Post # 1
I’ve been lurking for a while and know a lot of people are against this, so let me explain!
I’m going to a school reunion in a couple of weeks. I had a good time at school and made one or two lifelong friends, but there were also a couple of girls that (tried) to make my life hell. They were quite well-off, very materialist, and were nasty to me because I was overweight, from a poorer family and didn’t have the things they had. I have bumped into them since and while things are not like they were at school (we would now say hello and exchange pleasantries), there is obvious tension there.
This will be the first time I’ve seen them since I have been engaged and while I have happily told close friends and family – and even some nice strangers! – that my ring is a moissanite, I just don’t want to tell these two girls because I know they will (very wrongly) feel some kind of catty smugness about it. I met my fiance at school and they were always very horrible about/to both of us, and I just don’t want to give them any kind of ammunition to say that he’s cheap etc. In every day life I am delighted with my ring but my old childhood insecurities are just holding me back from being truthful in this case.
I just want to see what your opinions are in terms of whether these girls will notice and comment with a quick OR close-up look. My ring looks very clear and sparkly in most lights but in a couple of lights (bright daylight especially) it does take on a bit of a light blue tinge. I know that some diamonds do this due to florescence which could be a way of explaining it away to them.
Here are some pictures of it looking its ‘worst’ in terms of colour – please excuse bad manicure, weird hand poses and slightly hair knuckles! I was just trying to catch the colour for the camera!
The reunion is in the afternoonearly evening so they may see it in this light.
Again, I just want to know if these girls will be immediately struck by how much this NOT a diamond.
Thanks in advance bees!
Post # 3
given that it’s blue and not yellow/green, i think it could pass off. especially if these girls don’t know anything about it.
i say rock it. shoulders back, head up striaght and a *sigh, aren’t i lucky?* and they’ll eat it up.
don’t try and justify the blue. don’t say anything. just let them believe what they want to believe.
girls are bitches and sometimes i think it’s nice to knock them down a peg or two.
Post # 4
On the one hand, I totally relate. In fact, one high school girl who tormented me was always referred to as “my mortal enemy” because she tried to beat me up all the time AFTER she stole my first real boyfriend in high school. Anyways, yesterday I found out she was an addict and MIGHT have had a smug grin. Part of me wants to go up to her and be like, “Yo! Crazy lady! Check out how NORMAL I am! I have a husband and a house and I’m going to have babies! I have a job and my life is damned well together! Look at you, who thought you were sooooo cool!”
But the other part of me says that there is no need to because she won’t give a crap and, well, I’m not 16 anymore.
As hard as it is, be the bigger person. Think about it– you and your hubby-to-be are happy and in love. Your life is together. You are starting a new journey on the future (and all their incessent tanning is making them look 10 years older than you). If they ask, “Is that a diamond!?!?!!” (which I doubt they will), give a coy smile and shrug. If they come up and see your ring, I wouldn’t necessarily yell out, “IT’S A DIAMOND!”, but perhaps just let them admire and judge for themselves. If they really are materialistic mean girls, there isn’t a damned thing you can do because even if you were wearing the hope diamond, you know that they would notice another nit-pick detail about you or your husband to hate. God love her, but my sister is a very mean girl, so I know.
Instead of worrying, enjoy your reunion, show off your guy, and have fun seeing old friends!
Post # 5
Who cares? Seriously! Allowing two horrible bitches from high school STILL annoy you to this point is just ridiculous! Be happy and proud of what you have! I wouldn’t give two shits if my engagment ring was a burger ring. They shouldn’t matter to you. Move on with your life.
Post # 6
@Milo: I would say though that just because they *shouldn’t* doesn’t mean they *don’t* and if you can ease your anxieties by doing something then you should just do it and not risk ruining your evening.
Post # 7
I’d suggest not drawing attention to it, but if they ask then just say about how beautiful it is, how much you love it, how much you love your FI and how lucky you are to have him. I agree that a coy smile is a better bet than explicity confirming/denying. Hopefully they won’t be so crass as to ask anyway.
Post # 8
I sincerly hope you dont. Just simply dont say its not a diamond OR that it is.
I think people who try to pass off moissy as diamonds is the biggest reason i dont like moissanites, and am glad to have a diamond regardless of size
Post # 9
@Milo: I agree with you.
OP why do you even care what these girls think? Personally I think that if you have to stoop to lying and playing games then you are just as bad and in essence they have won and that you are as materialist as them.
Aside from that imagine how mortifying it will be if they realise/know that it is not a real diamond but you continue to say it is. You don’t think that wont make people talk about you? Snicker?
High school students behave like this not grown women.
Post # 10
I just wouldn’t bring it up or really draw attention to it at all. I actually doubt I’d talk to people who didn’t like me in the first place. If they do talk to you and they asked to see your ring you could just show them without saying much about it.
Post # 11
I’d just like to clarify that I was asking about my ring, not for opinions on how I should feel. I can only assume that some of you have never been bullied so you don’t know how the experience affects you for the rest of your life. So yes, I probably should just get over it, but unfortunately I’m not at a point in my life yet where I can just shrug off the memories that I have of that time in my life.
I’d just appreciate some opinions on my ring if that’s okay – don’t really need to be made to feel worse about something I already feel silly for worrying about.
Post # 12
It’s a mystery to me why you care what these shrews think, but surely you know you are under no legal or moral obligation to disclose your ring material.
If one of them is so declasse as to actually ask if it’s a real diamond, give her a sniff and haughty glare then glide away, softly laughing to yourself at the poor upbringing of some people.
You could be practicing haughty sniff and glare instead of fretting. You’ll feel more powerful.
Post # 14
@RL1985: I dont think unless they are experts they will notice, and to be honest, if they have that opinion of you and are that catty anyway, they’d think a reeal diamond was a cz because they wanted to think that. I say rock it, and stand tall- it really doesnt matter what people like that think of you.
Hopefully they’ll just be jealous you have a lovely FI and are happy..
Post # 13
@RL1985: Fair enough- yes I would know your ring was not a real diamond and if these girls are materialistic as you say then I would assume that they too will know.
Post # 15
@sassy411: haha thanks for this – i think I’ll get practising!
By the way, I’m not planning on going around spouting the made up specifics of my ‘diamond’, I’m just not going to say anything at all about it. I just didn’t want these horrible girls that treated me so badly all those years ago to make a nasty comment that would ruin my evening, and the point of my post was whether I should expect them to or not.
Post # 16
@j_jaye: +1 i say they could tell too
flaunt being happy instead