Post # 1
My fiance and I went to the jewelry store yesterday and walked out with our wedding bands. We couldn’t pass up a great sale… and I found my matching wedding band to my engagement ring, which hAs been discontinued.
Anyways… we still have until next april to get married. As soon as we got in the car.. my fiance put his ring on. He wont take it off. But we’re not married? I asked him why he was wearing it and he said he liked it on. (I guess I can’t really complain about that.) BUT WE’RE NOT MARRIED yet! The ring symbolizes our wedding day and I feel like it’s cheating.
What to do? How can I get him to take it off without hurting his feelings?
Also… did anyone else wear their rings before the wedding?
Post # 3
Honestly, I think he should take it off. It symbolizes your marriage and should have that sentimental/emotional connection with the wedding day. Also, it will confuse people to see him wearing a ring bc they will probably think he’s already married.He has his whole life ahead of him to wear it, so I dont see a reason he can’t wait a year.
Post # 4
I got my fiance an engagement ring that he wears daily, he’ll switch over to his wedding band on our wedding day.
Post # 5
@cstarkwe: personally, I woudn’t want my Fiance to wear his wedding band before we were married. I guess just try to explain to him why you don’t want him to wear it yet (if you don’t).
Post # 6
@cstarkwe: What about getting him a cheaper right hand ring?
Post # 7
Get him an e-ring or call that his e ring and find a different wedding band. I would not want my Fiance to wear his wedding band before the big day
Post # 8
I don’t see what the big deal is… I am considering buying my SO’s wedding band early and having him wear it as an engagement ring if he wants to. I understand that wedding bands symbolize, well, a marriage, but why can’t a couple use it to symbolize the commitment that “officially” begins with an engagement?
Post # 9
I say get him a different ring to wear as an engagement ring, and get him to take that one off.
Post # 10
I agree with @azure: – totally not a big deal that he wants to wear it. On the contrary, I would take it as a very good sign.
OP, if you’re really uncomfortable with it, maybe you could ask him to wear it on his right hand instead of his left. Then he can start wearing it on his left hand after the wedding. I think this is what they do in some countries in Europe, like Germany. Except there I think the hands are reversed.
Post # 11
i guess i dont see the big deal. i mean women get to wear a ring at the start fo the engagement and we get to contine wearing it after we get married. if it bugs you then maybe have him move it to the other hand. in a lot of countries it is actually really common for men to do this. they wear it on their other hand and then once wed switch it over.
Post # 12
My fiance and I wore ours to brunch right after picking them up, well actually we wore them all day, but then they went into the safe. It was fun; however, I think it would be weird for either of us to wear them all the time.
I vote that he should take it off and wait for the ceremony. It’s symbolic of marriage and of the vows you make to one another. Neither of those have taken place yet, so he needs to take it off for now.
Post # 13
My parents got their wedding bands and started wearing them the day they arrived. It didn’t matter that they weren’t married yet to them, and it hasn’t made their wedding day or their marriage any less special. In fact, they’ve been married 31 years and are the happiest couple I know! My friends are ALWAYS commenting on how ‘head over heels in love’ my parents still are.
ETA: my parents are American, so it wasn’t based on a cultural thing, they just wanted to wear their wedding bands! Also my Mother doesn’t have an engagement ring, just the wedding band (and she even at the time regarded it as a wedding band, not an e-ring)
Post # 14
That’s so sweet! I wouldn’t really want him wearing it early for the reasons mentioned by PPs. I just checked your date to see how much longer he has- that is a while to wait! Maybe you could get him an ‘enagement’ ring in the meantime as mentioned earlier.
Post # 15
I’d say let him wear it, or if it’s bugging you, see about an e-ring for him. A growing number of women get e-rings that are so ornate that they just decide to wear that as their only wedding ring…so it’s sort of the same deal here.
I’ve actually known a few men who wore their wedding bands early as a symbol of their engagement. Perhaps you could take it the week of and inscribe it with something, so it’s a little bit different and still an extra special touch when he re-receives it as a wedding band?
Post # 16
I personally believe that marriage happens when you both make the decision in your hearts. It should make you feel very loved that he wants to outwardly show the world his level of comitment. If you both are there in your hearts, it’s not cheating.