Post # 1
I never heard of this practice until I saw it on the bee. What are your thoughts on including something like “We have reserved __ seat(s) in your honor.” on invitations? (the specific # of seats is filled in for each invitation) Please share any experiences you’ve had with this- good or bad.
Do you think it’s rude? unnecessary? a great idea? confusing?
ETA: I wonder the same thing about “__ of # will attend.” (where first slot is left empty for invitee to fill out and second slot bride writes in # of guests invited specific to each invitation)
Post # 3
I did this and it helped. It lets people know exactly who is invited. Not everyone knows that the names on the envelopes are the only ones invited. We still had one person ask to bring a stranger, we just told them no there is no room.
Post # 4
We’re using that! We aren’t having inner envelopes to list out every person’s name that is invited, so for us it was critical so we could be clear if +1’s, children, etc were invited or not.
Post # 5
I don’t think it’s rude! I think it’s a good idea & a good way to imply that the attendee does/doesn’t get a guest as well as whether or not children are invited. I didn’t do this on ours and I wish I did! So many people didn’t know they get a + 1 until I tracked them down and told me.
Post # 6
I didn’t do that, I don’t want to go through and write it in for every person and they should be able to figure it out by the names on the envelope!
Post # 7
I’ve seen this on invites before. I like it, because I never know if “number of guests” is supposed to include me, or just people I am bringing (and brides who have invited me have said both ways the various times I’ve asked.)
It also keeps people from tacking on a bunch of people who were not originally addressed on the invite.
Post # 8
I think “in your honor” is very stuffy language. I would put it more like “___ of _(x)_ will attend” where you fill in the latter number and they put a number in the blank.
With modern technology, if I were printing the RSVP cards on my own (we did online RSVPs, so it was basically like this), I would just put each name on the card and check-boxes for “will attend” or “will not attend.” That way you know who to make place cards for, if you’re doing that, and who to skip. A line that says “Guest: _______” is easy enough, too.
Post # 9
i don’t think it’s rude at all – and if it saves you 4 phone calls with dummies who want to rbing their kids/friend/dog then it’s totally worth it!
Post # 10
This is exactly what I did. I haven’t sent my invitations out yet, but this is how they are worded.
Post # 11
Definitely not rude! I think it’s a great idea … it helps to avoid any awkward conversations with guests who have RSVP-d for too many.
Post # 12
I think it’s unnecessary. I’ve never heard of people adding guests not listed on the envelope until the bee.
Post # 13
@Shkragoldfish: I did it!
We wrote: “We have reserved _ seats in your honor”
and on the bottom line I WROTE IN who was invited. There was no confusion and no one altered their cards.
Then I put
__ Accept with Joy
__ Decline with REgret
Names mentioned above attending: and they wrote in who was attending.’
Post # 14
We did this. Very few people I know are familiar with wedding etiquette and it is not inuitively obvious that only the names written on the invite are who is invited. If Jane and Jon Doe were written, would you really want the guest to assume that it was meant for the Jane and Jon Doe family? It also made it really clear whether they could bring a guest or not without awkward situations like them calling to ask.
Post # 15
Perhaps it’s not proper etiquette, but it was absolutely necessary in my case. We only have 50 seats at our ceremony and could not let anyone bring extra people that we did not specifically invite. I actually wrote all invitees on the envelope and wrote them in on the RSVP card, too. With my family, you can’t be too careful. We ended up having no issues at all, so it worked.
Post # 16
@MrsTVLover: I did do this and had inner envelopes and still have had two come back with children added. Unfortunately it seems as though guests need as much direction as possible now about who is invited.
I did this. If I could do it over I would probably take the time to add the names and then a check boxes for “attending” or “not attending.”