Wedding guests that weren't invited

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
1499 posts
Bumble bee

Are you sure you really don’t have room for her? For just one person, I would think it might be ok. Caterers plan for a few extra guests to show up, they never make just enough food for your exact head count anyways.

I’m confused that you say your venue is too small when you were trying to invite her originally, so she must have been in some of your head counts?

Post # 3
39 posts

I would ask her why is she just now contacting you..lets be real u probably just don’t want her there because of her neglect of contacting you earlier..if you already had your bridal shower and she didn’t attend then I would feel the same way too

Post # 4
1715 posts
Bumble bee

I would tell her exactly what you told us: you already finalized your counts, and the venue cannot accommodate any more guests. 

That reason is logical, and, more importantly, true. Nothing more needs to be said. 

Post # 5
42089 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

changuita02:  Just tell her that you are sorry, but because she did not respond to your previous overtures, you did not have an address for her and were unable to extend an invitation. ‘If only you had contacted me earlier! Unfortunately, we are past the deadline date for the venue.”

Post # 8
3806 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

changuita02:  I would tell her the exact way that you mentioned it here. The guestlist is closed and final numbers have been sent in to the planner and the caterer so there isn’t room for her. Leave it at that. You don’t owe any additional explanation. 

We need to treat adults like adults. No hand-holding.

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