Post # 1
OK, our wedding is a little less than a month away now and both my FI and I are reaching the breaking point on dealing with responses to our invitations. A little back story….
We’re getting married up in the mountains and almost all of our guests will be from out of town. We wanted to find a place that’s sort of a local/destination combination since a lot of our family and friends have never been to Colorado before and we wanted them to get to see why we love it so much.
Going into the planning, I knew the trip could be pricey for our guests so we did everything we could to make sure people that we really wanted to be there could plan ahead and get a good deal. We had rooms blocked really early to get a very reasonable price, i posted airfare deals and seat sale notifications on our wedding website and emailed people to let them know and have offered help coordinating shared rooms, shared rental cars and anything else we could.
So now we’re down to the wire and a big chunk of our close friends are all giving us the same story. They can’t afford it, it’s too much time away from work and even though they REALLY want to be there they just can’t swing it. I understand that the economy is not great and people are tightening their belts, but these are the same friends that have posted pictures of elaborate vacations they’ve been on already this year and who are also admitting to have left booking the trip to our wedding to the very last minute.
I’m personally irritated, but have too much else on my plate right now to spend a lot of time agonizing over it, the part that is killing me is that my FI is getting really upset and feels that he’s just not that important to his friends anymore!
Any suggestions on how to make him feel better about it all?
Post # 3
Hmmm to make him feel better how about boudoir pix in the mountains ;)….. As far as the friends, people oftentimes make plans to attend what they really want to, there may have been financial problems that just came up, or maybe they spent too much money on those vacations. Perhaps they’ll send a really nice gift since they couldn’t attend (HUGS)
Post # 4
What if you host a little party at your place, when you arrive back from your honeymoon? It can be a simple wine/cheese type thing – that way – your friends can celebrate with you and you can share with them pictures, etc – and your FI can look forward to sharing the moment with those friends.
And – remind him – that while you are equally bummed about them not being able to attend – that at the end of it all -regardless of who is able to attend – you’ll be married!! 🙂 If you show less emotion about it, he’ll hopefully pick up on that.
Post # 5
“but these are the same friends that have posted pictures of elaborate vacations they’ve been on ” errhhhhhh – sorry but you lost me here
yes your wedding is important but where you choose to have it is imporant to you & not everyone else
i have no problem dropping $10K on a vacation of my choosing but if im spending alot of money to attend a wedding in a place that isnt where i would choose to go for a holiday then i other than my feelings for the couple, i have very little incentive to make the effort and attend. you chose colorado because “we wanted them to get to see why we love it so much”. that doesnt mean alot to the guest if they want to sit by the beach drinking tequila
dont mean to upset you but just wanted to explain where some of the guest are coming from
Post # 6
I dont htink there is a magic way to cheer him up because the reality is that the friends dont have the wedding as high priority as he would like and theres no way around the fact that that just hurts. Keep reminding him that this is about yall and that at the end of the day, you’ll be married. 🙂
Post # 7
Yea bit of a tricky one, poor wee lamb 🙁
Well I think if you both support each other and treat yourselves to some couple time, he’ll see that he is loved very much by you and that unfortunatly when it comes to weddings, there really is nowt as queer as folk.
As long as you both have a good time it does’nt matter who attends or not.