(Closed) We don’t have many friends : /

posted 8 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
Member
194 posts
Blushing bee

Yes I definately know what you mean. All of my friends are away at college, and all of his friends come to the house all the time, but they don’t go out with us because they are single and I think they feel like the third wheel. If they do ask us to come out, it’s last minute and we can’t find a sitter. I’ve recently met some new friends at a program I have my son in, but that doesn’t really benefit my FI. And it seems like the couples we do form relationships with always break up and we get stuck in the middle. It gets boring sometimes, but at least I have my FI.

Post # 4
Member
599 posts
Busy bee

Oh I know how you feel. All of our friends are still in the “lets go out, get drunk, and stay out all night” phase. And we are much more into dinner and movies. Makes it hard to hang out with people.

Post # 5
Member
440 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Get a Wii! Play board games!

We’re the same… and especially now that we’ve moved our friends are anywhere from a 1 hour to 5 hour trek away! We keep talking about joining couply things… like a wine tasting course or cooking class in town, but we’re apparently not terribly motivated! 😉

Post # 6
Hostess
18646 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I know how you feel.  In our new town, most of the people we know are couples from his work.  They have weekly outings but we haven’t made it to one in over a month now.  Definetly gets pretty lonely sometimes!

Post # 7
Member
300 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Why don’t you ladies try taking a class with your husbands/fiances?  You might meet other couples there.  My fiance and I are both super-outgoing, so we have met other couples to hang out with in these types of settings.  When we went to Mexico last year, we made friends with a couple on their honeymoon and went to dinner with them.  Now we hang out with them every so often since they live in the next town over.  I think as long as you do activities where you are surrounded by other people (not necessarily a club, could be a class, volunteer work, church, pub quiz/trivia night, etc.), you will meet other couples.  Good luck!

Post # 8
Member
7976 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Wine + board games = instant fun

Seriously, it sounds old personish, but it got my roommates and I through college… having people over (other couples, groups, whatever!), cracking a bottle of wine, and playing board games is a GREAT way to make (better) friends. You get to relax, converse, play, laugh… it’s great!

Post # 9
Member
631 posts
Busy bee

May I also recommend http://www.meetup.org?  It is a site that serves as a “meeting point” for various groups. I know chicago has a “couples” group and it seems like a great way to meet other couples.  Just a suggestion!

Post # 10
Member
865 posts
Busy bee

My boyfriend and I spend the majority of the time just us.  at least you guys hang out together with friends occasionally.  my guy will go out with his friends once in awhile and I’m left at home, boo.  I’d go hang out with my friends but I’m also not very social so I don’t have many and the ones I do have are always busy.

Post # 11
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We just moved across the country to California, and we pretty much don’t know anyone here.  Still, we’re trying to keep things interesting… and we’ve gotten back in touch with some college friends who are living out here.  We’ve had more than our fair share of Saturday nights in with a Netflix movie and a bottle of wine though. 

Post # 12
Member
2008 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I can definitely sympathize!  Although for me, it’s less that I don’t have any couple-type friends and more that they all live at least 40 miles away.  I moved here 2 years ago and I still haven’t really made any friends.  My husband’s friends are all very cool but not so much the couple type.  I’m also definitely lacking in the girlfriends’ department.  A huge part of it for us is a lack of funds.  It would be really easy to say let’s go out for dinner or drinks but the budget’s not very forgiving.  Oh, and the fact that we currently live in a house that we’re not particularly proud of.  Once we buy our (hopefully) new place we’ll be able to host a lot more. 

Post # 13
Member
6598 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

If you really want to develop couple friends to hang out with – is there a particular couple you guys mesh with when you go out with work friends? If so – ask them if they want to come over for dinner and set a date – then you could advance the friendship and maybe get into their personal group of friends!

Post # 14
Member
3871 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I know how you feel.  Me and DH moved out to Seattle a year ago.  We left Philly where most of our friends and family were.  It’s been definitely an adjustment.

I signed up for meetup.com and it’s nice but with work and with me getting my masters part time now. I don’t have a lot of time.  DH is a social guy when he is around his friends but since he’s come out here, he hasn’t been in the mood.  I keep telling him to go to a meetup and meet people.  But he doesn’t want to.

I’m not a bar person, (I used to be but now that i don’t really drink anymore, going to bars gets a bit boring. )  So we don’t really go out any more.

We did the whole board game thing and playing cards and that was really fun. We have wii and we put that on when we remember.  We got a dog so at least when either one of us is at work we arn’t home alone.  We go to movies a lot and try to go out to dinner when we can.

Then we stopped because of wedding planning but here we are married and sometimes it’s a bit depressing that we don’t have any friends out here.

Oh and as for work friends.  They  have this thing called the Seattle Freeze.  People are nice but they stop short of asking you to come over on the weekends to hang out.  They just dont do that out here.   Yeah, so that why I do meetup.com when I can. 

 

Post # 15
Member
2703 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

TOTALLY know how you feel.

it’s hard to get together with friends that are in town, let alone the ones that live out of state.  i have a close circle of gf’s but we are all scattered. and neither the FI or I like going out to the bars/clubbing anymore. esp when we have a fridge full of drinks and a hot tub in the back yard.

LOL.

 

most of his friends are already married with kids. mine are single or in effed up relationships.

 

so we’re alone in this boat right now.

 

we get by here and there… spending time with in town friends when we can, we spend a lot of time with our parents… and our dogs def keep us busy…we’re thinking of joining a bowling league (nerdy?) but FFIL used to own a bowling alley and FI used to be really good… so we’re gonna try to break out of our (non)social habits and get out more!

Post # 16
Member
3285 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

totally can relate – wanna hang out with us?  =)

really though, i have lots of friends and acquaintances from work; i’ve lived here in orlando longer than hubby – he moved here spring of last year, and has less friends and etc., so we do a lot together or with my friends…

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