Walking down the aisle alone &laquo; Weddingbee Boards

1.

Member

1 posts

Wannabee

kfiori23@aol.com October 15, 2013 Foresthill

I've had mixed feelings about whether I should have my dad walk me down the aisle. In his eyes he has always been in the picture. I have an amazing mother who was strong enough to take on both roles, and I dont think that I lost anything by my father not being around. In reality I see him about 2 times a year and if we spend more than a day together we end up fighting. He can be very self centered, loud, obnoxious and inappropriate. My whole family’s approach is "well that’s just how he is". He’s 50 years old with the maturity level of a 17 year old boy. He also announced that he would not be contributing to any part of the wedding and if the weather is bad he wouldn’t be attending. I’m sure he will come, but I’m not sure how to tell him that I'd like to go alone. I would like to have him walk down at some point as I would have my mother and my fiance's parents envolved as well. I have other male family members who I would consider walking me down, but I know my family and there will be constant talk of "Why did she choose him and not me?" I could see from his perspective how that could hurt. Also, I dont plan on having a father/daughter dance. I wish planning a wedding could be more enjoyable and I wouldnt have to have anxiety about whose feelings I'm going to hurt.

4 months ago

2.

Member

2,576 posts

Sugar bee

Wonderstruck September 18, 2011 Detroit, MI

Even though you're sure he will attend, since he has threatened to not attend the wedding, I would just plan on having your mom walk you down. If he questions that you can simply tell him or anyone else that since he wasn't even sure he would attend the wedding you asked your mom to walk you down the aisle. I know having a male family member do it is traditional, but if your mom was the one who raised you I think she deserves the honor. If he then says he'll come and wants to walk you, I'd just tell him that you already asked your mom and don't feel that it would be fair to her to change your mind, she's already excited about it, etc.

4 months ago

3.

Member

627 posts

Busy bee

paigers91 May 14, 2012 Memphis, Tn

I am in that situation, sort of, except I haven't seen my dad in 2 years. (before that, 6 years). The only contact I have with him is on facebook and when my fiance proposed, I sent my dad a message letting him know. It took him 2 months to get back to me and when he did, he said under no circumstances would he allow me to get married. I told him that my fiance asked my mom's blessing and it still didn't appease him. He said that if he refused to give me away, then I can't get married. He also implied that he would stop the wedding if he did show up. So, I told him my brother will walk me down the aisle. Before he got off facebook, he gave me a number to reach him at and my mom called him to talk to him about it. When she got off the phone with him, she told me that she doesn't think he'd actually do anything at the wedding but that she's going to tell her boyfriend and a couple of other people to be on the lookout for it just in case.

Its a bad situation that we are both in. I think you should have the person that you feel has been there for you the most walk you down the aisle. You'll look back on it much more fondly that way.

3 months ago

3.

Member

627 posts

Busy bee

paigers91 May 14, 2012 Memphis, Tn

I am in that situation, sort of, except I haven't seen my dad in 2 years. (before that, 6 years). The only contact I have with him is on facebook and when my fiance proposed, I sent my dad a message letting him know. It took him 2 months to get back to me and when he did, he said under no circumstances would he allow me to get married. I told him that my fiance asked my mom's blessing and it still didn't appease him. He said that if he refused to give me away, then I can't get married. He also implied that he would stop the wedding if he did show up. So, I told him my brother will walk me down the aisle. Before he got off facebook, he gave me a number to reach him at and my mom called him to talk to him about it. When she got off the phone with him, she told me that she doesn't think he'd actually do anything at the wedding but that she's going to tell her boyfriend and a couple of other people to be on the lookout for it just in case.

Its a bad situation that we are both in. I think you should have the person that you feel has been there for you the most walk you down the aisle. You'll look back on it much more fondly that way.

3 months ago