Weddingbee boards

Hive, I need some serious advice. I am in a horrible/awkward situation regarding my wedding dress, and am unhappy and very unsure of what to do next. I apologize in advance for the long post!

I attended a trunk show in May at a very reputable bridal boutique about an hour and a half away from where I live. Both the bridal boutique staff and a representative for the designer had great customer service. I ended up ordering my dress on the day of the trunk show.

Fast forward to October. I got a call from the bridal boutique that my dress was in. I drove there (an hour and a half) so I could try it on. I asked that they press the gown for me so that I could come and pick the dress up in a few weeks. I got a phone call a day or two later from the manager of the boutique telling me that in pressing the dress, a noticeable mistake was noticed in the construction of the dress; specifically the hem. My options were either (a) have the bridal boutique's seamstress repair the hem in-store or (b) send the dress back to the designer who would either repair the dress or construct a new dress entirely. Needless to say I was very upset that my perfect dress wasn't so perfect. Before I made a decision, the bridal boutique notified me that the designer had requested they send the dress back and was going to create a brand new dress. I was annoyed that I didn't get to make the final decision, but figured that the bridal boutique and the designer were making the best choice and I trusted them. 

The (second) dress came back from the designer and I went last weekend to pick it up. I looked the dress over and it seemed different than I remembered it looking back in May. I chalked it up to the difference in size and color, put it in the car, and traveled the hour and a half back home. After I got home I started comparing some pictures I had taken of the dress to pictures I had of me in the sample dress in May. Immediately I noticed some HUGE differences. Differences involving beading, construction of the bodice, differences in width of the sewn in sash, etc. How could my dress differ so much from the sample?!

I called the designer's company the next day via their contact information on their website. They would not talk to me as I am not "their customer", and instructed me to notify the bridal boutique. I did so, e-mailing the boutique owner pictures of the two dresses and talking with her on the phone about the very noticeable differences. Although the owner has been helpful and has forwarded these photos and my complaints to the designer, I feel very uneasy this entire situation and it has tainted my feelings about the dress.

As it stands, the designer wants to solve the problem by making yet another (third!!!) dress. This would require me to travel again to transport the dress back to the bridal boutique, costing me both money and time. At this point, I also don't trust the quality of the designer's work. Right now I don't even want the dress  There are only feelings of sadness and stress attached to it, and it no longer feels like "the dress". I just want to get my money back, move forward and be able to get a dress that I feel happy and excited about.

What do you think my options are in this situation? 
Should I fight to get my money back since I haven't been given the dress I paid for?
How can I get around the typical "no returns" policy?

I'm no expert, but I think that if you tell the owner of the boutique what you're thinking, she'll probably help you out.

If that doesn't work, however, you might consider telling the boutique and the designer that you're going to contact the Better Business Bureau (and then do it if they still won't budge).

Still, I doubt you'll have to resort to that. It sound like the boutique owner is reasonable.

One other thing to consider: are you sure that you won't get over your dress woes once you've got the right version in-hand? Sure, it feels yuck right now - but once you've got the correct dress hanging in your closet, I don't think it will still remind you of this awkward situation. There's a reason you chose it in the first place!

Either way, good luck. :)

Thanks so much for your thoughtful responses  to answer a few of your questions:

* I do (barely) have enough time to start over. But only about a month or so to buy a new dress if it comes to that. Even so, I feel it's worth it to rush in order to find something that I feel great about. 
* Thankfully, I have found something that I love and has no bad feelings attached! Unfortunately, this dress is by a designer that this bridal boutique doesn't carry. Therefore, any sort of "in-store credit" wouldn't benefit me.
* When I picture myself wearing this dress on my wedding day, it makes me sad. It will always remind me of the past month of stress and drama. Plus I work on vibes, and I am totally not feeling this dress anymore because of everything that has happened.

Wiglet - thanks for the BBB suggestion. I will definitely try it if things don't seem to be happening how I want them to.

i am still waiting to hear back from the designer...

anyone have any additional advice?