Post # 1
My fiance and I have run into a sticky situation when it comes to his wedding band.
When we went browsing for our bands (we haven’t purchased them yet) he fell in love with a white gold band with a 1/2 carat diamond inlay. My FI isn’t really a jewelry person, but he’s been really excited about getting to have his own wedding band, and he likes the diamond one particularly (because it looks the most “officially married” lol).
Over the last month or two we’ve encountered a lot of unforseen expenses, and it’s really taken a toll on our savings. Yesterday after meeting with the jeweler, we realized that making a down payment on the bands would seriously jeopardize our ability to make a security deposit or move in together after the wedding. We simply can not throw down the money right now, and we’re already financing as it is.
I feel awful about this, because it means sometime today we have to have a talk about how we can’t afford the ring he loves, and has been looking forward to wearing for months. When I take into consideration that my e-ring was almost the same price — and I’m wearing it — it makes me feel even worse.
Does anyone have any suggestions? I’m a little at a loss as to how to approach this.
Post # 3
I know this is horrible, but does the jeweler offer any financing?
Is there any way you can get an odd job or money elsewhere and surprise him with it if you get enough money?
Worse case, you plan on doing an “upgrade” at some point.
Post # 4
Well, while I know it’s tough and you and your FI will be bummed, I feel that there is nothing about our wedding that I would select that would jeopardize our financial future such as a down payment/security deposit. Would you rather have a place to live or this particular band? The thing is, you might end up purchasing something that isn’t your favorite now but once the dust settles from the wedding, you can both start stocking some money away each pay period to go toward the rings you’ve originally wanted.
Post # 5
Have you looked online to see if there are any rings that are similar that he likes?
I got FI’s ring at Larson Jewelers and have nothing be awesome things to say about them!
Post # 6
For my ring, we just focused on getting an amazing diamond and went as cheap as possible on the setting with the thought that we would eventually upgrade. Maybe you can do that for now with your wedding bands, I don’t see anything wrong with living below your means for now and on an anniversarry going out and getting something amazing.
Post # 7
How about taking money out of the wedding budget for it? Since the ring is really the most lasting physical thing about getting married, I think that should be a top priority.
Post # 8
Have you checked out overstock? We got FH’s band there a tungston for $43! at the store around here it was $300-450!
Post # 9
- Wedding: September 2010 - Heron Hill Winery
We went through this too….Mr. L wanted a really fancy band with diamond inlay, but with the crazy cost we couldn’t swing it…we ended up going another route and he finally found something he liked!
Post # 10
Def check online…here are some great deals if you do your homework.
Post # 11
@caszos: we’re already financing. 🙁 And I we both work more than 40 hours a week. I’m exploring upgrade options right now.
@stephinPA: Obviously, having a place to live is our priority. We’re not in favor of screwing ourselves over to pay for this ring…I was mostly looking to see if anyone else has had to work around this, or suggestions on how to talk to my FI about it. He’s not an unreasonable guy; I was just frustrated with the situation and looking to see what other people thought.
@SanDiegoAli: Thanks for the link! We’ll check it out.
Post # 12
@mishelleez: wow! I had no idea Overstock had that kind of selection!
@locket: I’m glad you guys found something that Mr. Locket loves. 🙂 Hopefully we will too!
Post # 13
Post # 14
Perhaps you two could get a more affordable ring right now and upgrade his ring on your one year anniversary – many couples do this with a woman’s engagement ring so I don’t know why it couldn’t be done for a man’s wedding band.
Post # 15
Post # 16
FH also wanted a ring with a little more bling, but didn’t want to spend more than $700 right now. So, we got him a tungsten ring with three little diamonds for $450, and plan to get him the ring he wants in a few years. (of course, he still says that my ring is the only one I’m ever getting . . . since he could upgrade his numerous times before reaching the cost of mine)
But Overstock has a lot of great options with small bling to them for under $100.