Post # 1
So last night we had a BBQ with all our bridal party to discuss the plan for our wedding next weekend. One of my friends told me that she couldnt convince her boyfriend to wear dress pants so he is going to wear a ‘nice’ pair of jeans. This has really been bugging me as our wedding is going to be relatively formal, not black tie but definately smart and at a really lovely venue. Iv had a number of friends txt me asking if their husbands/boyfriends etc should wear a tie and jacket, so I was surprised that someone intends on wearing jeans. Has anyone been in this situation before? Obviously nothing I can do about it but be a bit annoyed! Grrrr
Post # 3
who the hell wears jeans to a wedding…… geez. im sorry that your having to do thru this. I would def pull your friend aside and tell her that it is going to be formal and that her bf should at least wear khakis and a polo. geez!! having to tell people how to dress…. drives me crazy! Good luck!
Post # 4
Unless an invitation specifically mentions jeans as acceptable garb, or states country casual etc., I think anyone who has graduated high school should be able to figure out that they are not appropriate wear for a wedding. If they haven’t graduated from high school hopefully we can depend on their mothers to set them straight.
You really should have spoken up at the time she raised the subject, as that was your opening. “Our wedding is semi-formal and we were hoping our guests would forego jeans for the day.”
Post # 5
I’m not sure I would have been able to restrain myself from saying, “If he can’t dress appropriately for the wedding, it sounds like he doesn’t really want to be there, so maybe he should decline the invitation.”
Post # 6
@geekspice: +1. i’m with you on this.
sorry, but jeans aren’t appropriate for a wedding. i know that they make really nice jeans. however, they also make nice dress pants. if someone shows up at my wedding in jeans, i would and will be annoyed. it’s common sense. unless it’s a completely casual, backyard wedding, jeans are not proper wedding attire.
Post # 7
@MeeShell: She “told” you that he is going to be wearing jeans? Didn’t even “ask” if he could? I’d be quite embarassed. I’ve not replied to any etiquette threads because each to their own, etc. but jeans are not acceptable to wear to a wedding & I would maybe mention that it is a WEDDING & that he may feel uncomfortable being so underdressed. This might help with changing his mind, perhaps?
Post # 8
My fiance and our son w orn a pair of jeans to the past three formal events we have been to,two were weddings and and the other a big family party. Both times they wore black smart jeans and a shirt, no one even noticed they were not wearing dress trousers. I dont have the budget to buy dress trousers for every event for our ever growing son and my fiance hates dress trousers as they dont suit or ever fit well. To be honest I dont think you will even notice if you just ask them to please wear black rather then blue jeans, with smart shoes rather then trainers. In fact there was comments about how smart both my boys looked in match black and matching shirts.
Post # 9
I’ve commented on this subject a few times. My FI has worn jeans to 2 weddings…neither was formal, but everyone else was dressed up. At the time, he didn’t own any dress pants, nor did we have the extra money to buy him some. I wasn’t thrilled about it, me being dressed up, but in the end, it didn’t really matter. All the couples cared about was the fact that he showed up to the wedding that we were INVITED to because we are FRIENDS with these people. The last thing I’m going to get annoyed over at my wedding is a pair of jeans on a guest.
Post # 10
@MeeShell: let it go. No one is going to be focused on your friend’s boyfriend. Concentrate on the things that will actually have an effect on your wedding. No need to sweat the small stuff.
Post # 11
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
It’s weird that your friend mentioned it before the wedding but on the day of no one is going to pay any attention to him and if they do they’ll be side-eyeing it.
My MOH’s husband, who is a wonderful guy, just DOESN’T own any dress clothes and clearly doesn’t intend to buy any. At the last wedding we all attended before DH and I’s he wore a “nice V-neck” with khaki’s that were more like cargo pants. We all gave him crap about it… and he wore another “nice V neck” to our wedding. *shrug* It really didn’t bother me.
I don’t even remember if anyone was wearing jeans to our wedding, I bet some were. The only reason I remember MOH’s DH wearing a v neck is because we all joked about it.
Post # 12
Honestly wearing jeans to a wedding says to me “Yeah. I really can’t be bothered to even dress up as nicely for you as I do my coworkers and throw on a pair of 10 dollar Old Navy khakis. I’m just here for the open bar”.
I wouldn’t have someone thrown out over it, but I’d call it rude.
Post # 13
If one person wears jeans, they’re just embarassing themselves. Just tell her that, and beyond that, don’t worry. No one will pay much attention to him anyway.
Post # 14
Actually, at my last wedding, several guest wore jeans. I did’t even notice until I saw some of them in the wedding pics. Frankly, I didn’t care during or after the wedding.
Post # 15
- Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY
Who wears jeans to a wedding!! That is so wrong!!!
Post # 16
How about caring more about these people taking time to come to your wedding instead of how they are wrapped?