years but worth the wait!
Neither of us is a virgin (in fact, he has a daughter). But we've agreed to wait until our wedding (tentatively set for April or June 2009 - we're waiting for a response from the ceremony location).
We actually were together for 5 years, broke up and are now back together, and we haven't done anything this 2nd time around. I'm glad though, because I see that he has enough respect for me to wait as long as it takes!
Wow... I'm glad this was posted. I am not a virgin and am not waiting, but I think it's really great there are so manypeople who are. I have a male friend who is waiting (he is 28).. I showed him this bored and it gave him hope :)
Congratulations to you all. I think waiting makes it more special. :)
We're both waiting. We've been together for 5 years, and we're still really happy with our decision. I have a friend who got married in August and both were virgins. She assured me they had lots of sex on the honeymoon--so it is possible to enjoy it right away! I'm really proud of us for sticking to our committment, but I understand it's not the right choice for everyone. When I told my Dr. (as a sophomore in college) that I was still a virgin, she hugged me! It was quite funny, actually...
I think I already commented on another question similar to this, but both the Mr and I waited until our wedding night. We have the rest of our lives to figure out how to "master" it all, and when we're old & gray we'll look back and laugh at how young and innocent we were. I also want to be able to look at my kids' faces and tell them that it is very possible and worth the wait.
We're waiting! It's not easy all the time, but its easier knowing that so many of you are waiting too. :)
I'm glad to see there are so many others! We too are waiting, and after 7 years there's much anticipation. I tease my fiance by telling him that we've waited this long so I don't see what the big deal would be in waiting awhile longer after the wedding; he used to laugh, but then I think he started thinking I was serious and the laughing subsided and now he kind of half-smiles! Silly boy- less than 6 months to go!
It's so wonderful to know that so many take this seriously. It's a great thing to wait! Being disciplined definitely has its rewards.
My fiance and I are waiting until our wedding night. Also, just yesterday we decided that kissing is impure to us, so we are now just kissing each other on the check when we say goodnight etc. Less than 3 months left! Yay!
We are waiting too. It's been 3+ years for him and 8, yes, 8 for me. We get married in 17 days!!! I'm so glad that we have waited, not that it has been easy.
I know I've chimed in before, but now that I am married - thought I'd just give a little heads up.
As a little background, my husband and I had been intimate, but decided about a year and a half ago that we would wait until marriage. So, in the beginning of our relationship we had a connection on ALL levels. Then, once we decided to wait, we still had a deep emotional connection, but the physicality had vanished. We actually lived together the entire time, so essentially, we were roommates sharing a bed. Sure, there were tempting times, but deep down we both knew that if we were to slip, the guilt would not be worth it to us.
HOWEVER, on our wedding night last Saturday & up until now, it's been very difficult "getting back into it" if you know what I mean. It's almost like we have to re-learn the feelings that we had been smothering for quite some time. Obviously it's going to be a process, but I had just assumed we would be amazing from day one and not look back. Maybe some people are (lucky!!) but I'm having a tough time with it. Anybody that has waited and is now married have these feelings? I love my husband dearly and am very attracted to him, however we lived a certain way for so long that it's hard for me to simply turn the switch back on..
we're waiting! I'm so excited for the wedding night, it's taking over my excitement for the wedding. We talk about it and I just cannot wait to learn everything with only him.
While we aren't virgins (and regret that), we decided that we shouldn't have sex with each other until marriage as well. :) You are totally not alone!
futuregrado: It takes time to gain back that intimacy once you stopped, especially since you were both living with each other and sleeping in the same bed, I think that makes it even harder.
I heard that especially for women, once you have had sex, the less you do have some the less you want some. Try getting away somewhere, do something different you never did, add romance to it.
I've only had sex with my husband, but we did it before we got married. I'm glad I did because personally it's important to me to know that we were a match on that aspect too. The physical connection in a relationship is an important one too.
We were appart several times (long distance) and it was always a bit hard to get back to it, but you have to be patient and trust yourself.
The first time wasn't all that great, but since then we both learned what we like and there has been steady improvement.
I respect the choice to wait, just don't expect it to be the most amazing night though, especially if it's the first time for both of us. It's something you have to learn, and don't hesiatate to be honest with one and other and tell him/her what you like.
We're waiting. Both of us are virgins. Knowing that we will have this special connection between only us, and that won't be shared with ANYONE else is so exciting! I don't know how many times I've had people laugh in disbelief when I've told them we're both waiting.
I am so glad to see how many people have the ability to wait till marriage. I wish I was able to obstain that long:( Sex is something so magical and there is no better day than your wedding day for your first time.
We're waiting too...and sometimes it feels like that day will never come! We are SO excited...159 days to go (but who's counting?!?)!!!
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