We don't want gift registries. What to do?

posted 3 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 3
3280 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Just don’t make a registry! People will get the hint:)

Post # 4
42157 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@MissDahlia08:  If anyone hosts a shower for you, it is helpful for the guests to have a registry.

If you have the basics, you could choose to create a small registry of upgrades that would suit yourlifestyle- china, crystal, silverware, a new gas BBQ etc.

If you really don’t need/want physical gifts, don’t register. It is preferable to creating any kind of “we want cash fund.”

Most people do gift the couple to express their best wishes. Most of these people will give cash if  there is no registry and they obviously are aware of your living situation.

Post # 5
845 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

@MissDahlia08:  Just don’t create a registry – but people will either pick a gift themselves or give you money. People feel weird usually about not giving a gift. I used to feel weird about registries too but I realized most people are gonna give you a gift anyway and prefer to buy off a registry so they don’t buy you the same thing as someone else. If you do register, just include upgrade items – i.e. new bedding, towels, dishes, etc. None of that stuff lasts forever so you will need new things eventually anyway!

Post # 6
3016 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

Maybe you could do some kind of charity thing?

According to the Bee, if you don’t register, people lwill give you money. If you don’t want the money for yourselves, maybe you can have a little corner at the wedding with a box for the charity or something like that. 

Post # 7
1566 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@MissDahlia08:  If you don’t want gifts, simply don’t make a registry. If you know that you’ll probably have a shower or something, then registering for the type of gifts you prefer gives people an idea of what you like.

Do you like playing games?

Do you need new towels/sheets?

Is there something big you’ve been saving for like a large appliance? If so, then there are some registries that will break the cost of large ticket items into smaller pieces so that people contribute to your new (refrigerator).


Otherwise, you can register for a charity if you really don’t want money or gifts, and wish to give people an outlet that will be something you like.

Post # 8
851 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MissDahlia08:  some people are not comfortable giving money as a present and a registry can help these individuals out……


Post # 9
455 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@MissDahlia08:  “Is there a tactful way to say you can give gifts if you want but they aren’t necessary?”

There’s no need to say it because gifts are never necessary (despite popular misconception). Unfortunately, it is impolite for the host to mention gifts even in the context of “no gifts please.” 

Don’t make a registry and if anyone asks you can tell them “Your presence is present enough.” You can advise your close friends/family that if anyone asks them, they can say “Really. They don’t want gifts. Really!” But only if the guest asks first.

Post # 11
851 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MissDahlia08:  I think I may have misunderstood……

Most people that attend a wedding like to bring a gift.  I think they might feel weird coming empty handed.

I would create a small registry at a store you like….. if you end up not wanting any of the gifts then you can return them for a store gift card that can be used at a later date

Post # 14
2878 posts
Sugar bee

@MissDahlia08:  Word-to-mouth would be your better option. I think if your guests don’t find the registry info anywhere, they’re supposed to go registry-hunting and ask your relatives where it is, so your relatives can answer to them. However, I think it’s a bit ungrateful to tell people ”no gifts”, because some people will want to offer you something, and they’d like to know what you want. I know if I had to take time searching for a registry and calling your mom inquiring about it, I’d be offended to be told ”just don’t give anything”. In this precise circumstance, I’d like your mom to tell me you didn’t need anything for the household, but anything that can serve for couple’s projects and activities (to me, it means either money or gift cards) would be appreciated. Because that’s the only purpose of giving, really : hoping the receiver will appreciate the gesture and be pleased by the gift. I think even if you don’t need anything, you should be gracious about people wanting to please you and be honest about what you’d like to receive.


Post # 16
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 1988

@MissDahlia08:  REI has a gift registry! Great place to register.


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