"Was it planned?"

posted 3 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
440 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Treejewel19:  I think it’s incredibly rude.  People seem to lose their minds about what is appropriate when it comes to talking to pregnant women.  Why would they want to know?  If it wasn’t planned then what are they going to do with that information exactly? My first thought is that they would use it as gossip.  I’m bracing myself for people’s reactions when we announce in a few weeks so I’m wondering what your reaction to this question was?

 

Post # 4
Member
4523 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think its rude and most def inappropriate! 

Post # 5
Member
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Oh my, so rude!

Post # 6
Hostess
15072 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Who asks that kind of question!? That so rude. You’re not being old fashioned and it’s not appropriate . Ugh, why do people think that every intimate detail of everyone’s lives is open for discussion? 

Post # 7
Member
2258 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Treejewel19:  I’m with you! I was so surprised when not just one, but about 6 people, asked me “was it a surprise?” or “Congratulations! Sorry, I mean, should I say congratulations? Are you happy about this?” (seriously, someone said this) or “were you guys trying?”. Honestly?!? People think it’s appropriate to ask those things? I certainly would never dream of asking anything similar!

Post # 8
Member
3119 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Yes it’s rude!! It’s like they’re asking about your sex life (and really, aren’t they?)…ugh. I’ve asked some of my best girlfriends that, but only people I’m comfortable talking about their sex life with anyway haha.

Glad you seemed to have taken it in stride, because I don’t know that people will ever become more tactful.

Congrats on sharing your news!

Post # 9
Member
683 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@Treejewel19:  I think it is extremely rude!  For some reason, people seem to think you can say anything to a pregnant woman!

Post # 11
Member
1883 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@Treejewel19:  So inappropriate! They were way out of line. I might have called them out for rude behavior (which I don’t do often, but it was absolutely none of their business). 

It wouldn’t bother me if it was super close family or friends, but if they were super close, they’d probably already know if it was planned or unplanned already. 

Post # 12
Member
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@Treejewel19:  It’s incredibly rude to say the least but it’s honestly the first thought that pops into my mind when friends who are younger than 30 announce a pregnancy.  But I would never have the audacity to actually ask.

Post # 13
Member
1463 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Wow, so rude.  I wouldn’t be afraid to state that, either.

Post # 14
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I nearly went into shock the first time someone asked me that. I literally went “…What?” I was CONVINCED I had misheard them!

Post # 15
Member
6067 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2012

@Treejewel19:  Very rude and also…just plain strange!

I’m glad you got a better, more appropriate response from others.

Post # 16
Member
1830 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I could understand someone asking that question to a teenager maybe but in any other circumstances that is a very rude question to ask. 

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