Wanting your future daughter to wear your gown

posted 3 years ago in Dress
  • poll: What are your wedding dress aspirations for your future daughter?
    I hope my daughter will wear my dress and I wore my mom's : (0 votes)
    I hope my daughter will wear my dress but I chose my own dress : (23 votes)
    12 %
    I want my daughter to pick her own dress but I wore my mom's : (1 votes)
    1 %
    I want my daughter to pick her own dress just as I chose my own dress : (161 votes)
    87 %
  • Post # 3
    9412 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    @Honey-Bee:  I’ve always wondered about this too. You know what they say about the best laid plans. I want the most use out of my dress as possible and the best pictures we can possibly get. We will be doing a TTD shoot in Jamaica and I will not be holding onto my dress. I hate dust collectors and who is to say I will even have a daughter? If I do, why would I assume she wants to wear an old, out of date dress? I sure wouldn’t.

    Logically it isn’t there for me. I’d rather use it now than pointless hold onto something that chances are will never be worn again. I don’t believe in “maybes” or saving stuff I don’t need.

    Post # 5
    1229 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2012 - Chateau Briand

    My mother did not have a big wedding but if she did, I probably would have worn her dress. She had impeccable taste and being that she passed prior to my wedding, it would have meant a lot to me. I did not intend on saving my dress but DH wanted me to and I figure by the time our future daughter gets married, it would be a vintage vera wang so maybe that would catch her attention 🙂 

    Post # 6
    3199 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @Honey-Bee:  i think i’m indifferent, but i may feel differently when i have a daughter, we’ll see. i plan on keeping mine to display and if my future daughter wants to wear it, then great. but i won’t push her into it.

    my parents are divorced and my mom is a grade A bee-yotch, so i wouldn’t have worn her gown. it was super 80’s anyway.

    Post # 8
    582 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

     I won’t wear my mom’s dress, and I don’t expect that my future children will want to wear mine. I probably woulndn’t even offer it unless they asked.  Because realistically, styles can drastically change, and I would never want to put that kind of emotional pressure/stress on them.


    Post # 9
    1526 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @Honey-Bee:  I would have worn my moms dress if it was the dress she wore when she married my dad.  But it wasnt – the white wedding dress my mom has is from her first wedding to a different guy. 

    Post # 11
    2562 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Oh dear lord, wedding dresses are going to be like elaborate HOLOGRAMS by then haha!
    If you have dress regret, you can get it re-programmed to be a different dress. Though I’m sure if you wanted the option to wear your mother’s dress as your hologram, it could be arranged.

    Alternatively, fashion will take it’s normal cicular course and everyone will be dressing in the Victorian style again. Showing ankles will be a no-no, necks will be covered, and there will be cameo pins everywhere.

    Either way, not a terrible scenario, but neither really works with my wedding dress.

    Post # 12
    9137 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    @Honey-Bee:  I love my mom but I haven’t fit into her wedding dress since I was 12 because she was so tiny and I am super curvy.  Plus, since her dress is from the 70s, the style and material are pretty outdated.

    My FMIL offered her dress for me to wear but it’s an early 90s Princess Di style dress with the big train and poofy sleeves.  We’re having a casual beachfront ceremony so it doesn’t really fit into our wedding.  Plus, she was horrified when I asked if I could get it cut up and redesigned with a more modern dress pattern.  She would rather it sit untouched in a closet than be cut up and reused.

    I don’t know anybody who has been able to wear their mom’s wedding dress so although I know it happens, it’s pretty few and far between to make it worth preserving your dress in anything more than wedding photos.

    David Tutera had a great episode where the MOB totally wanted the bride to wear her dress but it was awful.  (Heaven & Earth Bride from Season 6.)  The bride was too terrified to tell her mother she didn’t want to wear her mom’s dress and another sister elopped to Vegas just so she could avoid wearing the awful dress.  What we think is the height of fashion today will probably be a frightening throw-back by the time our daughters are old enough to wear our dresses.  I plan to donate mine to a worth cause like Brides Against Breast Cancer.

    Post # 13
    2419 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Given that my mother was about as different in shape and height to me as possible, it’s a very good job she didn’t harbour such hopes! She was a beautiful woman but about 5 inches shorter than me and rather wider.

    If I’d held onto a wedding dress I’d have been equally disappointed since neither of my sons are interested in wearing a dress.

    So yes, sweet idea but not really one worth holding onto a dress for unless you have plenty of storage space and are quite prepared to have any eventual daughters that would be interested in wearing it!

    Post # 14
    1902 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    My mother lost her wedding dress so I was always disappointed as a little girl that I wasn’t able to see it.  I was able to fit into one of her three cheongsams and wore it at my Chinese banquet rehearsal dinner.  I plan to keep my dress and my daughter will have the option to wear it or at least look at it. 

    Post # 16
    2250 posts
    Buzzing bee

    @Honey-Bee:  I chose a dress that looked a lot like the one my grandmother and mom wore thinking that it was timeless, and a future daughter or niece may want to wear it. I preserved it for that very reason, but later had the epiphany that at 5’1, its very unlikely that my dress will work for a future child (husband is 6′ so no shorty). I’m totally fine with whatever, but I thought it would be nice to give the option of that or wearing my veil. 

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