(Closed) We aren’t even married yet, and you want to talk babies?!

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2066 posts
Buzzing bee

Tell her that you and FI want to enjoy being married (and perhaps living on your own) for a while before having kids.  If that doesn’t work, be more direct and explain that you want to focus on your wedding, not on possible future children. 

Post # 4
Member
461 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I agree w/ texasmeredith.  I can see how it would be frustrating because you want totally experience both things!

But, I’m soooo excited for babies (in a few years!  We’re really young!)

Lol.

Post # 6
Member
461 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

Yeah, sometimes (depending on her personality) it’s easier to just ignore it and always change the topic back on track, but I know if we were a bit older and my FMIL were like that I’d just have my fiance tell her to stop!  That’s just her personality, she would not be offended!  Not knowing your FMIL, I didn’t want to say that to you though!

Post # 8
Member
1371 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I think it’s pretty common for parents to be pushy about your future child-bearing.  I know it’s frustrating, but on the positive, at least you know she likes you and wants you to have her grandchildren!  🙂  We get various comments from all parents.  My mom, who is almost 58, has already bought us hats and mittens for our future children (shoot me).  His mom on the other hand said we can’t have children now because she’s “too young”, although she’s 51 this year.  And just last weekend she said that we can’t have kids now, but we “HAVE TO” have children eventually because that’s part of life.  Uterus hi-jacking much?!  I just ignore it and my fiance and I laugh about all of them.

Post # 10
Member
2027 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

My MIL was pretty pushy before we were married, but now that we are, she’s shut her mouth. I think she’s assuming if she never brings it up, it’ll happen faster. My SIl tells me all sorts of things she’s planning, though, that she’s probably too scared to tell me. Like she has clothes already and names picked out, and toys and a hope chest for us. I think it’s sweet, but pretty funny that she’s hiding it from us. 

No one really asks us anymore because we’ve been together for 8 years and always shut everyone down if they bring it up. I think everyone assumes we’ll remain childless, but in actuality, we’re just really private about the issue. 

I think ignoring it works the best to deter prying parents. Like I said, no one asks us anymore. 

Post # 11
Member
241 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

the thing is you want to know that your on the same page.. myself I cant wait and either can me FI we thought of bady name already but we know we’re going to wait to have a kid…

Post # 12
Member
2201 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I’m personally more upset about what she wants to buy the “grandbabies” first. Um, hell. It’s my babies – I’ll buy them their first dolls and cribs and you are not putting my boys in sailor suits! You’ve had your kids, these are mine! And I’ll have them when I’ve decided to have them!

Gah!

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