Waiting Bees – Did you lose excitement as time passed?

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
4043 posts
Honey bee

@peonyinlove:  Hmmm…honestly can’t say that happened to me.

I had been with my FI for 9 years when he proposed on our anniversary. I actually wasn’t super angsty/giddy until about a month before it happened. We had discussed marriage a few years before, but wanted to wait until we were more established in our careers/life/etc. 

I was beyond excited leading up to the trip we took for our anniversary and the entire time until he proposed.

Maybe your excitement has just dulled down a bit because it’s been building for so long?

Post # 4
Member
1688 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@peonyinlove:  Yes by the time my FI actually proposed I could have cared less. It had taken him 2 1/2 to 3 years after he said he was going to do it. He proposed with a placeholder ring that I’m still wearing…

Post # 5
Member
2661 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

@bmo88:  I’m with you on this one.

 @peonyinlove:  I’ve been with SO a little over 7 years, living together a little over 2.5 years. We had discussed an original timeline that I thought he would be comfortable with, but I realized I don’t want to wait that long. We talked again, moved our timeline up by a year, are working on getting the ring designed and will be officially engaged in about 2 months. And I couldn’t be more excited! I’m basically dancing around with excitement, I’m totally jazzed!

If you’re in law school right now, maybe the practical side of you is thinking that you could probably hold off longer so you’ll be closer to graduation/already graduated when you’re married. The original timeline I wanted (and hadn’t really told SO about) would’ve had us married by next summer at the latest, but then I decided to go back to grad school and realized next year isn’t an option.

Post # 6
Member
39 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2014 - Brigalia's

I’m sure when he actually does propose, you WILL be excited!

Post # 9
Member
1688 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@peonyinlove:  Lol, thanks. It doesn’t bother me anymore. I love him and are happy to be with him.

Maybe you are just in lull 🙂 It gets quite boring, waiting. I hope it’s wonderful either way.

Post # 11
Member
243 posts
Helper bee

i dont  think i will lose excitemebt, however i am getting more annoyed aa time goes by and getting that ” w e” attitude because he keeps sayi.g how he wants nothing more than to do it yet he keeps dipping into the savings account that he created for the ring..i mean if he wanted it that bad then he wouldnt be using the ring money for stupid crap like beer …so im getting more annoyed than non excited…im at the point where i jave my timeline in my head and if he doesnt do it by then, then he must have doubts or commitment issues and im not dealing with that bs lol

Post # 12
Member
240 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@peonyinlove:  I was really excited when we first started looking at rings. But then by the time we actually bought the ring I was feeling kind of meh… He’s supposed to propose sometime in July and I am also feeling like I could wait longer. So you are not alone. I think once the proposal happens and we can start telling people we’ll feel all giddy again. If you’re in law school you’re probably more logical than emotional anyway. I know that’s the case for me.

I also think part of that giddy feeling we get over a proposal has to do with the uncertainty we felt about the relationship. Like for most people even if you are in love and have been together a long time you are having at least some of those “Why hasn’t he proposed? Are we going to break up? What will I be doing a year from now?” sort of thoughts. And when you get the proposal you’re so happy because you’re feeling like “He really DOES want to be with me forever!” So even without the proposal yet, once I knew it was actually finally really happening it was kind of a relief and I locked in on “This is the plan. I’m doing this now.”. 

Post # 13
Member
11668 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It’s a big step – and while it feels exciting when it’s far away, when it’s actually upon you and “real” and happening, it does make you nervous because it is such a big step!

Enjoy the anticipation while you still have it – you’ll miss it when it’s gone! 

Post # 14
Member
1535 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

I’m still really excited! Last week, I found out that it will be happening sometime this summer, and it’s made me so excited!

I think it all depends on how you deal with things

Post # 16
Member
858 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I can totally relate! I just posted a thread recently touching on the same subject. It’s hard to maintain the same kind of momentum and excitement as time passes; I think that’s normal. Doesn’t mean you don’t want to marry him, just that you’ve had your time to be excited, and that didn’t necessarily coincide with the actual proposal… 🙁 This is my biggest peeve with waiting, I like being excited! And now I just feel like it’s inevitable because we’ve talked about it so much and STILL have to wait a little while longer. I’m not even annoyed, I just miss that sense of moving towards something that I felt when it was a new feeling, instead of a constant state of “getting close now”. I’m sure once you get engaged, you’ll get excited again! Don’t feel guilty if you’re not excited about waiting anymore; just look forward to being excited for your wedding to come once you do get engagedd! 🙂

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