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I don't really have any advice, but wanted to tell you that I related to your post. As a wedding planner, I felt a tremendous amount of pressure to have the perfect wedding. I've planned weddings for people with a $100,000 budget, and mine was so, so much less. DH and I paid for most everything ourselves, and in the end, I felt like maybe we cut too much, and I have a lot of regrets.
To save money, my family decided to stay in our one bedroom apartment for three days prior to the wedding - I ended up sleeping on the floor the night before our wedding, and woke up feeling like crap, which really did affect the mood of the day. While we were getting dressed, I was so overwhelmed by people asking me millions of questions about flowers and linens, etc. I sat down and cried for a while. So embarrassing! Not to mention all of the family drama (i.e. Aunt and cousin almost getting in a fist fight, Grandma getting drunk, etc.)
I don't think you're being silly at all. I know everyone says "All that matters is that you marry your best friend!" But if that were true, we wouldn't plan for a year and spend so much money, right? I was so happy with our ceremony and that's what I focus on. Plus everyone said they had a blast, but if I could do it all again, I'd probably just go to Vegas. PM me if you want to vent further. I have lots of stories I could share! Heck, they'd probably make you feel better!
I completely understand! I actually wrote a similar post not that long ago. My sadness wasn't really budget-related, but more just that the day wasn't enjoyable. It broke my heart. It was so stressful and hectic. It's weird because I never dreamed of having a big wedding or "the prefect day". I thought I would have been okay with whatever happened. I was so disappointed though. And, not to sound too awful, but I feel terrible every time someone says that their wedding was the best day of their life. I'm jealous. I wish I could say that. Feel free to PM me too if you want to vent or swap stories. Also, check our the thread I posted - it made me feel better to read about all the things that went wrong at other people's weddings and know that I wasn't alone. I think we'll all feel better over time. It's okay to let yourself feel bad - you're mourning the loss of your day. Be forgiving, try to focus on the postive, and know that in time it will get better.
Same here - not much advice but can certainly relate. There were parts that were wonderful/beautiful but certainly some incidents that ruined what I thought would be one of my favorite days. It's been a few months and I feel like I'm not as upset over certain things now, and I'm hoping that the disappointment continues to subside over time.
It is nice to feel validated though, being that I'm not the only one out there. I'm just enjoying my day-to-day married life and when I think back to that day, I try to just focus on the positives. I hope all you ladies can do the same! I'm sure we will all have many great memories to come over the years that will totally outshine our wedding day.
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Let me start off by saying that this post is just as much for my own personal therapy as it is to see what others have to say. I don't think any of my friends would understand and I definitely can't talk to my hubbie about it...he spent so much time saving for our wedding and I don't want him to think it was anything less than great (nothing is perfect).
The overall wedding itself was fine, we paid for everything ourselves because I didn't feel right asking our parents to pay for it after they had put us through college and we each have siblings in college. Because we dictated the budget we basically got to do everything we wanted. My problem now is that when I look back on my wedding day all I can remember is how I didn't feel like I had any fun, I felt ugly (due to some medical issues I compromised on dress and hair) and that I had to give up certain things like a bridal shower and a bachelorette party because of decisions we had made. I completely understand that the wedding is only the ceremony and the marriage is what lasts but they don't say that girls plan this forever for nothing. I feel like I missed out on my own wedding and I was so upset I actually cried for a second that night..well I guess really early morning.
Maybe it's just me being silly to feel so upset over one day but that's kind of the point; that it's just one day and it's supposed to make you feel excited and happy not sad. I don't like to compare weddings because each couple has their own individual style, budget and personal choices but I've known so many people who got married in the last few months that say it was the "most amazing day of their lives and they wish it could have lasted forever". Seeing these statements just make me feel a little worse. Am I the only one who has such strong negative feelings towards her wedding? And will it ever become one of those moments I laugh about in the future or just something to forget and move on from?