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Waiting to have a baby until 29

posted 1 year ago in Babies
  • 1 Members Subscribed To Topic
  • poll: How old were you when you had your first baby?
    20-24 : (8 votes)
    7 %
    25-29 : (44 votes)
    40 %
    30-34 : (52 votes)
    48 %
    >35 : (3 votes)
    3 %
    Less than 20 : (2 votes)
    2 %
  •  
    1.
    Member
    4,925 posts
    Honey bee
    bestbuddies    June 6, 2010   Chicago, Illinois

    Hi ladies,

    DH and I are ready to have babies but a great opportunity just came up for me to get my masters at my job and also very very cheap. 

    Long story short....I am nervous about waiting until I am almost 30 to start a family. What if we wait to long and I cant have kids. Is 30 way to early to be worried about that? It seems there is conflicting infromation online about when a womens fertility decreases. 

    So, my question is how old where you when you had your first baby? also i am welcoming any thoughts on this subject. 

     

    Thanks!

     
    2.
    Member
    4,151 posts
    Honey bee
    Meowkers    August 27, 2011   Los Angeles, CA

    Wow I feel old.  I'm currently 27 and just last night told FI that I  don't even want to think about kids until at least 30.  then we can talk.  

     
    3.
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    1,848 posts
    Buzzing bee
    firsttimemom    December 18, 2010  

    The "average" age for women to be TTC now is 32. 

     
    4.
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    765 posts
    Busy bee
    Lindsay05    August 21, 2010   Canada

    I'm hoping to be pregnant by end of year. I'll be 29. Sometimes that's just the way it works out. I'm not worried at all. 

     
    5.
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    4,925 posts
    Honey bee
    bestbuddies    June 6, 2010   Chicago, Illinois

    @Meowkers: dont feel old! I guess this is my question. Am I just being paranoid? I have this weird thing that I am very afraid that I cannot have kids. I think it is because DH wants kids so bad and I would be heart broken if I could not give him that. I am crying just thinking about it. lol Boy I am emotional about this subject. :)

     
    6.
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    4,925 posts
    Honey bee
    bestbuddies    June 6, 2010   Chicago, Illinois

    @firsttimemom: oh, cool. That is an interesting stat to know. Thanks for sharing!

     
    7.
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    2,630 posts
    Sugar bee
    Ms Mini    July 17, 2010   Medicine Hat, AB

    I am hoping to be pregnant sometime this year (I am 27, 28 in august).

     
    8.
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    5,376 posts
    Bee Keeper
    pinkshoes    July 2011   MA

    I'll be 32 when I start TTC.  Hit that average right on the head!  =)

     
    9.
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    1,141 posts
    Bumble bee
    SBourgeous    February 1, 2011  

    I'm not pregnant yet, but I'm hoping to start TTC next year.

    EDIT: Guess I should probably include that I just turned 23.

     
    10.
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    1,094 posts
    Bumble bee
    MrsDulce    April 21, 2012   Fort Lauderdale, FL

    @Meowkers: EXACT SAME HERE!

     
    11.
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    3,066 posts
    Sugar bee
    kperry3    January 1, 1991  

    Now days, I've heard several women having their first child between the ages of 30-34. I am definitely going to wait until I'm 30 to have kids... IF I have kids :) Then again, you do hear a lot of women who have trouble becoming pregnant. It's a hard process but worth it if you feel you need to wait. And who knows, even if you start now you may have the same type of difficulties. Goodluck! :)

     
    12.
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    2,616 posts
    Sugar bee
    Entangled    September 17, 2011   Carmel, CA

    I didn't vote because I haven't had a baby and don't intend to, but I do want to assure you that it's pretty normal to wait until 29 or later.  Of all the dozens of women I know, only four have had or are planning to have kids before age 30.

     
    13.
    Member
    3,353 posts
    Sugar bee
    MsMamaBear       Atlanta

    I'll have my 1st baby in September. I turn 30 next month.

     
    14.
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    Member
    396 posts
    Helper bee
    ms_nickie    January 1, 2011  

    We're waiting until we're married to start a family and I'll be 34 a month after the wedding.  It's not a big deal.  It was important for both of us to have as much fun as possible being childless because we have seen a lot of friends have children too young and then feel trapped. 

     
    15.
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    243 posts
    Helper bee
    cheapchicbride    August 27, 2011   Cedar Rapids, IA

    We are not going to start TTC until I am 29 1/2 (haha) - basically around our one year anniversary. We are planning on two for sure, hopefully three. I have 6 really close girlfriends from college, and most of us are waiting until our 30's. I think it's a great age to have kids - you're established, have money, got the partying stuff out of the way - I say don't be paranoid and go for your masters!

     
    16.
    Member
    2,146 posts
    Buzzing bee
    MapleBecky    July 9, 2011   Canada

    29 1/2.   I was ready but my boyfriend wasn't.  He ended up bailing shortly after, but I was established in my career, owned my house and have done well.   I wouldn't do it any younger than that.

     
    17.
    Member
    4,018 posts
    Honey bee
    abbyful    June 7, 2011   Kansas City

    Not pregnant yet, but we're going to start trying this summer, so I'll probably be 29 when we have our first.

     
    18.
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    918 posts
    Busy bee
    lauren810c    August 21, 2010   NYC

    I'm 33 and will start trying soon, so you can definitely wait if you need to!

     
    19.
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    4,925 posts
    Honey bee
    bestbuddies    June 6, 2010   Chicago, Illinois

    thanks for sharing ladies. So far, it seems most people these days are having kids age 25-34! LOVE IT! this makes me feel better already! :)

     
    20.
    Member
    2,168 posts
    Buzzing bee
    cannotwait    February 1, 2009   TX

    I had my baby @ 30.  My job paid for my masters, and I graduated at 30.  Luckily, I got pregnant within a month of graduation, so at least for me it worked out. 
    Good luck!

     
    21.
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    Member
    378 posts
    Helper bee
    CheesetomyWhine    10/30/10   Rhode Island

    I don't think 30 is a bad age. For me personally, we are planning to try for our first around our 1 year anniversary...I will be 22. However, my mum had me at 32 and my daddy was 60 :)

    P.S. Congrats on the opportunity to get your master's through your job!

     
    22.
    Member
    8,465 posts
    Bumble
    Beekeeper
    KatyElle      

    It becomes more difficult after age 35, but lots of women are having babies later in life. and 29 is YOUNG!!! Plenty of time!

     
    23.
    Member
    1,480 posts
    Bumble bee
    carrieknitscake    October 10, 2009   Chicago, IL

    @bestbuddies: I'll be TTC around our second anniversary in October this year. I'm currently 31 and got married at 29. Not too old at all. As long as I have all of the kids we desire by 35, I'm not worried.

     
    24.
    Member
    740 posts
    Busy bee
    MissKatelyn    July 9, 2011   Live in Westchester, NY / wedding near Portland, OR

    I haven't had kids, but my mom was almost 31 when she had me, and 35 when she had my brother. So not too old I think.

     
    25.
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    1,864 posts
    Buzzing bee
    egb    January 2010  

    We're TTC and I should be 29 when we have our first, if we don't have problems conceiving.

     
    26.
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    Bee
    801 posts
    Busy bee
    cheese    May 2009   Knoxville

    I'm 31 and pregnant now, will be just barely 32 when I give birth. *Knocking on wood* I got lucky and our TTC was only a month. Not to say that's everyone's experience (I certainly didn't expect it, and was taken aback when we found out we were pg), but it's possible, fo sho.

    I'm nervous already about baby #2. I'd like to wait until my son (OMG I can say "my son") is at least two before we TTC, but that would put me at the dreaded 35 for my second child.

     
    27.
    Member
    1,011 posts
    Bumble bee
    R.Elliott    September 24, 2011   Dallas, TX

    My mom and dad had me at 30. I had always "planned" to have kids around the same time.

    BUT I met my FI early and we'll be married when he's 25 and I'm 24 and we want to start making those babies ASAP. I graduated college young and we've both been out in the work force for several years and are financially stable. Plus, there's nothing else "pressing" that we want to get done (already traveled a TON, don't plan on getting any more schooling, etc.)

    Just wanted to share a youngin's point of view. We'll be younger than originally planned, but we are pretty mature for our age, I'd say.

     
    28.
    Member
    654 posts
    Busy bee
    Krises       NYC

    I'd look at it this way. It will probably be a lot easier for you to conceive at age 29-30 (probably not a huge difference than what age you are now, right?) than for you to go back to school and get your master's while you are parenting an infant/toddler/young child. So if furthering your education is an important goal for you, I'd jump on this opportunity now. I might get some testing etc. done at your dr. to see if there would be any impediment to conceiving so you can be fully informed when you make this decision, though.

     
    29.
    Member
    286 posts
    Helper bee
    Leesh    September 16, 2011   California

    I don't have children but my parents had me at 35 and FIs parents had him at 31. You should be okay.

     
    30.
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    Member
    528 posts
    Busy bee
    trulyblessed    July 7, 2012  

    @bestbuddies: We are going to start TTC next summer and I will be 32.. So I guess if all goes well and I get pregnant during that time, I will actually be 33 (or going on 33) when I actually have the baby. I agree with the PP, most of the women I know wanted to get school out the way and establish themselves before TTC... so many women are having babies in their 30s now.

     
    31.
    Member
    3,947 posts
    Honey bee
    bRooklynRocks      

    Wow, don't I feel old :( I'm 32, will be married just before 33. If we start TTC then, I probably woud have a kid nearer 34 etc. Oh well, that's life. My mum had me at 22. Most of my friends are starting to have kids now in their 30's. I live in NYC if that helps. Age skews higher here for marriage and kids.

     
    32.
    Member
    707 posts
    Busy bee
    MzMarzipan    July 24, 2010   Califonia

    It is way common for women to have babies in their 30s.  I will be 34 (2 months shy of 35) when our first is born in September.  Most of my close friends and family were in their 30s when they stated having babies.  I have to say, I did start getting a little worried about not being able to get pregnant before we stated.  Then I reminded my self of a couple things:

    1. Some women/couples have a difficult time getting pregnant in their 20s, so age doesn't really matter that much.
    2. I already forgot my second point...sorry, I've got baby brain going on!

    The truth is that you will never know until you try!  It only took us about 5 months after I went off the pill! 

     
    33.
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    2,074 posts
    Buzzing bee
    Ms.Teddy    April 2011   South Carolina

    probably around 30! i am turning 27 tomorrow. i am still WAY too immature for that kind of responsibility.

     
    34.
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    4,622 posts
    Honey bee
    KristenGotMarried    May 19, 2012   The Cbus

    We're not interested in having kids, but I have to say that 30 is still plenty young!!!  I have a friend who had her first at 38, and while she had a few issues, she and her baby are perfectly healthy and awesome.  Don't ever put a cap on your fertility age unless a doctor has told you, for certain, that you will have an issue if you don't conceive by X years.  Even then I'd bet there's still room for error though.  Do what's right for you and FI!

     
    35.
    Member
    4,925 posts
    Honey bee
    bestbuddies    June 6, 2010   Chicago, Illinois

    Thanks ladies for sharing your experiences and letting me know your thoughts. Honestly I am not thrilled about waiting but I think it would be good for me to get my masters. I am due for my yearly check up this summer. I will talk to her then. DH really wants me to take this opportunity to get my masters even though he really wants kids.

    Also, I want to be more healthy before we start having kids anyway and that will take me probably a year to get there. So I guess even if I did not get my masters I would still be about 27 while TTC. I plan on getting off BC soon too. I think BC is a factor (obviousy my diet and exercise are too!) in my holding on to this weight. So we will do the calender thing. So, I think I will probably do the masters regardless. :) 

     

     
    36.
    Member
    863 posts
    Busy bee
    farmgirl2106    July 2010  

    My aunt had both her kids after she was thirty, and they are both normal, very bright chillins. Pretty talented and athletic too! :) Don't let the internet scare you... If you let it, you're going to be pulling out your hair once you actually get to that point that you are pregnant!

     
    37.
    Member
    2,163 posts
    Buzzing bee
    eeniebeans    October 9, 2010   Baltimore

    I had my first daughter when I was 26.  I will be 34 when this baby is born.  I had no trouble conceiving, but I'm not gonna lie- it is harder this time around!  I do feel older and more worn out this pregnancy.  Not unbearable or anything- just dont have the spunk I did when I was younger.

     
    38.
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    480 posts
    Helper bee
    elliegraye    July 2, 2011   BC Canada

    @bestbuddies:  Absolutely hands down go for your Masters first. I have two  kids and my schooling got interrupted and have not made it back yet. It's okay to wait. You will feel more confident, mature, done what you wanted to do and then have a family. 

     
    39.
    Hostess
    2,188 posts
    Buzzing bee
    Erindesmar    October 17, 2009   Boston, MA

    We also put our professions first when figuring out our timeline for marrying/having kids and also just wanted some time to be married before TTC.  We started TTC recently and I'm 30 (31 in July) - if all goes well, I'll have my first at 31.  If it doesn't go well and takes longer or we have issues...honestly, I wouldn't change anything.  I loved having our 1.5 year of marriage to enjoy marriage and each other.

     
    40.
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    Member
    224 posts
    Helper bee
    beebeebuzzbuzz    September 2011   Florida

    I don't have kids yet, but I would like to start trying around 29-30.  I don't think that's too old at all.  The gerneral thought is that women closer to 35 and over start having more complications to have a healthy baby.  I don't think you would have less of a chance concieving at 29 (of coarse I don't know your medical history, so I am just generalizing this.

    Now if you go after your masters and are able to plan when you will graduate, what if you TTC six to seven months before you graduate?  That could give you some extra time to finish school and ease your fertility fears at the same time.  Like I said, I've never been pregnant, so I'm no expert, and I don't know what it would be like to pusue a masters and study while pregnant, but it was just a thought.

     

     

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