Wedding + finances + too many opinions = unhappy ME

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
4576 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@CocoClassic:  I’m with you. We are doing a DW of sorts in FL and are going back and forth with having a large reception back in Texas for the same reason. We have our guest list for it, but as we were looking at it (and the cost), BF said “we don’t even SEE most of these people and, frankly, I don’t really care for several of them.”

So, we may be eliminating the big reception. There are a million other things we can spend that money on, and since we rarely hear from most of the list, I dont feel the need to spend money entertaining them.

Post # 5
Member
2276 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@CocoClassic:  you should invite people you love and want there. Whether or not they bring a gift should not even in the equation (IMO). I know it goes agaisnt etiquette not to bring a gift/card to a wedding,  but i did not base my guest list on who would bring a gift. I choose not to judge someone for not showing up with a gift bc 1) that’s not what my wedding was about and 2) I dont know their financal situation .

 

I do understand your stress about money. I just had my wedding with 100 guests on a 7k budget. I’d be happy to PM you some tips that helped me save :).

Post # 6
Member
7531 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@CocoClassic:  JMHO, but exactly who does your FI want to be included.  I think that is where I’d start.  Then the restaurant option seems fits best with what you want, based on the amount of guests (the people he “REALLY” wants to celebrate with–is this truly only 30 people, or will it be more?).  

Post # 7
Member
4576 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@CocoClassic:  We are going the “no children” route. Period, end of discussion. So no, I obviously do not think someones 10 kids need an invite.

Post # 8
Member
3635 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Best decision we made was to keep it to immediate family and our closest of friends.  For us that totalled 40 people at the wedding (including the us, keyboard player, photog, pastor, and his wife). 

Post # 10
Member
928 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I’d go for the smaller lounge wedding, adults only. Don’t do anything where guests will have to pay for themselves lol!

Post # 11
Member
926 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@CocoClassic I went through the same excercise of all possible sizes and types of wedding.  I ended up going for a slightly smaller (80 guests vs 150) so that we could have exactly what we wanted and not break the bank.  I’m all for saving some money, especially if you want to put it torwards a nice honeymoon or a house, etc.  I am not a huge crowd or party person, so I know I would be happier and less stressed with fewer people.  Plus it’s more intimate and you can talk to everybody.

Post # 13
Member
27 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I would recommend eloping if you don’t really care about all the people being there and want it to just be about you and your husband!

Post # 15
Member
928 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@CocoClassic:  hahaha well, i mean a 30 person list should cover all the A-listers, right? I got married 8 months ago and there’s already people who attended my 70-person wedding that I’ll never see again & wish weren’t in so many pictures! Big wedding = big $, time, drama, dedication, if you two aren’t really into it to begin with then planning a large wedding’s gonna suuuuck. Keep it small and then it can be extra awesome for the few who attend : )

Post # 16
Member
27 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@CocoClassic:  Oops, sorry- she not he! And yeah, I know how that goes! =) Good luck.

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