- 6 years ago
First, thanks for taking the time to read and comment on my questions; I appreciate it.
So, I’m about to be married, but the wedding jitters are blossoming. However, I’m having difficulty in addressing what exactly the problem is.
I like the girl, she’s fun, we have the same interests to a large extent, we have simlar plans for the future etc.
However, quite often when I think about the upcoming marriage I get a feeling in my gut that something is not right. Basically, my logicial brain, which has been going through pros and cons a zillion times says that this is a good idea, and that we have what it takes to be successful together (successful as in happy). Sure, there are some issues, such as s slightly difference in sex drive and also a different need to spend time together, but these are not really red flags I think.
Nevertheless, I get a feeling that something is not right. I’m very scared that I might break it of in a few years time, and leave her devestated, something I dread. I’m pretty much a people pleaser guy, but during this relationship I’ve grown a lot as a person and have become better at meeting my own needs. Still, I can’t escape the feeling that something is not right. I wish I loved her deeply, but I’m not a person that falls easily in love, and think I would rather have friendship and respect as pillars in the relationship rather than a feeling which may or may not fade away. WHen I say that I wished I loved her deeply I do cherish her, but I’m not madly in love.
I’ve kinda waited for the answer to appear out of nowhere, but it seems I have to make the decision and find out of things on my own. Still, perhaps people on this board have come across some techniques to use in order to firm up their committment to their SU? I’m really afraid that I’m not as into her as she is to me, and that I will end up breaking her heart at some point, and that’s why I take this decision extremely seriously.
Hope someone can help.