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Delurking....
My partner and I have been together for three years, I'm 25 and he is almost 28. I'm getting my Masters in Social Work and he is in med. school. We're a pretty non-traditional, feminist/sociall conscious oriented couple, so the "waiting for a ring" thing doesn't really apply to me. We've discussed marriage, and agreed that it is something we both want, and agreed that we both want a wedding. Mostly we just want a giant, fun and beautiful party for all our friends and family! We're planning on a wedding in two years-ish. We want to be equally involved in planning, but his schedule doesn't really allow for that now. After lots of conversations, we decided that when he is ready to get married in one year, he shoud let me know.
In the mean time, I'm day dreaming about hosting this fabulous party!
I'm in Vermont and we will have the wedding at a rural barn, somewhere around here.
I'm kind of a pain in the butt about the notion that the "personal is political" and so everything related to the wedding has been pretty heavily deconstructed in my brain. I really like A Practical Wedding for this reason, and would like to meet other like-minded people, who are finding a balance between wanting the wedding party but not wanting to embrace the wedding industrial complex!
Here it goes..
I am 23 years old and graduated college 3 years ago, since that time I've been working on building my career and recently got a promotion to a position that I am truly happy with. My SO (27) and my met at his work, I was a client of his. We've recently purchased and moved in to a home together and we are happily adjusting to life under the same roof which is fun and not without it's challenges.
I am excited to finally be out of the "bee closet" and looking forward to getting to know (and hopefully soon congratulate) my fellow waiting bees.
Anyone else think that Alicia Keys' - Unthinkable is the waiting be anthem? lol
Ok, I'll come out of hiding too... :-)
I'm 34 (yikes, I just had a birthday and that's the first time I've "said" it),. and my SO is 43. We met while performing in a play together (we are both actors in LA), so we've known each other for a while, but we've only been together a few months. We didn't want to date while the show was still running, and the show was very successful and kept getting extended, so...we just kept waiting. It was sweet, really. We both just wanted to do it right. Start out on the right path, I think.
And it's been great! He is just the sweetest man alive. He has such a good heart. We're looking at houses (to rent, the LA housing market is a nightmare right now) to move in together in the fall, and next weekend, we're going back east so he can meet my dad and I can meet his siblings (his parents are deceased).
He and I talk about "our wedding" and actually, last weekend, we had a pretty serious talk about it. I used to be a wedding planner, so I wanted to find out what he envisioned for our wedding. Some of it was amazingly sweet and romantic...and some of it was hilarious.
I've just started a blog about all this. My SO doesn't know about it...yet. I'll let him read it, eventually. :-)
http://thatbridesgotmoxie.wordpress.com/
Anyway, I know what ring I want, and so does my best friend. And she's made it clear to him that she wants "in" on the shopping. (Since I did that with her husband when he bought her ring.) I'm kinda curious to see what he will come up with on his own, though. He's a super thoughtful gift-giver, so I imagine this will be no different. At least, in the thoughtful category.
So...that's it, I guess. It's been great reading all your posts, bees! This is a wonderful community of women!
xo
Ms. MoxieMonkey
P.S - I should admit that I've already started some DIY projects, including a vintage brooch bouquet and save the dates. I'm gonna file this little tidbit under "crazy". LOL.
Hi everyone! Figured I'd introduce myself as well. Just discovered this board a few days ago and I am incredibly relieved that I am not the only one out there going crazy that her boyfriend will not get his stuff together and just propose already!
I am 25 years old and have been with my boyfriend for 1 year and 10 months. He is 39, although you'd never guess it if you saw him. We moved in together after dating for 3 months and things have been going great, especially in the past 6 months. We had a few hurdles to overcome, mainly getting better at communication, and we have progressed a lot in our relationship and can resolve arguments 1000% better now. We also work together so we see each other and spend more time together than most couples probably do. Surprisingly enough, we have yet to get sick of one another.
I've brought up the marriage topic before (a few times), so he knows that I want to commit and be with him. I could tell that he was kind of uncomfortable with the topic like most guys can be, so the conversations were quite brief. I wanted him to propose last year, but he was completely against that (understandable I guess, since we hadn't been together that long). He told me that he had always planned to date someone for at least 3-4 years before even considering proposing, and one of his past relationships was almost 5 years long and he never proposed to her. But he also told me that he knew he was getting a lot older so he may have to throw the 3-4 years timeline out the window. He wanted me to work on my tendency to overreact to small things and cause arguments as well before he considered committing.
Long story short, we tried a few sessions of couples counseling and then I did a few counseling sessions on my own and it helped tremendously and he has seen the difference in me and in us. A few months ago I brought this up and asked that since I had changed, how much longer did he think it would take for us to take the next step??? He told me that he supposed he had to take my feelings into account (that I was ready to get engaged/married) and that he tended to procrastinate on everything so he would have to try and get over that.
I used to joke about him buying a ring every now and then and he's made comments that suggest that he will propose soon (but I worry I'm just reading too much into it). I've since tried to stop making comments about it because (1) I want him to think he'll surprise me, (2) I don't want to seem like I'm nagging, and (3) I'm going to try going the way of Mr. Bee's 3 step plan. However, if my man doesn't propose by the beginning of this October, I have to wait until at least 2012 to get married (and I don't want to)! Our job makes us pick all vacation leave for the following year during every October. It's a pain!
I'm so frustrated with waiting nonetheless because I just want my life to move forward. I feel like I am stuck on this endless plateau. However, I feel for all of you ladies that have been with your men for much longer than I. I can't even imagine how crazy I would be driving myself if I was with my boyfriend for 5 years or so and still had no ring! Props to those of you in that position and still able to deal with it, lol. 
Glad to be joining the community! ~purplebee
P.S. To Ms. MoxieMonkey: I'm with you in the "crazy" category for starting DIY projects! You're not alone! 
ms moxie-where did you start up your blog? i would really like to do this to keep track of all my wedding plans. also, is it free? :)
@CantWaitToBeWed: Yup - totally free. I originally started one on tumblr.com, but I found it difficult to navigate, so I moved it over to www.wordpress.com
MUCH easier to figure out, for a newbie blogger such as myself. They have options where you pay - to get more features, but I'm happy with my simple blog for now.
Happy Blogging!!
I guess I'm delurking, too. I've been haunting Weddingbee for..oh...at least a year now. This is the first point I've really felt I had anything to *say* about it all.
BF and I have been together for 4 years and 4 months. We're both 23, and we met a few months into our freshman year of college through mutual friends at the dining hall. We quickly became inseparable and had our first 'official' date about 3 weeks after meeting.
We moved in together about 2 years ago, in an apartment shared with other friends. We loved it, but were very, very excited to move to a place of our own last month. He's known that I'm ready for the next step for almost a year now, and I've just been waiting on him to catch up to me. Lately, he's been seeming readier and readier - two weeks ago he suggested we go to a jewelry store and look at rings together, and after that he asked that I email him the relevent details so that he can be sure he's getting me what I want without spoiling the surprise.
On fathers' day we watched a bunch of my family's old home movies with my dad and on the way home, we wound up discussing cars - but specifically, what kind of car he should buy in a few years to replace his current car. I kept telling him that he could buy whatever he wanted, that I would make suggestions but not impose my practical nature on him, and he kept reminding me that this is the car that would have to weather family trips with one or two small children... I don't think I've ever loved him more than hearing him completely ignore his own desire for a sporty car in order to plan for our future family.
At this point, we've tentatively agreed that we'll probably get married in the fall of 2012, and we're both on-board for a long (~2 years) engagement...which means I'm getting antsy now. He told me after we looked at rings that I had to do my best at keeping quiet about rings, engagement, and proposals so that I won't accidentally spoil his surprise for me. This makes total sense, as he's not very good at keeping surprises - I've never received a birthday or christmas present from him on the date, they've always been at least 2-3 weeks early (as soon as he got them) 'cause he couldn't wait to give them to me.
I had been doing my best to put thoughts of rings and proposals out of my mind, but it got more challenging as the other day, his mom (who would totally be in on it, if scheming were afoot) told us that she would have to give up her usual sunday dinner with us sometime soon to visit Atlantic City with her boyfriend, as he was receiving a free room. She suggested that we take the day to check out a nice restuarant she heard of - we could get all fancied up and have some time to ourselves for a change. This all seems perfectly normal, except that their free rooms in AC are usually on weeknights, not weekends...sooo of course I'm reading way too much into this. I can't help but feel that a proposal is imminent, but I'm trying to keep my engagement-and-wedding-crazy side underwraps for the sake of the people around me.
So please, fellow waiting bees, help me keep my mind of my own potentially imminent proposal!
@Ms. MoxieMonkey: I may not be guilty of starting DIY projects before the proposal, but I've certainly dreamed up wayyyy more than I could even tackle. I may even have picked up the supplies to make an invitation mock-up over 2 years ago....but you didn't hear it from me.
@ardnek: HILARIOUS!! I love it!!
I, too, am trying to keep my crazy-planner side under wraps for right now. The only person that knows (aside from the bees!) is my best friend/future maid of honor. Mostly, becasue she's crafty. So when I say "let's make STD's out of this vintage postcard" or "I want to make a brooch bouquet", she doesn't look at me like I'm nuts.
Which I am, clearly.
:-)
@Ms. MoxieMonkey: I don't think it's crazy...what's crazy is that a year or two ago, I daydreamed up the perfect wedding (in my mind, anyway). All the way down to looking up venue fees at the chapel at the college where he and I met and trying to figure out an appropriately near and sentimental reception venue. I recently learned that he told his mom about these ideas, and she thinks it's a fantastic idea...so maybe I'll get my daydreamed wedding after all.
I refuse to let myself *actually begin work* on any projects until I'm *actually engaged*, but I've worked on sketches and daydreamed up all the construction details of my dress (which I plan to make with my mom). So yeah, I might be a little crazy.
Hey there! This board is sort of a lifesaver because getting engaged is on my mind constantly and I'm so relieved to know I am not the only one.
I'm 25 (almost 26). I've been with my bf for 4 years. We moved in together after 1 year, and last summer, I moved with him after graduation from grad school (we met in grad school) to New york City. I told him before I moved to be with him that there better be a ring in my future! Clearly I was not specific enough about a timeline because a year later, we're playing house but he hasn't put a ring on it yet. One major obstacle is that I can not find a job (thank you economy-you suck), and although he does very well, it's hard to expect him to pay all our bills and save for a ring (and a wedding) at the same time. And yes- I love him dearly but I would still like some bling on my finger. That being said, I'm as patient with him as I can be. But all of my friends, including those who started dating after we were already living together, are getting engaged and married. I'm not the type of girl who hints or e-mails him pictures of rings. I'd really like him to come to the conclusion on his own timeline, but its really hard.
Last summer before I moved, my grandfather started crying asking me when I am getting married because he isn't well and it means SO much for him to be there since I am their oldest granddaughter and the first girl in his family in 63 years. Obviously, I want to get married for our own reasons but it means a lot to me to have my grandparents there and they literally aren't getting any younger. But I can't really mention this to him without sounding like I am pressuring him.
I honestly never even thought about us getting married until after we graduated from grad school. I knew it was never even in the cards until after graduation. But we graduated a year ago, he has a steady career and I know I will have a job eventually, so I'd really like to get the show on the road. I am really far away from my family and friends, so I made a big sacrifice to be with him. I'd really like to think that it was worth it and that it is leading somewhere.
Whew! that felt good to get off my chest.
Hi everyone. I'm 23 and live in NC. I moved here with my BF from OH almost 2 years ago. We have been together 3 1/2 years. We met through friends and have been together ever since! I work in the medical field, which I love. Outside of work I like to hang out with friends, go to the beach, play with my puppy, work out, of course spend time with the man. That's me in a nutshell =)
Hi Everyone!
I've been creepin' on the bee for a while now, but this is a thread I can actually contribute too! :) I am 24 years old and have BA in International Business. I was born and raised in Chicago, but live in Peoria, Il and work at the world's largest heavy construction machinery company (Think big yellow). BF is 23 and works for a technology firm as a buyer. We met the summer before my Jr. year and his Soph. year and have been together ever since. After I graduated I bought a house and we moved in together. Best decison ever! We have been having so much fun fixing up our house and getting to know each other even more. We have since adopted a kitten and a boston terrier both of which we adore.
As far as wedding planning... I have been obsessing over the wedding since college.. haha. We have been ring shopping and he has dropped hints that the proposal will come by my birthday (in September). I'm OK with waiting because I don't want him to go into debt to buy my ring. I would rather wait until he feels comfortable buying me the "dream ring".
Can't wait to post about the wedding for REAL!!! :-D
So good to know that I’m not alone! I’m 33 and I live in the Atlanta area. We've been together for just 7 months, but we know it's right. We have talked about it and actually went and looked at some rings last week. So exciting! I’ve never done that before. I know it probably won’t happen for a couple of months. But I am going crazy! I’m ready to start planning, but I know I can’t. But I have been researching and thinking of ideas for the event.
Hi Ladies :)
It's great to see so many of us in similar situations! I'm 26, and my boyfriend and I have been together for about 4 1/2 years. We live together in South Carolina and things are going fabulously. We have been ring shopping together and he knows the exact ring that I love, so I'm hoping it won't be too long now!
Hello fellow Bees in waiting!
I have been an on-again-off-again lurker here on WB and finally decided to post (ok, VENT, actually) -- gotta love being able to get all this off my chest anonymously! Translation: Being able to ruminate without getting my mother started on yet another depressing convo about how excited she will be to help (bless her heart!) or how I should have my reception site picked out by the time we get engaged!! =:-0
I am a 24 year old grad student who met my Chico in college. We've been together over 5 years now. With our shared love and values, Chico and I know that marriage is definitely in our future plans... the question has always been when it will all come together for us. Frankly, I hadn't thought twice about the future for the first 4 years or more... until this past year, as it seems that more and more of our friends met someone... got engaged... then set a date/got married, while we're still in a holding pattern! He's been quite happy to talk about future plans like traveling, pets, kids' college funds (more long-term stuff), while avoiding more immediate plans (ie-engagement/wedding) like the plague!
To be fair, Chico's life has been in a state of transition, as he recently moved back to where I'm at school (!!!long distance was LAME!!!) and then went back to school himself. So I have been more than happy to force myself to chill out until he graduates at the end of this year and starts making money again! Based on some of our past conversations, I assume (or hope!) that things with us will start moving forward as soon as Chico gets a full-time job and starts feeling financially secure. However, during a random discussion tonight I was really disappointed to hear him list off his plans for his first couple paychecks: video console, music amp, computer... he even mentioned talking to a dog breeder to pick out a puppy... but seemed oblivious that I was secretly saying, "Yes, fine, ok, cool, AND.... WHAT ABOUT MY RING!?!?!??!"
::Sigh:: Just needing to find a little patience right now. I'm definitely planning to take Mr. Bee's advice about investing in myself again for some mental peace/physical rejuvention in the meantime! :-)
Hi everyone!!
I am a long, long, long time lurker and figured now is a good time to come out of the woodwork and introduce myself. I can't believe how many other bees are in the same boat as me.
Anyways... about us!! I'm 24 and he's 28. We've been together for 5 years (today is our anniversary!!) and we met while in undergrad. I have had the wedding itch for about a year now though and have been patiently waiting, and it seems that my SO is finally coming around.
We've gone ring shopping and he's even talked to my parents (my mom let that one slip!) so now I'm just waiting, waiting, waiting. I'm a crazy planner and a bit of a control freak so I'm constantly stalking this board to get new ideas. I don't want to do any real planning until I'm engaged, so right now I'm just gathering ideas in my head. All I can get out of him is that the ring will be here before the end of the summer.... so I am holding my breath for the next few months wondering when it will happen.
We live in NYC right now, but we have talked about an upstate wedding because I grew up there and so much of my family is there. I'm worried about trying to plan a wedding 3 hours away from where I live, but it's so much cheaper and I know I will have so much support from my family upstate... I think we can pull it off!
Thanks for reading... I look forward to getting to know everyone here and to share ideas!!
Hi!! I'm waiting! We've been dating for a little under 2 years. We just moved in together, so that's a huge step in the right direction. No, he doesn't have a ring, and I know this because I know my anal, overly prepared, have to do everything right boyfriend. He wouldn't buy a ring w/o finding out my style first (thank God!). As far as "wedding planning" I really haven't done anything except look at dress styles I like and colors I like. Oh, I also looked on-line at resorts in the bahamas just to get a pricing idea if we decided to elope or do a destination wedding. :) :)
I'm 19, FH is 23. He works for Aflac. I am just waiting on my time to come. Everyone is getting engaged that said they were "taking it slow" a year ago. We've been together about 2 years officially, but we've been dating for 2 and a half. I've already got money saved up for his wedding band (which is more expensive than my ring & band combined) but he is still taking things so slow, and saying he wants to save his money and get engaged around next April with a summer wedding of the same year.
Not going to happen, since I've told him numerous times I need atleast 8 months, hopefully 11 or 12. I don't know what his deal is! But until then...I'm waiting!
I'm so glad this board/post exists...! I've been lurking for a little bit, but finally ready to post. I swear this site is the only thing keeping me from nagging my poor BF to death hehe.
I'm 23 (24 in less than a month) and the BF is 26. We met through a mutual friend in college and have been going strong for four solid years. I always laugh when I think back to when we first started dating. On my 20th birthday one of my best friends asked me if I loved him and I laughed and went pffft....too soon to tell. It had only been 2 months at that point. I guess she could kind of tell, though :)
We've been talking about getting engaged/married pretty frequently over the past few months, and we've decided to get engaged within the next year. It seems kind of silly to me to pick when you're getting engaged, but I'm definitely not the proposal type (I'm weird, but I'd rather us mutually decide to make things official) - so I was kind of glad he was willing to give me a horizon to run toward haha.
I recently finished my MA and the BF is now in his second year of PhD (and wants to finish his MA thesis, too, before we hightail into planning mode). I respect his timeline, but I am also SO impatient! I keep telling myself it gives him more time to save up for the ring! I think I kind of cajoled him into setting spring of 2011 as our engagement frame...but deep down I hope he knows I would love some bling on that finger the day after he submits his big paper hahaha. Realistically, I'd love to begin my formal planning (because who of us here has NOT ogled wedding mags and theknot.com???) with him sooner rather than later. Especially since I'm more of a romantic-run-to-the-courthouse-and-make-it-official kind of gal and he's all about the "pomp and pageantry" of weddings (that is a quote from him, I kid you not), I think I will need all the time I can get to deal with my future groomzilla!
Glad we are all able to keep each other company; can't wait to celebrate the waiting bee graduates, too!
Hi! I'm 21 (SO is 22), we are both graduating college in may 2011. We meet orientation week freshman year have been dating for almost 3 years. Wedding date has been set for Monday, December 12, 2011 (Dec 12 is my parents (married 23yrs), grandparents (married 51yrs) and great-grand parents (were married 76yrs) wedding anniversary so the date has a lot of sentimental value). My SO has hinted that the engagement will happen around September or October this year! So anxiously waiting!
We live in Puerto Rico, so ours will be like a Destination Wedding but with tons of people. A traditional Catholic Ceremony (w/o Mass) followed by a Reception for about 150 guests since we have huge families.
My Grandma was in the wedding business,so I kinda of grew up around tulle, roses and caterers. I love everything about puffy elegant weddings, but personally I'm more of a DIY laidback wedding kind of girl. So lets see how I manage to pull off a Non-formal, Relaxed, Jeweled Tone Peacock wedding for 150 guests. I can't wait to start working on everything!
Alrighty, I think I've commented enough on threads to finally introduce myself. (I'm usually wordy on the threads so I'll try to be concise here!)
I'm a Texas girl, just turned 28 (SO is 32) - we've been together for a while... over 3 years. In that time we graduated from grad school (Sociology for me/ Finance for him). Can you ask for two people with brains that are oriented in completely different ways? I think not! We gave up our college town and found jobs in the big city. I took a job with a Non-profit (in the Marriage Education Dept. no less!!! -- not counseling though) and he's a bean counter ;) I'd like to say we've seen it all in our time together - and have gone through hell to come back only stronger, so now I'm just waiting! And, you know, stalking the Bee to come up with amazing ideas for when it finally happens!
It's so great to have a group of gals who understand!
Well, I've been lurking here for a few days and I am loving the vibe here and how sweet everyone is, so I decided to jump in! I am 24, soon to be 25, and born and raised north of San Francisco. SO is 27 and we’ve been together for 4 ½ years, living together for 2 years, and we got a puppy together in October. We've known that we were heading toward marriage since we moved in together but we’ve been talking seriously about it since early this year and a few months ago he told me he wants to get married next summer (!). Sometime in May we decided to look at rings together and get an idea of what we both liked and what looked good on my hand. I know that at this point he is at least in the process of finding the right one, he made a joking comment the other day about what a pain it is to find the style I liked and then told me not to worry because he’s got it taken care of. I know the proposal is coming sometime this summer because he mentioned that he knows it takes a year to plan a wedding So I’m patiently waiting and just living life in the meantime. I have been cruising around wedding websites for a couple months and have some bookmarked and some thoughts on wedding ideas, but no actual plans; I'm trying not to get too ahead of myself!
Other than that, I enjoy hanging out with our dog, hiking, camping, trying new places to eat…I recently joined a new gym and for the first time EVER, I can say that I enjoy working out! We’ll see how long it lasts, but it’s pretty exciting. I’m excited to be a part of this community and I know it’s going to be incredibly helpful when it comes time to plan the wedding!
@PopRox My SO and I could probably give you a run for your money as far as having totally different fields...computer science for him and sociology for me! We're basically opposite ends of the spectrum; he's math/science and I'm art/English.
But exciting to see another sociologist around these parts! :-) Also your job sounds super interesting - hopefully I'll be able to find something that interesting when I enter the job market in December!
Hi Ladies,
Well, I am Miss Orchard, am 26 years old, and from Boston (hellooo Red Sox!) After receiving two degrees and working in the "real world" for a while, I decided to return to school for my nursing degree (which, as it turns out, what was I actually wanted to do.) My boyfriend is a Project Manager (computer stuff) and we have been together for a bit over 4 years.
We met when I was right out of college and had gone back to my previous job. The rest is history!
Despite having been together for a while, we are just now planning to move in with each other this coming September. I had a hard time giving up my roomate lifestyle as I LOVE living with my friends!
Anyways, we have gone ring shopping and he definately knows what I want (cushion cut halo on a platinum micro pave band). I think we will be engaged before the end of the year but am not sure and certainly not pushing it - my time will come. Until then, I'll just enjoy our time together! I'm a planner by nature so I've found myself lurking around wedding websites and looking into venues. I guess my goal now is to try and sort out what I like and what I can do myself to save money as we will likely be paying the majority of our wedding costs - I figure it can't hurt to get a leg up on planning!
See you around The Hive, girls!
Hey y'all...
I've been lurking, but finally decided to "jump in" I'm not yet engaged, but my BF (he's 28) of 1.5 years and I (I'm 28, turning 29 next week) are planning for a wedding 11.11.11 and I am so excited!! I’m getting a little neurotic, we’ve discuss some aspect of the wedding/reception for the past month and he’s been asking really specific questions, but my mother and best friend know what I want (emailed them my favs) and when the time comes he’ll get the “info”, if he already hasn’t-LOL! I'm a DIY-er at heart and because of grad school debt, we're trying to minimize our costs...so, they'll be a LOT of projects over the next year and a half!!
We met at a holiday cocktail party in DC (well, Arlington) in December 2008. My close friend from elementary hosted the party...she attended law school with my now BF's then roommate (confusing?). The roomie brought my BF and a few other friends to help even out the female-male ratio. From the time he walked in, we caught each other's eyes. I thought he was extremely cute and we started a great convo almost immediately. I was fairly new to the area and I thought I'd "blow" him away when I told him that I was an attorney (kinda cocky now that I think about it) and was even more surprised and knocked down to size when he told me that he was also an attorney :D
Through the night we discovered that we had so much more in common, including our common roots in the south (me from NC and him being from TN), sports, and music (particularly “dirty south” rap, LOL). At the end of the night he asked if could he call me and I gave him my number…but, I really didn't expect much.
The next day, I went to church and called my mom on my way home (as usual) and told her about the service, but also about the nice guy I met the night before and almost as soon as we began talking about "him", HE CALLED!! I quickly got off of the phone with my mom (she insisted) and we made plans to WATCH FOOTBALL with his friends!! I was pleasantly surprised because he actually paid attention to what we discussed and I'm glad he chose a relaxing atmosphere to hang out. We ended up having a GREAT TIME and over the next week we went on dates each night and have been together since then.
I can't explain how blessed I feel to know him, I’ve become a better person and we’ve grown together spiritually which is so important to us both! I truly believe that we were meant to be together, we met on a fateful December night, but had actually been at some of the same events since high school and never ran into each other...so, it would have eventually happened :D
Hi Bee's! I'm coming out of hiding after finding Weddingbee about 3 weeks ago, and I am loving all of the stories, advice, pictures, etc. Now...I'll share a little bit about myself and the BF!
I am 26 (almost 27) and I live on Long Island. I work as a Records Technician, but am aspiring to be a photographer. I met K in 2006 through a mutual friend, who I've known since we were babies. When my friend and I were little, our dad's used to take us camping upstate. I eventually moved to Florida with my family and lost touch with this friend. After unexpectedly losing my father in 2003, my family moved back to NY. I started speaking to my friend again, and she begged me for two years to come camping at our old place...a tradition that she kept up with her friends. I always said no, but after going through a rough patch in '06, I finally said "what the heck?"
I met K a few times earlier that year, and always thought he was cute, but it wasn't until that camping trip that I realized how incredible he was. We flirted all weekend, and it was obvious that there was an attraction. On our last night upstate, it poured and our tent flooded, but K and I stayed up all night talking, even while laying on soggy pillows! At one point, he put his arm around me and snuggled with me. It was amazing and I didn't care about the leaky tent after that! Pretty much from then on, we've been inseperable! We moved in together after six months and despite some small bumps in the road, things are wonderful! He constantly makes me laugh, he's loving and generous and a very hard worker! We really balance each other out and I feel so lucky to have him in my life! After meeting the way we did, I always say my dad had a hand in getting us together, from heaven. Now if he could just nudge K into proposing! Thanks Dad! ; )
Good morning Bees!
I've been lurking around the Wedding Bee boards for about a month now, primarily on Waiting. I'm 34, a nursing student about to start my final year of school and mom to a 12 year old boy. My SO is 32 and an IT contractor who does server support for a medical supplies company. We've been together for 4.5 years. It's been a huge relief to find other women who are wondering what the heck he is waiting for!
If he ever does ask, I'm going to be an Encore Bride. SO and I were introduced by a mutual friend when I was married. I liked him a lot, thought he was incredibly handsome, sweet, funny and in all truth developed a crush on him. I kept that little tidbit to myself of course! Things had been rough in my marriage (physical and emotional abuse) and we separated and filed for divorce in December of 2005. I was pulling myself back together and trying to get on with my life in March of 2006 when I went to dinner with a group of friends, with my SO being included in the group. I learned later that our mutual friend had set this up to get SO and myself in the same place at the same time. Dinner with the group turned into us having coffee after alone and then a club for a drink. Somewhere in there he kissed me for the first time and just...wow. Major chemistry! We had dinner again two days later and next thing I knew, we were dating exclusively and I had a boyfriend. We moved in together last May and it's been wonderful. We have ups and downs like every couple but he has shown me what a good, solid, loving relationship really looks like and he says that I've shown him that he's wrong to have such negative views about marriage.
Bees, this is breaking my heart. He is IT for me. We've been talking about marriage on and off for about 6 months now. I've been very clear about the fact that I want to marry him. I'm about to start my last year in nursing school and I've also been very clear about the fact that I don't even want to get married until I've got my RN and can contribute financially to our marriage. He's said that there isn't anyone else and that I'm IT for him, too. He's said that he wants to marry me. He's said that we'll be married within two years. But no ring, no proposal, just talk and I'm all talked out.
Here's the other thing - I want HIM. I've told him before I'd marry him at City Hall in jeans and a t-shirt. Which is not to say I wouldn't really like the ring, the dress and the whole enchilada but I want a solid, strong marriage more. So like many of you I'm waiting. And waiting some more. And wondering if despite having a wonderful relationship if I need to move on with my life. And so on. The only glimmer of hope on the horizon currently is the fact that we're going on vacation to Florida over my birthday. I'm trying not to build it up in my head to this huge thing but I'm losing that battle pretty badly.
Just wanted to say thanks for reading this and it's a huge relief to finally be able to get some of this out.
Have a great day Bees!
Hi Bees!
I only just started lurking recently, but I was previously on The Knot and didn't really appreciate the snarkiness there so I am totally relieved to have found this board!
A little info.. I'm 22 and SO is 23. We are both only starting our undergrad studies this fall as we are both travelers and took a lot of time after high school to be young and free. So now I will be majoring in English and he will be starting a Renewable Resource Management program. We have been together for 2.5 years, and have known each other for 4 years. We met through a mutual friend (one of my best friends) at a party in July 2006, but I was seeing someone at the time. Long story short, it took over a year after that for me to realize that my ex was a total nutjob and break up with him. Shortly after that my SO and I started seeing each other. We have a fantastic relationship and I have known for some time now that I want to spend the rest of my life with him.
We have talked about marriage and having kids and everything on a number of occasions, and we agree on pretty much everything except the timeline. We've talked about how fall of 2013 seems like a good time to get married, since at that point we'll have a few years of school under our belts and everything. But for some reason he feels like talking about a date three years from now means that I'm prepared to get married this instant. Obviously this is not the case and I've told him that, but he still gets bothered talking about a timeline. He has called me his future wife and told me how it would be such a dream come true to be married to me, which is so nice but I can't help but feeling bothered because I have no idea when he'll actually want to propose. We had a discussion recently where he asked me if I'd like to live together sooner rather than later, which felt pretty groundbreaking since before he wasn't sure if he wanted to move in with each other before getting married. I told him that I'd love to live with him whenever he decides the time is right.
So here I am waiting with the rest of you! So glad to not be alone & looking forward to getting to know some of you!
Hi, all. I've been reading (lurking) here for a while, and finally got the courage to join in the conversation :) My bf and I have been together for a little over a year now, and moved in together last month.
We have kind of a weird situation, which is what drove me to google things like "when is her going to propose!??!?!?" haha, and led me to this site. We've known each other for about five years (met in college). In the last 3 years, we'd spend every day together, even wayy before we were official--I used to waitress and he'd pick me up every night, get me dinner, and drop me home. We joke now that it took him 2 years of hard work and gas money to even get a kiss out of me :) It was absolutely worth the time, because it allowed us to build a truly deep friendship, and we had tons of time to discuss our life goals, priorities, etc.
The night that he told me that he wanted to be in a relationship, it was a big decision for us because we were already so close and had put so much time into getting to know each other. When I explained that it felt like "a big deal" to make the switch from friends to bf/gf he agreed, and right then and there admitted that he'd known for a long time that he wanted me to be his wife. So, as you can imagine, I've been daydreaming about marrying him since then!
So now, I'm waiting. Unfortunately I think it might be longer than I want it to be, because he's really intent on getting his career stable before we get married, and he's not a super fast worker...so we'll see. In the meantime, I hope to come here & indulge in all the wedding-y thoughts I want without pressuring him.
I just found this website last week, and it's fantastic! I'm sure it's going to help out a lot.
BF and I dated for two years in high school and were madly in love; we talked often about getting married. He ended up breaking up with me after the first semester of college because we both needed to grow up, and we were doing that together. We didn't even talk for two and a half years, and it was another two after that before we saw each other again. Things just clicked, and despite the fact that I was (and still am, for another two weeks) living on the other side of the world, we started dating soon after that. That was about nine months ago. We know we want to get married next fall or early next winter, and we talk about it frequently. I don't think he has the ring yet, but we're going together to visit my parents in a little over a month, and I think he's going to talk to them then. After that, I think it should be pretty quick - I expect before Halloween.
I'm just so deeply in love with him, and I feel so lucky to have found him not once, but twice. Starting two and a half weeks from now, when we're finally living in the same country again, it's just going to be one happy thing after another. I can't wait.
hi! i've been with my OH for 3 years, met at 16 and are broke university students. very much in love but still have some growing up and studying to do
Hello Ladies,
I have been poking around the waiting board for a while now and figured maybe it was time to come out and introduce myself.
I am 25 and an associate fashion designer for three menswear brands. My BF (K) is 26, and a software engineer. We met our senior year in college because we have mutual friends, and my first memory of him is seeing him dropping my brand new digital camera on the floor after taking it out of my bag and taking inappropriate pictures of him and his friends (these pictures are now hilarious for me to look through, because I am now friends with most of those people). We randomly saw each other in social circles that year and then didn't see each other again til I moved to Brooklyn 2 years later. We reconnected at happy hours organized through a mutual friend, but were dating other people. I did however find out he was a NY Rangers fan...
When the guy I was seeing cancelled on me for a Rangers game I had invited him to the day before Christmas eve 2007, I panicked because I didn't want to go alone. I wound up getting K's number from a friend and inviting him to the game. I thought he still had a GF, he thought it was a date, and it was all sorted out by the end of the night when we made out in Penn Station. We were pretty much together ever since, becoming official somewhere along the way.
We lived about 3 hours apart for the first year and a half of our relationship, me in brooklyn and him in upstate NY. I convinced him to move down to the city, and about a year ago we moved in together into a tiny UES apartment.
The past year has been unbelievably rocky, and many unfortunate things have been thrown in our direction, but we have gotten through them together and feel stronger than ever.
We have talked generally about getting married for about 2 years or so, and i officially got confirmation that the proposal will come within the next 6 months.... hopefully on Gardenvision at our annual Dec 23rd hockey game....
So thats it. This community is amazing and I am so happy that I have found it before the planning starts!
I've been lurking and posting a tiny bit, though I just now realized I haven't posted an intro for "Waiting" yet. So hello!
I'm 25 and my SO is 30. We're a gay couple. We celebrated our one year anniversary a couple weeks ago and have been living together for six months. I knew after about five months of dating that I could be with her forever. On our 10-month anniversary we confided in each other (or rather, gushed/exploded with love) that we want to be married- And its been talked about seriously almost daily since!
One of our first realizations is that we're both big secret traditionalists despite being gay and feminists, and that we would both really enjoy a formal engagement - both the proposal as well as a unique time where we call each other fiances and seriously plan a wedding. So even though we are getting married, we are not engaged. Sounds kinda odd, huh?
We love the thought of becoming engaged when our lives settle down a smidge and we have a more steady income. I just finished my Masters degree and am still working an intern position (but crossing fingers and writing resume cover letters like mad to get me first Real Adult Job). SO has returned to college and has a good 1.5 years until she finishes her degree.
She has dreams of me proposing to her on her graduation day. Boy oh boy do I need patience like never before because that day is a long way off! I've had moments where I want to tear up in frustration because I would love to be engaged today. It takes a one-person-pity-party to last a few minutes before I'm back on track. Poor SO didn't realize she fell in love with a girl who bought 4 wedding magazines a month through out middle school and high school, how adores planning and spreadsheets, and can browse wedding blogs for hours!
I think the hardest thing for me personally is balancing the excitement for all the things to come without becoming impatient. That said - I'm going to be a lurker for some time on weddingbee, and love every second of it.
Hi everyone, I'm finally posting my very first post! I've been obsessively reading (esp the ring boards) but I didn't know the "waiting" board existed until recently.
I'm a 25-year-old grad student (doing a Ph.D) and my partner is in the same program, although he's 37 and just about to finish. Next year I'm moving to France to teach at a university in Paris, and he's coming with me! Just to be with me :)
We talk often about getting engaged-- we even were half-jokingly considering eloping for the purposes of obtaining a French visa-- but I think he is waiting to finish his Ph.D. and getting a job first before he makes the next move. But I'm not sure!!
Last night he told me "for the first time ever in my life, I've been thinking-- turning over in my head how exactly I would phrase asking your parents for your hand" :)
So sweet! BUt it makes me impatient... I'm so ready for the next step!
Hello bees! I've been lurking for quite some time now but finally decided to post!
Some background... I am a 24 year old legal assistant and my SO, who is 25, is a mechanical engineer. We met about four years ago through one of his old friends (who happened to be my boyfriend at the time... err, long story there.) We have been friends for years but finally started dating in February, 2009 and have been inseperable since!
I'm definitely a bee in waiting. About two months ago, SO took me to a local jeweler and had me pick out a ring. It was such a special and exciting event for us but at the same time it has been hard waiting. He has also been given my family's blessing. We've been discussing weddings alot lately as well (a wedding on the beach, perhps... we're both beach bums!) and it's making me so anxious! I am pretty sure he will be asking soon from the hints he has been dropping but in the meantime I'll be here waiting!
Hi, I'm Miss Scribbles and I live in Auckland, NZ
Mr Scribbles and I have been together for 16 months and I've know for about half of them that he is definitely the one for me. We had originally spoken on a dating website but I had pulled my profile when my mother got cancer. About 9 months later I met one of his friends at a church function and added him on Facebook, Mr Scribbles saw the add and remembered my name; he decided to message me and the rest is history! We're living together, we're best friends and we're the only ones who can handle each other and our odd ball natures!
I work as an English and Drama teacher and Mr Scribbles works in freight forwarding. He's my best friend and I can't wait for that ring that promises he will be my best friend forever
Anyone else think that Alicia Keys' - Unthinkable is the waiting be anthem? lol
Yep, MissSawyer, I do. I annoy him with singing that and showing my left hand.LOL
Hi all!
I'm new to weddingbee, and a lady in waiting, indeed. My little sister got engaged in March and in starting to help her plan, as I am her MOH, I have caught total wedding fever.
My SO and I have been together for a little over 2 years, and have been living together for over a year now. Although marriage has been brought up, we haven't had any real detailed talks about it, and there's not really a timeline in place (at least not that I know of!!) He's finishing his PhD at the end of August, and has said before he doesn't feel we could get engaged until he has a job...so that's what I am (not so patiently) waiting for now.
We met online, but only chatted for a few days before we met in person. It was an instant connection and we were together every day after that. I distinctly remember on our third date, realizing that I was falling in love with him, and not long after that I knew he was the one I wanted to spend my life with.
Right now I am trying not to get frustrated. He's pretty traditional, and has dropped some pretty big hints in the past that he wants it to be a big surprise. I'm all for that. We haven't looked at rings or anything - I'm hoping he'll suggest it.
Since I am working on my master's degree, we will soon be embarking on about a year of long-distance. I know we are strong, and it will be ok, but I really hope if we're not engaged by the time he leaves that at least we will have had a *serious* timeline talk.
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