Post # 1
So I’m going to a wedding this weekend and I have not been to one in about 8 years and that was with my parents so I didn’t supply a gift since I was only 18 at the time. I have a question, if you go to the brides shower and give them a gift off their registery, should you also write them a check in their wedding card? I am hearing conflicting reports lol so I just want to know what is more typical, I spent about $125 on their shower gift if that matters.
Post # 3
The shower and the wedding are two separate events that necessitates two separate gifts. I typically just write a check for the wedding.
Post # 4
@abbie017: That’s what I thought at first then I was hearing the oposite and I don’t want to insult anyone so I was just trying to see what the typical “norm” was. Thank you!
Post # 5
We do usually $125 per person who is at the wedding…so at least $250 for me and Fiance combined…..
But you should give whatever you’re comfortable with….
Post # 6
Ditto with what PP said about giving what is comfortable for you.
FWIW, I personally do a shower gift off the registry (a decorative/fun item – usually $50-70) and another registry gift/cash for the wedding (from both Fiance and me – approximately $200).
Some bees I’ve spoken to said they do one large gift for the shower though and none for the wedding. Perhaps it is a geographical/cultural thing?
I also wouldn’t worry about what it’s “appropriate” necessarily. It’s really the thought that counts. We have people that we know are in financial difficulties and they are gifting us (based on the Thank You Manager anyway) a $50 gift. We have others that are comfortable and they are doing $200+.
Post # 7
@lilbluebird: Yeah I really don’t know. But I think Fiance and I will be writing them a check for sure. We aren’t super super close them but close enough.
Post # 8
I always do a mid-size gift for the shower (about $50) and a check for the wedding ($200 for both of us) unless I know there is a big ticket registry item she wants.
Post # 9
I tend to give a gift for both. In terms of how much, just spend what you can afford. It’s a gift, and they’ll be grateful.
Post # 10
@Gemstone: Thanks! All these wedding politics make my head hurt!
Post # 11
Yeah, just give what you can for the wedding gift. I mean, your shower gift was generous and I’m sure very much appreciated! 🙂 So, if I were you I’d either get a gift off the registry or just give cash. Cash/check would be easiest 🙂 and probably just as appreciated if they’re jetting off for the honeymoon
Post # 12
You’re technically suppose to give a gift for both since the bridal shower is separate from the wedding.
Post # 13
Give what you can and what you can afford. i don’t expect people to get me a shower gift AND a wedding gift as well. Besides $125 for a gift is very generous. If you don’t want to show up empty handed, a nice card will suffice.
Post # 14
Gift for the shower; money in the card for wedding.
Post # 15
Where I live, if you gave a shower gift, you aren’t expected to give a wedding gift.