(Closed) Wedding Anxiety

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

First, take a deep breath!  Second, know that your feelings are 100% justified.  My advice in this situation would be to remember what the day is really about.  Remember that you’re there to marry your FI, to start a new life together, and that’s it.  I think it’s hard sometimes to remember that, even if we don’t have anxiety about being on display for our entire families.

I would have a talk with your FI to relieve some of your anxities, and just ask that he be super considerate of how you’re feeling that day.  And remember, you can do whatever you want for your wedding.  If you don’t want to walk down the aisle alone, don’t!  Maybe meet your FI at the end and walk together down the aisle, or don’t walk at all!  To be honest, you need to focus on how important this is to you, and not making everyone else happy in the situation.  Do whatever it takes to make your wedding day what you want (even if you can’t elope).

Post # 4
Member
2475 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I can understand how you feel because I feel the same way.  Unfortunately, I have to deal with a larger traditional wedding in about five months.  Just thinking about it makes me really anxious.

I agree that you need try your best to focus on the fact that you are getting married, not that you are having a wedding.  Focus on your excitement of your future together and try to push everything else to the back of your mind.  On the big day just remember to breathe and try to relax…and a little champagne never hurt anyone 🙂

Post # 5
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

You’re definitely not alone. I had an upset tummy all morning on the day of our wedding because all attention was on me, and it was stressing me out. I was pretty much like that all day, but honestly, I enjoyed the majority of the day anyway.

I agree with sarafoxy. Talk to your FI. See if you can come up with some ideas together that will alleviate your anxiety. I also agree about the walking down the aisle thing. Maybe before walking down the aisle, you guys can walk toward each other from separate sides, meet at the beginning of the aisle, and walk down together.

I found that talking about the stress always helped me. I even BALLED during our rehearsal dinner because it was all getting to me, and after, I felt so much better, and I was able to enjoy the rest of the dinner.

Post # 6
Member
1392 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010 - Heron Hill Winery

How anxious are you?  Is it impeding on your ability to function?  I know it may be too late, but you can speak with your Dr. and see if they can give you something for the anxiety….I would also recommend talking to your FI about your stress perhaps this will help calm yourself a bit. 

“There are certain herbs which on included in the food supplements will definitely prove helpful in reducing the level of anxiousness and fear. These include chamomile, skullcap, orange blossom, cloves, balm, thyme, lavender, hops, wood betony and much more.”

 

I would also suggest maybe a spa treatment to calm your nerves…I hope you can get through this deary!  Best wishes.

Post # 7
Member
948 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018 - Coyaba Resort, Montego Bay

This does sound like crippling anxiety & I am so sorry to hear that you are experiencing it!  I’ve been there myself and it is no fun 🙁

If you have time, consider going to your doctor today & seeing if there is something he/she can presribe for you – perhaps a very low dose of Xanax or something similar.  Also, consider scheduling a massage on Saturday morning or any other time that you may have in the next two days.  Best of luck to you!

Post # 8
Member
1045 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2008

I would definitely agree to just try to minimize the “traditional” things that would put ALL EYES on you– eliminate things like walking down the aisle, walking into the reception under a big announcement fanfare, having everyone watch your first dance, throwing the bouquet, etc.

I think the wedding shower can be much more stressful than the wedding day, for people with social anxiety– everyone’s sitting around in a circle staring at you, and watching to see your reaction to the gifts, asking you tons of questions, etc.  Whereas with the wedding day, there’s much more to do (dinner, dancing, drinking, etc.), so all eyes won’t be on you the whole time.

Maybe instead of focusing on it being 20 sets of eyes on you, you can break it down to the individuals.  Instead of thinking of it as this HUGE group, can you think of the actual people who will be witnessing, and sort of work through those emotions. 

Post # 9
Bee
13579 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2009 - Barr Mansion

I’m so sorry that you’re feeling this way!  I agree with the ladies above who said to see if your doctor can help.  Just know that no matter what, after Saturday, the wedding will be over and you will be married.  Try to focus on that!

Post # 10
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Oh Vanilla!  I’m so sorry that this is happening to you!  Definitely talk to your fiance to let him know about your anxiety, and if it helps, try visualizing your wedding ceremony as just you and him.  Hopefully some positive visualization can help to relax you.  I also second the idea of talking to your doctor ASAP.  I know Saturday is really soon, but hopefully there is time for your doctor to prescribe something for your anxiety. 

Good luck!!

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