(Closed) Walk down the aisle without Dad

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
468 posts
Helper bee

What if  you and your hubs to be walked down the aisle together. Check out this article posted by one of the bees today, can’t remember which one. 

 

“Mr. PERASA: I’m workin’ on it. She said it was her call. She wants to walk out behind the casket alone. I guess that’s the way to do it because when we were married, you know how your brother takes you down, your father takes you down? She said, well, I don’t know which of my brothers to walk in with, I don’t want to offend anybody. I says, you walk in with me, you walk out with me and the other day I said who’s gonna walk down the aisle with you behind the casket, you know, to support her and she said nobody; I walked in with you alone. I’m walkin’ out with alone.” 

Post # 4
Member
317 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’m so sorry about your dad!  I lost my father in 2001, so i have the same problem.  Mom and I would be way too emotional I’m going to have my brother walk me down (and then we’re going to do a brother-sister dance at the reception instead of a father-daughter dance).  I’m so excited for my wedding, but I get choked up every time I think about walking down the aisle without my father.  I know I’m going to be a mess walking down that aisle no matter who’s with me! It’s a great compliment to the men our fathers were that we miss them this much!  Hugs!

Post # 6
Member
15 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2010

My situation is a little different but enough the same. My dad had an affair and left my family when I was 18 and I haven’t had a relationship with him since. My mom and my brother will BOTH be walking with me down the aisle!

Post # 7
Member
3788 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

My dad died when I was 6, and I would not want my mother walking me. Sometimes I freak out and think it will be scary and lonely to walk by myself, but I think it makes the most sense for me. I feel like I have had to find my own way a lot in life, so it is fitting that I approach my new husband the same way.

I think you have to do what you’re most comfortable with. If you really want your brother to do it, you’ll find a way to make it work. But know that there are a lot of us walking alone if you do go that way! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 8
Member
436 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

I just watched I Love You Man and in it the bride walks down the aisle with two of her bridesmaids on either side. 

Post # 9
Member
2767 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

do you have a brother?  Or another close male relative or friend?  Do you have any kids?

Post # 10
Member
972 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Sorry about your dad. My dad passed when I was 3 and basically my mother took care of us 4 children by herself so i would want her to give me away, I feel like its only fair to her to do that for me.  I was thinking of my older brother but giving someone away means someone who has been there for you and took care of you

Post # 11
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Someone recently posted a photo of a bride who had photo charms attached to the backs of her shoes and she put in photos of her dad there. So her dad did walk her down the aisle. From what I gather she was in the same position as you are. I don’t know if this is something you’d be interested in.

Post # 12
Member
1455 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I was in the same boat, no dad (passed in 2004) and a mom who wouldn’t do it (my mom is painfully shy, I knew she’d do it if I wanted, but she quickly gave other suggestions… so I spared her!) I also have no brothers.

I have TONS of uncles & cousins. I considered two of my cousins- 1. Jason who was very close to my dad. 2. Taylor who lost his dad (my uncle) 20 days before I lost my dad. But they’re young (Jason is the same age as my FI, 27, and Taylor is 19) and my mom made a good point- you don’t want people to think he’s the groom!

I considered two uncles- my favorite uncle I’m closest with, who was GREAT buds with my dad. He’s my mom’s brother and really important to me. The other is my dad’s brother, and my godfather, but he’s a little quieter. Both have a daughter so I worried about stealing their thunder by having their dad walk me down.

I ultimately decided that the best choice was my dad’s brother who is my godfather. He is the most like my dad, physically for sure, and has been there for me through everything- and will really realize the honor of doing it for me. I had my mom talk to him and make sure it was ok with him and his daughter, and he let me know he’d be HONORED! Yay! ๐Ÿ™‚

I would just make a list of options- there is no WRONG choice, it’s just what feels right to you!

Post # 13
Member
7082 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2009

I’m so sorry about the loss of your dad.  I understand about no one being able to fill his shoes.

Walking on your own can be very empowering… I walked halfway alone and it was one of the highlights of my day!

Post # 14
Member
1701 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I was MOH in a friend’s wedding in 2008 – her dad died when we were in high school – so she had her older (and only) brother walk her down.

Post # 15
Member
299 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

My dad passed in 2004 and while I think it is going to be completely tear jerking I think his dad, my grandpa and my mom will be walking me down the aisle.  My grandparents adopted my dad from an abusive mom, so I know that these are my real grandparents and I think he would want me to honor them in this way.

Post # 16
Member
639 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

my uncle is walking me down the aisle (my dad passed in 1998).

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