- Blog
- Bios
- Boards
- Classifieds
- DIY
- Gallery
- Vendor Reviews
- Shop Weddingbee
Weddingbee boards
I know this is horrible, but does the jeweler offer any financing?
Is there any way you can get an odd job or money elsewhere and surprise him with it if you get enough money?
Worse case, you plan on doing an "upgrade" at some point.
Well, while I know it's tough and you and your FI will be bummed, I feel that there is nothing about our wedding that I would select that would jeopardize our financial future such as a down payment/security deposit. Would you rather have a place to live or this particular band? The thing is, you might end up purchasing something that isn't your favorite now but once the dust settles from the wedding, you can both start stocking some money away each pay period to go toward the rings you've originally wanted.
Have you looked online to see if there are any rings that are similar that he likes?
I got FI's ring at Larson Jewelers and have nothing be awesome things to say about them!
For my ring, we just focused on getting an amazing diamond and went as cheap as possible on the setting with the thought that we would eventually upgrade. Maybe you can do that for now with your wedding bands, I don't see anything wrong with living below your means for now and on an anniversarry going out and getting something amazing.
How about taking money out of the wedding budget for it? Since the ring is really the most lasting physical thing about getting married, I think that should be a top priority.
Have you checked out overstock? We got FH's band there a tungston for $43! at the store around here it was $300-450!
We went through this too....Mr. L wanted a really fancy band with diamond inlay, but with the crazy cost we couldn't swing it...we ended up going another route and he finally found something he liked!
Def check online...here are some great deals if you do your homework.
@caszos: we're already financing. :( And I we both work more than 40 hours a week. I'm exploring upgrade options right now.
@stephinPA: Obviously, having a place to live is our priority. We're not in favor of screwing ourselves over to pay for this ring...I was mostly looking to see if anyone else has had to work around this, or suggestions on how to talk to my FI about it. He's not an unreasonable guy; I was just frustrated with the situation and looking to see what other people thought.
@SanDiegoAli: Thanks for the link! We'll check it out.
@mishelleez: wow! I had no idea Overstock had that kind of selection!
@locket: I'm glad you guys found something that Mr. Locket loves. :) Hopefully we will too!
I dont know what your budget is but i just found this one with 1/2 ct for a little over $600 http://www.overstock.com/Jewelry-Watches/14k-Gold-Mens-1-2ct-TDW-Diamond-Band/3432992/product.html
Perhaps you two could get a more affordable ring right now and upgrade his ring on your one year anniversary - many couples do this with a woman's engagement ring so I don't know why it couldn't be done for a man's wedding band.
FH also wanted a ring with a little more bling, but didn't want to spend more than $700 right now. So, we got him a tungsten ring with three little diamonds for $450, and plan to get him the ring he wants in a few years. (of course, he still says that my ring is the only one I'm ever getting . . . since he could upgrade his numerous times before reaching the cost of mine)
But Overstock has a lot of great options with small bling to them for under $100.
Def try overstock.com got FH's band there for $320 at the jeweler for the same ring they wanted $1,700 took it in there to have in inspected without saying where we got it and they thought we bought it from them at a different location.
How does FI feel about a temporary ring? There are some really nice ones out there - and then you can upgrade later (say, on your 1-year anniversary).
I was in a similar boat. The ring FI fell in love with was triple our budget for it, and we just decided to go for it. He wasn't willing to wait and really wanted that ring on the day of. I ended up shuffling around some expenses and ultimately will be putting a few wedding expenses on a credit card because of it. Not ideal, by any means, but it worked for us.
OVERSTOCK! I got FI's ring there for 65. I found one at the jeweler nearly identical to it, the only thing different was that at the jeweler's the middle wasn't a brushed finish, for $300.
@MsBlueberryBee: We're definitely going to go trolling at Overstock! It seems to be the place to go. :)
@oracle: Shuffling is also an option. We found some one that FI liked on Overstock (we glanced at it real quick on our lunch break) but if we can't find something that we like there, we're going to go the jeweler where we bought by e-ring to see if there is a way to make it work. So we'll see what happens.
@Roosterschic: For sure! I mentioned it earlier, but I had no idea Overstock sold wedding jewelry. FI and I looked it over very briefly earlier today and plan to go back and dig into it a little later.
What if you used your engagement ring as your wedding band and he got his band? Kind of seems fair to me. And then if you can financially at your anniversary, you get your band.
I would make the choice either wait on larger purchases (house, car etc) until after you've paid off the ring, or get a cheaper ring for you and/or him. You can always upgrade (guys too!) in a few years! Just b/c you don't have it now doesn't mean you can't ever have it!
Look at alternative (cheaper) metals like titanium--and consider doing a 25 pts instead of 50 pts on the rock?
I also like bamboo's idea-let him get his band, and forego your own band (or get a less expensive wedding band). That way you won't have to feel guilty about the beautiful engagement ring you have-while your FH "settles" for his band.
The band my FH wants is about $2k, and since I got a beautiful engagement ring that set him back a few bucks, I decided that I would do whatever it took to get his band for him--even if it meant downgrading a couple of flower arrangements or shaving off a couple hundred dollars from my shoe budget--but that's also because I feel like most of the wedding day is centered around what would make me happy--so I want something for him to be happy for too.
We were facing a similar problem but our long engagement helped a lot in terms of having time to save up. However we had our heart set on an engagement ring and wedding bands that were still out of budget (because we weren't going to dump all our savings into the wedding). My SO really liked a band that had diamonds since he is already wearing platinum ring on his other hand. We ended up shopping until we found a jeweler that could do the bands and engagement ring we wanted within our budget also instead of platinum I got white gold.
However, we also bought a set of cheap silver/tungstein bands that we were planning to use as our temp wedding bands in case we couldn't get our favorite bands in time for the wedding. They were like around $5-$10 and looked really nice. We were really planning to wear that for another 1-2 years until we had enough budget for our favorite rings (we didn't want to compromise or get an upgrade later) luckily my 3.5 year engagement worked out well in terms of financing.
Best of luck!
How about a white sapphire or cz in the band he wants temporarily. Then set a real diamond in on your anniversary. If you post pics of the band your FI wants maybe we can offer better suggestions. I would only buy a diamond in person, not online, because diamonds of similar cut and clarity can look quite different depending on the quality of the cut. We got FI's band from QuiltedPony on etsy - he was great, not expensive, and is in Oregon if you want a personal consultation.
I second (third?) the option to either use your engagement ring as a wedding ring, or get yourself an inexpensive band. I wear only one ring, and I know many other women who do the same.
Alternately, do you have old jewelry you could have melted down to make him the ring he wants? Broken necklaces, orphaned earrings are both good candidates... Do you have any family jewelry that is unloved that you could either take stones from, or again, melt down the gold?
I third (or fourth??) the idea of using your engagement ring as a wedding band and taking that money that would have been for your wedding band and putting it towards his band. :)
why dont you do a less expensive one just for the wedding and then upgrade for the 1st anniversary together!!!
You must log in to post.
| Visit our sister sites | eHarmony Online Dating |
eHarmony Advice Dating Advice |
Project Wedding Wedding Songs |
JustMommies Pregnancy Calendar |
Create the honeymoon of your dreams.
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| MissBoPeep | 94 |
| ndreighton | 77 |
| hisgoosiegirl | 56 |
| beargoose | 55 |
| Mrs.KMM | 46 |
| akp0702 | 42 |
| BetterSherm | 42 |
| MrsBlueSeptember | 41 |
| MrsPom | 37 |
| Beckster329 | 37 |
| User | Posts Today |
|---|---|
| JustLove25 | 29 |
| jcent | 18 |
| GelaMac | 17 |
| MerryWidow | 14 |
| mylittleviolett | 13 |
| lahaina22 | 10 |
| halli | 9 |
| capergrrl | 8 |
| Mrs.danish | 8 |
| lilsweetie | 7 |
My fiance and I have run into a sticky situation when it comes to his wedding band.
When we went browsing for our bands (we haven't purchased them yet) he fell in love with a white gold band with a 1/2 carat diamond inlay. My FI isn't really a jewelry person, but he's been really excited about getting to have his own wedding band, and he likes the diamond one particularly (because it looks the most "officially married" lol).
Over the last month or two we've encountered a lot of unforseen expenses, and it's really taken a toll on our savings. Yesterday after meeting with the jeweler, we realized that making a down payment on the bands would seriously jeopardize our ability to make a security deposit or move in together after the wedding. We simply can not throw down the money right now, and we're already financing as it is.
I feel awful about this, because it means sometime today we have to have a talk about how we can't afford the ring he loves, and has been looking forward to wearing for months. When I take into consideration that my e-ring was almost the same price -- and I'm wearing it -- it makes me feel even worse.
Does anyone have any suggestions? I'm a little at a loss as to how to approach this.