WAITING SO LONG TO PROPOSE ….. it's lost it's excitement

posted 2 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
Member
560 posts
Busy bee

You might stop thinking about it, almost giving up.. and then when you least expect it, it could happen.

If it means so much to you, it WILL be special, however it happens.

Post # 3
Member
2578 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I waited just shy of 9 years, living together for 7.5 of them, and had a 5-year-old with the man before he popped the question… I was on the edge of my seat waiting for quite some time, but it was still special.

Post # 4
Member
584 posts
Busy bee

My husband and I were together for 6.5 years before he proposed and I was seriously waiting for about 1.5 years (though I was thinking about it for 5!).  I feel like all the waiting, and the buzz that was generated by friends and family (“When are you going to get married?!” “you guys are perfect together!”) that it was still insanely exciting when we finally did get engaged.  You’re so in the moment that when it happens you’re not even thinking about all the waiting, you’re just shocked and excited that it’s actually happening. Also, I feel like everyone celebrated more than they would have because they were so happy we finally did it, versus wondering if we were making the right decision but acting happy for us.

Post # 5
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: November 2014

i agree with brighteyedgirl,  we were together 8 and a half years before my fiance proposed.  i always thought i’d know when it was going happen, but he did it in just a way that he was just being himself, a kid at heart, that i didn’t think anything of it!  I was still surprised 🙂

Post # 6
Member
172 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I agree – it will be special and exciting because it’s happened. My FI proposed on our 4 year anniversary after talking about it for a couple of years and having bought the ring 6 months in advance (which I suspected but didn’t actually know). I knew it was going to happen but not when and although our anniversary was coming up I honestly thought he wouldn’t do it that weekend because we were away representing our city for a volleyball competition. He proposed very low key and ‘us’ in the hotel room and it was perfect and special because it was our moment. Be patient 🙂 It will still be special and exciting! 

Post # 7
Member
1205 posts
Bumble bee

Kind of. We’re way, way past three years and it’s at the point where I don’t want to make any fuss about it when it happens. Just casually move from serious relationship to engaged. I doubt that anyone, including myself, will be surprised. 

Based on what everyone else has said, I’m probably/hopefully wrong 🙂

Post # 8
Member
314 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

LLMMCC:  My bf and I got engaged on Saturday and while hit our 3 year anniversary at the end of the month. We knew we wanted to get married about 1.5yr in and actively started looking at rings last fall. I’d say I was officially in waiting for about 1 year. I knew he had the ring, but the proposal was still a surprise, to the point where I cried and I am totally not a crying type of gal! Trust me, when it happens, it will feel brand new and all the excitement will come rushing back!!

Post # 9
Member
2428 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

My husband proposed on our 7 year anniversary, and it was the most special thing ever! It was also a total surprise. I never knew he was shopping for a ring. I loved it!

Post # 10
Member
2125 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

LLMMCC:  My fiancé proposed after 6.5 years of dating. We had been talking about marriage for a year or so before he proposed. Sure, the waiting process can be brutal, but no matter what, if the one you love gets down on one knee and asks to you spend the rest of your life with him/her, the moment will be special.  I wouldn’t worry about it 🙂

Post # 11
Member
4 posts
Wannabee

I feel the exact same way. September will be 3 years for us…and he asked my parents over a YEAR AGo! My excitement over every special occasion that comes up and hope that it will happen builds up, and then when it doesn’t…I’m left with dissapointment and I hate to say it, but hurt feelings and feeling like a silly fool. I try and tell myself to NOT get my hopes up, but you know how well THat works : /. I am so completely over his prolonging the waiting and procrastination that I feel it definitely doesn’t have the same ‘excitement’ and elated feelings that I had when he first asked my parents because I’m a little jaded, fustrated and unfortun. resentful. : ( Sorry to be a debbie downer, I’ve just had a rough couple of past days with this topic. I’m sure that when it happens for us… that moment will indeed be joyous and happy and the negative feelings and all this ridiculously hard waiting time will be forgotten. I hope. Please feel free to private message me if you want to talk or for support with are similar situations. You are not alone.

Post # 12
Member
2791 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - Walnut Hill Bed & Breakfast

It was 5 years for us and he’d taken me ring shopping 2 years before. I knew he had the ring for 3 weeks before he did it and at the moment i was still surprised/shocked. We’d past so many of my “deadlines” and I was really getting fed up waiting too. The moment will still be special…. try not to think about it too much. 

Post # 13
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee

I’m still waiting.. The ring just finished and he’s suppose to pick it up today! I’m dying lol. I am one of the most impatient people… I think I’ve been extremely annoying about it lol. I sent him this today LOL

Post # 14
Member
7 posts
Newbee

Absolutely. I mean, I’m sure it will be special. But exciting? Nope. The surprise element will be completely gone. He is no closer to proposing today than he was ten years ago. If I didn’t love him, I’d give up waiting.

Post # 15
Member
592 posts
Busy bee

Lol my SO and I were talking about this. An old fashioned proposal is important to him, he was explaining how much it mattered to him that I was surprised. I made the point that there’s no true surprise at this point after having talked about it so much. XD

The proposal can be romantic and great, but really it’s just one moment. If it is storybook romance than great! If not than you have an entire lifetime together to create romantic moments. 

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