Wedding Bee with a fiancé recovering from cancer

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
6525 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Simplysosweet:  I’m so sorry. I know what its like to have to see someone suffer from cancer.

I don’t know anyone that has gone through anything like this. I am just here to give you some support. I hope that he continues to stay in remission.

Its hard to be excited about anything when you have no idea what the future holds. Hpwever, you need tk be strong and live everyday as if it were your last. My mom told me thats what kept her going when she was taking care of my dad. They never stopped planning anything, they lived life as if nothing was wrong. I suggest you do the same. You may not be excited about the planning but it will keep you occupied.

I also think that when your wedding day comes, you will be excited bc it not only be a celebration of love but a celebration of life. It will be a beautiful to start for your marriage vows. For better or for worse and in sickness and in health… staying positive helps. 🙂

Post # 4
7286 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Simplysosweet:  I planned my wedding whilst having cancer. I think the most important thing is to get a hold of your worries. Easier said than done I know. But by letting your worries steal your happiness then it essentially wins. 

I am not saying don’t have some worries but don’t let it become all consuming eother. It is not healthy for you and it really wont help your FI. He probably already feels like a burden and he probably also feels like you should be with someone else, someone who may not get sick. What he needs now is for you to be strong and to not add to his worry.

One thing that having battled cancer for many years has taught me is that no ones future is clear. You can get hit by a bus tomorrow, you could have a heart attack- yet people do not really worry about those things unless they just get missed by a bus or have a medical test. If you spend your life worrying about what ifs you will miss the now!

Encourage your FI to keep having his yearly checks, both of you look after health and live life.


Post # 5
1592 posts
Bumble bee

Is the cancer a secret, or is it something that is openly known?

  If his diagnosis is openly known, and you want to be honest,  I think it’s OK to say something like, “We’re excited for the wedding, it’s going to be a great day.  But to be honest, we just aren’t caught up in it like we were before.  We’re thankful that he seems to be in the clear, but we’ve learned that each day is precious and it’s the marriage that we’re really looking forward to.”  

Or, just smile sweetly and say, “we can’t wait for the wedding”  

Or mix and match the answers depending upon how close you are with whomever asks. 


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