Wedding gift registry

posted 3 years ago in Gifts and Registries
  • poll: What do you think of this?
    Mentioning gifts at all is tacky : (12 votes)
    27 %
    This is a tasteful way to address the issue of gifts : (12 votes)
    27 %
    This is confusing-as a guest, I do not understand what I should do. : (12 votes)
    27 %
    This is helpful in thinking about the kind of gift to give you : (8 votes)
    18 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    8720 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    Please dont do this Unless you are in the UK or something. As a guest, I would find it a bit ridiculous.

    Post # 5
    Member
    676 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    I personally think that is beautiful, I wouldn’t mind reading that on your website at all.  I would maybe do a small registry though for the traditionalists.

    Post # 6
    Member
    2788 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Go with a registry, that way you give people that want an actual physical idea something to choose from. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    3280 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I would find it a bit odd so I’d just give cash.

    Post # 8
    Member
    8720 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @kimmyd:  I would just read it and think to myself: all of that to basically ask for cash? I’m not sure people will know exactly what it means.

    I dont think people should “ask” at all whether it be via cutesy poem or 5 paragraphs or not. I think by not registering you send a clear message and I would give you cash anyway. Also, I may be trying to really figure out what all that means (Ie: it is confusing). For the record, I wouldnt be offended though. I would just read and say, “really?” To myself. I’m just one person though so if you know your crowd then go ahead and do it.

    Post # 11
    Member
    46 posts
    Newbee

    To myself. I’m just one person though so if you know your crowd then go ahead and do it.

    Post # 12
    Member
    873 posts
    Busy bee

    I think it is lovely and well conveys the fact that you are not requesting gifts but here are some nice ideas if you feel the need. i think you are very clear in your desire to not make people spend money on you. You sound like a lovely person and my guess is that your friends are like minded individuals who will understand where this sentiment is coming from and will understand the intention behind it. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    1090 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    @kimmyd:  I think the wording is tasteful and not pushy at all.

    However, I’m just one of *those* people who think mentioning gifts in general is rude in and of itself. I’m just biased that way, and I’m struggling with my own approach to my registries.

    So I wouldn’t use it, or I would at least cut everything between the first paragraph and the Kiva memorial fund. 

    I also wouldn’t put it on the homepage or the welcome page. I’d make a Registry page and just put that statement on there with a link to the Kiva fund.

    If people don’t donate and instead get you gifts that aren’t really your style, I’m sure you can just return them for cash to help you settle down.

    Post # 14
    Member
    480 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I think it’s nice.

    I’m a little confused by the line ” bring your instruments to our wedding”, are you asking people just to come and play something at the wedding or is that part of the gift suggestions?

    I think that whole paragraph is a little confusing, I would just make it simpler, something saying that you like an appreciate homemade gifts and the monetry value is not important (I just spent ages trying to find a nice way to phrase that and failed but my English is rubbish so, obviously it would need to be better put).  You should also be careful not to ailientate any non-artistic guests who would feel they don’t have the tallent to make something.

    We do have a normal registry.  The text on our website is something like:

    “You precense at the wedding is all we need, if you would like to get us something, please feel free to use your imagination.  Alternatively we have a gift list…..”

     

    gelaine22 I’m curious, why do you think this would not be appropriate in the USA but would be in England?  I know there are quite a lot of differences between USA/UK weddings but I would have thought gift lists was an area where they are similar.

    Post # 15
    Member
    2878 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I actually think it’s great.  As you state, you don’t need gifts, but you know that guests want guidance on that issue.  You give them several viable options.  I don’t understand how people would not understand it….  However, that being said, I still suggest setting up a small registry (just of items you actually need – are there things you need to replace?) for traditionalists.

    ETA: Be wary of inviting guests to bring their instruments to their wedding, unless you truly would like some of your friends to come and play pieces throughout the evening 🙂

    Post # 16
    Member
    8905 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    @kimmyd:  I think it really depends on your crowd. There are a lot of etiquette-minded folks here who will say no. I would not mind one bit however ( you’re not just asking for $ – the homemade gifts and kiva options give people a whole range of options). If your friends and family are all chill, you’ll be fine. If there are more traditional older folks, it might be iffy. 

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