Waiting worries!

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I’m sure you’ll be SO thrilled when it happens!

Post # 5
Member
204 posts
Helper bee

Oh believe me I’m an emotional roller coaster too. Problem with me is all my SO keeps saying soon, soon. Ugh how soon is soon grr… and I can’t get anything out of him if he has a ring or not. :/ I’ve already told him my worries and concerns so now I literally have to endure waiting even more. 

Post # 6
Member
2052 posts
Buzzing bee

@wanabeabee:  It can be VERY hard to stay focused on the positive in situations like this UGH.

When Mr VB and I got together, I set a timeline.  We started dating when I was 27, and I was ready to be married by 30.  Well…FBIL proposed to his GF.  8 months before my 30th.  Funny thing was….Mr VB told me it was his OTHER brother who bought the ring and was supposed to propose to HIS GF…they’ve been dating longer and bought a house.

So…I just had to go my FBIL/FSILs wedding, and now I have to wait for these other people to get engaged, then have a wedding…AND THEN it can be my turn.  If I’m lucky, I’lll be married before (wait for it) THRITY EFFING FIVE (yes 35).  UGH UGH UGH!!  Yell I WANT TO SCREAM FML sometimes like really really loud haha.

If I think about it too much, I become a bitter bitter bee…and I hate myself for being like this but it’s hard to not want what you want.

Just try and think positive thoughts about how much you love your SO…and go crazy on pintrest planning your special day and what I’ve done personally is take notes.  I want my wedding to be special, different, so whatever the other girls are doing no matter HOW badly I wanted to do these things, I’m planning to do the opposite.

Hang in there and good luck!

Post # 8
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@wanabeabee:  I was in the same boat! Proposal kept getting derailed by one thing or another, and I was thoroughly convinced that I was not going to have the reaction I had always thought I would. Fast forward to that incredible moment, and I was bawling my eyes out and jumping in happiness. Nothing you have built up in your head will compare to the actual moment that the love of your life drops to one knee and asks you to marry him. Congratulations on you upcoming engagement!!!

Post # 10
Member
703 posts
Busy bee

@wanabeabee:  I was just thinking about this today! I’ll probably respond with ” are you actually sure sure?”  I feel like I’ve been waiting forever!!! We’ve been together over 3 years! I’m afraid of what my reaction will be! I could just say ” well about time” throw on the ring and take a nap I’m that exhausted by it all ha ha!!

im sure when it happens I will be excited! When is your vacation? We go away the end of the month and I have a sneaking suspicion it may happen then eek!’

Post # 11
Member
177 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

@wanabeabee:  you’re not alone! I worry about this too because we’ve talked about the logistics of the engagement (money, timing, etc) so much now that I’m almost positive I know when it’s going to happen and I’m worried that I won’t be as excited as I would have been if I didn’t know. Here’s hoping to excited and happy reactions from both of us!

Post # 12
Member
451 posts
Helper bee

@veryberry13:  You are a saint. I would not take it as well as you are. I say carry on with your life on your own timeline. You’ll only see a pouty “thunder stolen bridezilla SIL” on Christmas. Charge!!!!

Post # 14
Member
397 posts
Helper bee

@veryberry13:

Awww our situations sound very very similar… we’ve been together for over 9 years, now live together, love eachother like crazy..yet I am STILL waiting. It can be so disheartening and frusterating seeing everyone else pass you by with their engagements and them flaunting their rings on FB, etc…it’s hard!

I tried the whole ultimatum “I’m moving out if you haven’t proposed by the end of summer!”  Summer ended… “I’ll give you 1 more month!”  that month went by…  GRRR!! My birthday is on the 20th, so it may happen then, or we have a cruise planned in January (I’m seriously thinking it might be then)  If I don’t come back  from vacation with a ring…he’s not coming back at all! hahah (I’ll feed him to a shark)  

Post # 15
Member
2052 posts
Buzzing bee

@wanabeabee:  Okay THAT situation with your SO’s brother proposing on your bday/anniversary..UGH!  I just had to re-read that again as I typed that to make sure that was correct because WOW that sucks!  

“its like hes just getting it over with. My now FSIL said that if we get engaged in dec I would be stealing her thunder!”

I do get this and how crappy is that?!?!  I know all about being told that we don’t want to steal anyone’s thunder…UGH!  Thanks for your kind words that you had for me, and I hope that you are able to hang in there too.  We can at least be here for eachother haha!! Cool

@SomedaymrsWDS:  This comment made me laugh and warmed my heart!!  I wish I were a saint…how sweet are you!?!  I take it well NOW…but I do share my words because it’s like this—In the last 12 months, I’ve seen FIL’s (FSILs/FBILs/FMIL/FFIL)…two times!!  TWO TIMES!!  Which means this:  They probably have NO IDEA how much progress I’ve made, and I’m a bit horrified to think of how low I was…and how terrible my actions may have been perceived back then.  I can laugh now…I just hope they can too lol.  

To all bees on this thread and OP (I’ve had a few glasses of wine so if this sounds preachy hang with me)…Hang in there.  I think most of us have waiting worries….and sometimes we make it bigger than it needs to be because it’s reasons out of our control (creating a ring, getting a heirloom, saving for a ring, planning proposal, getting families permission, or as in this post..WAITING for a relative to hurry up and have their wedding so that we can move on ALREADY lol)….

You are all awesome!  Hang in there!

Post # 16
Member
258 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@wanabeabee:  That’s my biggest fear. You are not alone! I actually posted about this a month or so back.

My FI/SO/BF? Idk what to call him at this point… has in fact proposed 3 TIMES… 

1. drunk in NYC-caught in a moment

2. Surprise visited me-even more caught in the moment

3..waiting on that one..with the ring..

 

and I just feel at this point its happened twice and wil be the third that I just won’t have “the reaction” that he expects. And I know this scares him too because he feels like its not special anymore.. and to me its even more special! What girl has a man that loves her so much he proposes three times haha

 

Anyway, my long rant comes down to.. I think we all have that fear, some of us more than others. Its part of the waiting and hey.. who knows what your reaction will be but what you do know is that you’ll have excitement and love to last a lifetime and that is more than enough right?

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