(Closed) Waiting Pet Peeves

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 5
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

I hate how many “So when are you guys going to get hitched?” and “Why are you not engaged yet?” comments I am getting lately. UGH.

Post # 6
Member
2408 posts
Buzzing bee

i get annoyed with the “why don’t you propose to him?” well, i didn’t realize it was just that simple. if i could i would have! there are extenuenting circumstances that have kept us from getting married sooner so it’s not like i’m waiting for him to get off his butt and decide it’s time to propose, but proposing is something that he WANTS to do and feels like he MUST do so whom am i to take that from him?

in the end, my proposing to him is not an option. please stop suggesting it and making me feel stupid for not taking matters into my own hands as a “modern woman in modern times.”

Post # 7
Member
5658 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

@tea: I hate that too! 

Post # 9
Member
119 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@DeathByDesign:

Oh gosh, I HATE those questions too! It’s like.. Do you honestly think I’m not wondering the same thing?!

Post # 10
Member
2305 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I hate when people carelessly ask “So when’s the wedding” Eh are you even paying for it, mind your business and wait till you see a ring on my finger or better yet invitation in the mail.Yell

Post # 11
Member
40 posts
Newbee

I swear, if I hear one more person tell me that I don’t love him because I’m not willing to wait forever, I am going to lose it. The way I see it, getting engaged is for women what going “all the way” is for men. Most men I know would not date a women and wait indefinitely to “seal the deal.” At some point, he would get tired of waiting, and leave the relationship, and no one would judge him for that-it would be understood that they want different things and must go their separate ways. Getting engaged is the same thing-at some point, it becomes obvious that two people want different things, and the relationship is not going to work. 

I am tired of people who think no one could be ready before they were. I am 22, and I constantly hear, “you’re so young! I wasn’t ready until 27, 30, 35, etc!” Umm…congratulations? Aren’t we always saying that “ready” is different for everyone? 

I really don’t like having engaged women give me advice on waiting. Usually, they tell me to just be patient because it will happen. Well, for them, that worked-it DID happen. However, there ARE men out there who string women along and never actually propose. 

I also hate being told that I should propose to him. He’s obviously not ready, so how would that solve anything? If he was ready to get engaged, wouldn’t he have proposed? Wouldn’t that just escalate the issue? Wouldn’t that just put him in a no-win situation? 

 

Post # 12
Member
2305 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

@April_Mae:

This–> The way I see it, getting engaged is for women what going “all the way” is for men. Most men I know would not date a women and wait indefinitely to “seal the deal.” At some point, he would get tired of waiting, and leave the relationship, and no one would judge him for that-it would be understood that they want different things and must go their separate ways

So true!

Post # 13
Member
359 posts
Helper bee

FINALLY – a group of bees I can relate to!!

I love my BF like no other.  However, I was married for 6 1-2 years to a man that was no much more than a 30 year old child.  I finally got divorced because I knew we could never have a family, and that was important to me.  I’m only doing this twice – if for whatever reason it doesn’t work out the second time, I’m done.  I want to be in a relationship with someone who has the same goals as me and is looking for the same thing in life.  No matter how much I love my BF, if we’re not on the same page and he’s just stringing me along…we gots problems!

Post # 14
Member
223 posts
Helper bee

@April_Mae:On the already engaged ladies topic… I can’t stand when they tell you to be patient!!!  I have a friend who was JUST LIKE ME when she was waiting to get engaged…now she is all “be patient, don’t take this from him and ruin it!”

Post # 15
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Every since Single Ladies came out…I am tired of people telling me, “Tell him to put a ring on it!”  Yell

Post # 16
Member
297 posts
Helper bee

I get annoyed by the assumption that we’re already married by my co-workers and even his family. I’m in my late 20’s and he’s in his mid-thirties so because of our ages and the fact that we live together with our kids (blended family), people already assume we’re married.  For example:

“So what are you and your husband doing for Christmas?” (“well, me and my ‘why-buy-the-cow-when-the-milk-is-for-free’ boyfriend are going to his parents…”)

From his sister-in-law introducing me to her friend: “Hi, __________, you’ve met my sister-in-law, Phoenix, right?”  (“No, let me correct you, I’m your brother-in-law’s girlfriend…get it right…”)

From a Christmas card addressed to SO and myself from his parents, it says “Love, Mom and Dad” (I know, that one isn’t unusual, but I still feel the pang)

My co-workers and employees don’t even ask me anymore if we’re getting married yet because they forget that we’re not.  And when I do say something about wanting a proposal, on occassion I’ll hear “Well you guys already live like you’re married…what’s the big deal?”  WTF

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