(Closed) Was this wrong of them? Or am I crazy?

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
1323 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

were they closer to your ex? It would have been nice of them to extend you an invitation but they are not obligated to do so.

Post # 3
Member
434 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Yes, no one owes you an invitation to their wedding. You have no idea what their wedding budget was, or how many family members they had to invite. Get over it.

Post # 4
Member
969 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

If you haven’t been involved in their lives for years, then I can understand why you weren’t invited. I can understand why you would want to go, but if you were only finding out about their engagement, wedding etc through Facebook… I would think that maybe you weren’t close enough to them to invite.

Post # 5
Member
13890 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I don’t see why one should get an invite just because they happen to introduce the couple and then “see them a couple times”  after they got engaged.  It doesn’t really sound like you are that close to them.

Post # 6
Member
760 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Our Backyard/Steakhouse

TheAnonyMouse:  You went for coffee with them once, and saw them around town and that means you’re close enough to go to their wedding?  Sorry, but you are not owed an invitation to any wedding – ever – except your own.  While it’s lovely that you set them up, they may no longer feel close enough to you to warrant inviting you.

 

Post # 7
Member
45387 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

If you don’t see them on a regular basis, I doubt you would be close enough to make the cut for the invitation list.

Post # 8
Member
7879 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

TheAnonyMouse:  Sorry, but no they don’t owe you an invite. Perhaps it was a small wedding and they could only invite closest friends. If the last person on the list was either you, or a closer friend, they were right to invite the closer friend.

It would be immature of them to not invite you because of your ex, but ultimately it is their decision.

Post # 9
Member
3904 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

TheAnonyMouse:  Honestly, you weren’t best friends with these people. My friend is inviting the girl who introduced her to her now FI, but I was definitely surprised to hear she was invited. They haven’t seen or spoken to her in months! Maybe their budget did not allow it and even if it did, you aren’t close with them, so why would you expect to be invited. Introducing them was great for them, but they don’t owe you anything. 

Post # 11
Member
8979 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I don’t “do” obligation. It’s great that you introduced them and you should get warm fuzzy feelings that you were able to connect two people who fell so deeply in love, but I don’t think it’s right to expect someone to feel obligated to invite anyone regardless of the role they had in their relationship.

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Post # 13
Member
434 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

So they chose your ex over you. That happens, unfortunately. I wouldn’t give it another thought.

Post # 14
Member
2265 posts
Buzzing bee

Did you want to go because you were honestly good friends with them and wanted to witness their joyful union or did you want to go so you could get recognition for being the one who set them up?

Post # 15
Member
725 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

TheAnonyMouse:  but how often had you seen them or spent time with them pre-engagement? 

It would be a nice gesture to invite all sorts of people to my wedding, but there has to be a line drawn somewhere. 

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