Post # 1
My mother passed away when I was 4 years old. I don’t remember too much about her, but I have lots of pictures and I do know I look exactly like her. I can see it and I am constantly having people tell me how much I look like her. I decided early on that I wanted to wear her wedding dress. It is a very classy “Grace Kelly” inspired dress. It’s in perfect condition, it fits like a glove, its beautiful and most importantly it was my mama’s. Of course there were many tears when I was trying it on for the first time. My dad asked to see it on me so of course I obliged. That’s when the real waterworks started and now I’m not sure I can go through with wearing it on the big day. My dad was an emotional wreck. My aunt told me that I looked so much like my mom he was just having a hard time dealing. She said he would be fine but I don’t know. I tried asking him if he was still ok with me wearing it but he doesn’t seem to want to discuss. I don’t know should I wear it? I’m not even sure what I want to do anymore….
Post # 3
I think wearing the dress would be a tribute to your mother and a link between the two of you. I am sure it was difficult and somewhat shocking for your father, but also meaningful. Your Dad has many months to adjust until your wedding-I am sure once the initial shock has passed it will be easier for him to see you.
If you want to talk to him about it I would give it a little time.
Post # 4
I think you and your father should give this a little time. Maybe in two months you could put the dress on again and see how you feel. If you feel you may want to wear your mom’s dress, then talk to your father to get his thoughts. If she has a veil, maybe that would work with a new dress. Or, maybe getting a new veil to go with your mom’s dress. A small change may make it easier for your father…..and you. Best wishes.
Post # 5
That is very sweet… I’m sure it will just take him a little time. What a beautiful tribute to your mother!
Post # 6
Give it a month and ask your dad how he feels. YES it will be hard on him, but in a good way because it is such a positive way to remember your mother. My mom’s best friend came to my wedding (she’s like my second mother) and her husband died 10 years ago. She weeped a little at the wedding b/c some of the songs reminded her of her husband, but she was still happy. If your dad wants you to wear the dress (and you do, too), you should do it. I think it’s wonderful. You could also wear it just for the ceremony and wear something else for the reception
Post # 7
Is it enough that you wore it once and your dad saw you in it? Is that enough to satisfy your feelings? Maybe get your portrait done in the dress and then wear another dress for your ceremony? Like the others were saying if you give you and your dad enough time for the shock of all the memories to wear off it will be much easier for you and your dad. Hang in there you will make the right decision.
Post # 8
@Cincity75 – I love the idea of doing potraits in her dress! I want my wedding to be a super happy day, not a day of mourning! And I don’t want all the relatives and family friends telling me throughout the entire day how much I look like my mom and then make my dad cry.
Post # 9
Maybe you could have some alterations done to make it a little more your dress, and a little less your mom’s dress? I also like the idea of using a different type of veil–or maybe wearing your mama’s veil and a new dress? There are many possibilities. And giving you and your dad time to adjust maybe one of them. Maybe your aunt will have ideas too. Best Wishes. 🙂
Post # 10
i think it probably brought back old memories from your father, it was probably shocking to him. he was expecting to see you in your mothers dress. but if you are anything like me i look exactly like my mother, there is the possibility that he came in and saw his wife. i hope you know what i mean. just tell him that it means a lot o wear it. he will understand. i think a second time he will see his daughter.