Post # 1
So I have been waiting quite some time for a proposal, we hit 7 years this June. our proposal got derailed (again) by his brother proposing this past June. An I’m still waiting I’m 99.9999% sure I can’t say 100% because I haven’t seen it, he has the ring and is proposing on our upcoming vaca! Don’t get me wrong I’m Crazy excited with anticipation!
But here is my worry. My best friend and I were chatting about how because I’ve been waiting and it’s been derailed a few times do feel like when it does happen I won’t have “that reaction” (side note I’m an emotional disaster I cry about everything for no reason not by choice!) I had never thought about it, and now I can’t seem to get it out of my mind.
did any bees worry/do worry about this? (Im not completely overthinking this but I just was wondering!)
Post # 3
I’m sure you’ll be SO thrilled when it happens!
Post # 4
@BrandNewBride: O I know I will I’ll be marrying my best friend Just a totally weird thought!
Post # 5
Oh believe me I’m an emotional roller coaster too. Problem with me is all my SO keeps saying soon, soon. Ugh how soon is soon grr… and I can’t get anything out of him if he has a ring or not. :/ I’ve already told him my worries and concerns so now I literally have to endure waiting even more.
Post # 6
@wanabeabee: It can be VERY hard to stay focused on the positive in situations like this UGH.
When Mr VB and I got together, I set a timeline. We started dating when I was 27, and I was ready to be married by 30. Well…FBIL proposed to his GF. 8 months before my 30th. Funny thing was….Mr VB told me it was his OTHER brother who bought the ring and was supposed to propose to HIS GF…they’ve been dating longer and bought a house.
So…I just had to go my FBIL/FSILs wedding, and now I have to wait for these other people to get engaged, then have a wedding…AND THEN it can be my turn. If I’m lucky, I’lll be married before (wait for it) THRITY EFFING FIVE (yes 35). UGH UGH UGH!! I WANT TO SCREAM FML sometimes like really really loud haha.
If I think about it too much, I become a bitter bitter bee…and I hate myself for being like this but it’s hard to not want what you want.
Just try and think positive thoughts about how much you love your SO…and go crazy on pintrest planning your special day and what I’ve done personally is take notes. I want my wedding to be special, different, so whatever the other girls are doing no matter HOW badly I wanted to do these things, I’m planning to do the opposite.
Hang in there and good luck!
Post # 7
@katiecat08: Ugg! Im happy someone else is like me!! just a second ago I was crying at a comercial! and yes the only reason why I think he got the ring is because he showed my best friend his 2 top runners to make sure! other then that Im so out of the loop!!! It makes me SOOO Crazy!
@veryberry13: My FBIL proposing was prob the biggest slap in the face for my BF! the day before my bday and on OUR anniversary. And he hasnt been with her that long! He is older but not by much! its like hes just getting it over with. My now FSIL said that if we get engaged in dec I would be stealing her thunder! I made it very clear to my BF we had plans and were keeping them this time. You stay strong your slelf! its so hard putting on a happy face!!!
There are so many fellow waiting bees Im cheering for!!!!!!! Thank god for wedding bee! My BF has been like “”whats wrong with you you havent been so crazy?” Its because I can vent to ladies who actually know what im talking about!
Post # 8
@wanabeabee: I was in the same boat! Proposal kept getting derailed by one thing or another, and I was thoroughly convinced that I was not going to have the reaction I had always thought I would. Fast forward to that incredible moment, and I was bawling my eyes out and jumping in happiness. Nothing you have built up in your head will compare to the actual moment that the love of your life drops to one knee and asks you to marry him. Congratulations on you upcoming engagement!!!
Post # 9
@SarahTee: OOOOO that is so good to hear! Congratulations to you too!!
Post # 10
@wanabeabee: I was just thinking about this today! I’ll probably respond with ” are you actually sure sure?” I feel like I’ve been waiting forever!!! We’ve been together over 3 years! I’m afraid of what my reaction will be! I could just say ” well about time” throw on the ring and take a nap I’m that exhausted by it all ha ha!!
im sure when it happens I will be excited! When is your vacation? We go away the end of the month and I have a sneaking suspicion it may happen then eek!’
Post # 11
@wanabeabee: you’re not alone! I worry about this too because we’ve talked about the logistics of the engagement (money, timing, etc) so much now that I’m almost positive I know when it’s going to happen and I’m worried that I won’t be as excited as I would have been if I didn’t know. Here’s hoping to excited and happy reactions from both of us!
Post # 12
@veryberry13: You are a saint. I would not take it as well as you are. I say carry on with your life on your own timeline. You’ll only see a pouty “thunder stolen bridezilla SIL” on Christmas. Charge!!!!
Post # 13
@Bettyboo1982: HAHA! this is what me an my best friend were lauphing about!! only I said i would be like ” HUMMM let me think about it!” Haha I also feel like i will need a nap after all this
my vaca is Dec 6th! (32 days but whos counting!) I have my fingers crossed for you!
@valardohaeris: ugg im mentally exhausted! so much talk and nothing!
@SomedaymrsWDS: isnt she! I look up to her patience! and “thunder stolen brizezilla SIL”!!! HAHA! this made me lol!
Post # 14
Awww our situations sound very very similar… we’ve been together for over 9 years, now live together, love eachother like crazy..yet I am STILL waiting. It can be so disheartening and frusterating seeing everyone else pass you by with their engagements and them flaunting their rings on FB, etc…it’s hard!
I tried the whole ultimatum “I’m moving out if you haven’t proposed by the end of summer!” Summer ended… “I’ll give you 1 more month!” that month went by… GRRR!! My birthday is on the 20th, so it may happen then, or we have a cruise planned in January (I’m seriously thinking it might be then) If I don’t come back from vacation with a ring…he’s not coming back at all! hahah (I’ll feed him to a shark)
Post # 15
@wanabeabee: Okay THAT situation with your SO’s brother proposing on your bday/anniversary..UGH! I just had to re-read that again as I typed that to make sure that was correct because WOW that sucks!
“its like hes just getting it over with. My now FSIL said that if we get engaged in dec I would be stealing her thunder!”
I do get this and how crappy is that?!?! I know all about being told that we don’t want to steal anyone’s thunder…UGH! Thanks for your kind words that you had for me, and I hope that you are able to hang in there too. We can at least be here for eachother haha!!
@SomedaymrsWDS: This comment made me laugh and warmed my heart!! I wish I were a saint…how sweet are you!?! I take it well NOW…but I do share my words because it’s like this—In the last 12 months, I’ve seen FIL’s (FSILs/FBILs/FMIL/FFIL)…two times!! TWO TIMES!! Which means this: They probably have NO IDEA how much progress I’ve made, and I’m a bit horrified to think of how low I was…and how terrible my actions may have been perceived back then. I can laugh now…I just hope they can too lol.
To all bees on this thread and OP (I’ve had a few glasses of wine so if this sounds preachy hang with me)…Hang in there. I think most of us have waiting worries….and sometimes we make it bigger than it needs to be because it’s reasons out of our control (creating a ring, getting a heirloom, saving for a ring, planning proposal, getting families permission, or as in this post..WAITING for a relative to hurry up and have their wedding so that we can move on ALREADY lol)….
You are all awesome! Hang in there!
Post # 16
@wanabeabee: That’s my biggest fear. You are not alone! I actually posted about this a month or so back.
My FI/SO/BF? Idk what to call him at this point… has in fact proposed 3 TIMES…
1. drunk in NYC-caught in a moment
2. Surprise visited me-even more caught in the moment
3..waiting on that one..with the ring..
and I just feel at this point its happened twice and wil be the third that I just won’t have “the reaction” that he expects. And I know this scares him too because he feels like its not special anymore.. and to me its even more special! What girl has a man that loves her so much he proposes three times haha
Anyway, my long rant comes down to.. I think we all have that fear, some of us more than others. Its part of the waiting and hey.. who knows what your reaction will be but what you do know is that you’ll have excitement and love to last a lifetime and that is more than enough right?