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Wedding Guest Woes

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
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    1.
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    158 posts
    Blushing bee
    casteel_dream    March 19, 2011  

    I am planning a medium sized wedding (150) the majority of my family are going and really no friends are going except two close ones. When I was first engaged, I made no wedding plans but brainstormed a bit with my friend. This friend ( a guy) is an ex who became friends later on. There is nothing going on between us, he has a girlfriend. As far as friends go, we are ok but not really close and we talked about one another weddings but now I am planning the budget and guest lists and I have to cut him out of it. Like I said, only two of my friends are actually going to the wedding. I don't want to hurt his feelings, help!

     
    2.
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    Sugar bee
    Tanya123      

    Well what do you want help with? 

    I don't know if it's OK to not invite this guy.  Did you previously say or imply that he would be invited?  "Wait until you here this band play."..... "Bring a sweater my  church is cold"....  If you've talked weddings that much, I'm thinking it might be best to invite him.

    If you're not close, how are you getting together to talk about weddings?  How often do you talk to him? If you truly aren't that close to him, and don't really speak to him, I suppose it's not a problem. 

     
    3.
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    Blushing bee
    casteel_dream    March 19, 2011  

    Before I planned the wedding, my friend and I would talk about some things, but after I started planning I kind of stopped talking about weddings in general with my friends who were not in the bridal party (I had a weird fear of only talking of the wedding). So, I thought he forgot about it until I let it slip that we were getting a certain venue for the wedding and he inferred he was invited. I tlk to him probably once every two weeks.

     
    4.
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    Honey bee
    ccranetobe    August 14, 2010  

    I just think your going to have to deal with an awkward situation or rejigg the invite.

    However have you allowed for people not to come? Like I know you have 150 people but did you over invite because about 15percent of guests actually decline which could make room for him.

     
    5.
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    Busy bee
    pharmy      

    Well, if you feel like it would ruin your relationship (no matter how "not close") you two are, then you should probably invite him. 1 more (2 if he brings the gf) person is not going to make a big difference (although if it is...then yeah, don't invite for that reason), since you will probably get a some "No" rsvps anyways.

    Otherwise, I'm sure if you don't send an invite, he'll get the hint. heh.

     
    6.
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    Busy bee
    TallBride    January 24 2009   Westlake Village, Ca

    Does your FH know you were talking to him? If so what does he think? If he doesn't know you were talking- not worth the drama IMO (and time to stop talking to that guy period. )

     
    7.
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    Buzzing bee
    rlsulli1598@verizon.net       oregon

    Here is a general answer: You could make a "B" list for those you couldn't invite, and as people say they can't come, you could invite from the B list.  I think this is done frequently.  Although, if there are other people who you and your FI would invite before him, he may not get invited.  Or you could suck it up and invite him if your FI doesn't mind. 

     
    8.
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    Helper bee
    smith207    October 2, 2010  

    Your wedding is in March 2011- you have a long way to go before those invites go out.  I would not stress about your guest list too much at this point.  A lot can change between now and then.

    In the meantime, if you are not sure about inviting him I would not talk to him anymore about wedding planning.

    Good luck!

     

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