waiting a long time….any other ladies out there to provide comfort?

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
450 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

I went through exactly what your going through and definitely felt heartbroken over it. I ended up almost “forcing” an engagement shortly after our 6 year anniversary but I really don’t recommend that (see here http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/how-do-i-forgive-fi-for-not-giving-me-a-proper-proposal#axzz2toueNjA5). I regret it now…

He has already expressed that he wants to spend the rest of his life with you. Just try to be patient. By the sounds of it, you won’t have to wait too much longer 🙂

Post # 4
2355 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

8 years here and just getting engaged now.

About 4 years ago, I was ready, and he wasn’t. His reason wasn’t a vague feeling. It was specific, financial, and something he wanted us to accomplish before marriage. I didn’t ask for a timeline because it wasn’t a time-based thing.

I was BSC for a few months. I had to choose what I wanted most and what I could accept. Once I chose, the BSC faded. I wasn’t staying because I was waiting. I chose to stay because I wanted to be with him with or without marriage. I dropped the subject. No hints, no jokes, no more talk.

At the end of 2012, SO began bringing up marriage. He surprised me by taking me ring shopping in 2013. We chose the ring, the goal he had set 4 years ago finally happened, and the ring was purchased a few weeks ago, and we’re getting married this September or next September depending on finances. The ring is hidden, and I’m still waiting on a proposal, but everything has finally come together.

The point of my story is that plenty of people on this site date for several years. Every couple has their own pace. As for your situation, you need to think long and hard about what you want. Your SO may very well propose to you before the end of the year, or he may never do it. He may be the right one or he may not. He told you he’s not ready. Hear what he’s saying and choose.

Post # 5
139 posts
Blushing bee

I’ve been with my bf for 7 years, we have been living together for over 3 years and we both finished with college  over 3 years ago. My bf says he isn’t ready but he wants it one day. But this last few weeks he has been mentioning it in passing. So Im taking this as a good sign 🙂 I think it is just a case of deciding if marriage is what you want from the relationship. 

I’m here if you ever want a chat 🙂 

Post # 6
1646 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I waited not always patiently for 11.5 years. Living together for 4 years. We’ll be getting married one month before our 13 year dating anniversary!

Post # 7
132 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I’ve been with my SO for 7 years this last Valentines, and we just picked out a ring last November.

It’s sooooo hard to wait, but if they’re worth it, it’s worth it!

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