Post # 1
Hi Bee’s! Never thought the wording on these wedding inserts would be so difficult! I want to make sure these look/sound ok before we send them out. Any feedback would be great!!
RSVP: Kindly Reply by August 22nd 2012
Yes, save me a beach chair! Number of Adults attending__
Sorry, our beach chairs will be empty __
Hotel Rooms have been reserved for Saturday night at the Sunset hotel in Somers Point, NJ. Please reference the Doe-Smith wedding when making your arrangements.
We also recommend the Tahiti Inn, conveniently located in Ocean City, NJ.
In the event of inclement weather, we will be married at the Ocean City Yacht Club at 4:30PM with the reception to follow immediately after. Please refer to our wedding website for updates.
Post # 3
For the insert, I would include booking info for the hotel (website or phone number). To be a bit clearer, I might say, “A block of rooms has been reserved for Saturday night at the Sunset hotel in Somers Point, NJ. To book a room at the negotiated rate, call [phone number] or visit [website], and mention the Doe-Smith wedding.” And I would include your wedding website address in the last paragraph – I have found that you cannot remind people of your website address too often.
I think the RSVP looks great! If you are concerned about people adding univited guests (as many ppl are), you could word it:
___ beach chairs have been reserved in your honor (you fill in that part)
Yes! Please save us ___ beach chairs!
Sorry, ___ beach chairs will be empty.
Otherwise, I like the way you’ve worded it. Very cute for a beach wedding.
Post # 4
Specifically regarding the verbiage on “booking a room” so they don’t think you’ve paid for the reservation.
Post # 5
Here are some suggested edits for your RSVP card:
You say RSVP, so you should not say “kindly reply.” You should use one or the other, but definitely not both, as it’s redundant.
Omit the “nd” after the date. The date is properly expressed either in formal written form, “the twenty-second of August … ,” (which is more appropriate for your invitations themselves) or in simple, numeric form, “August 22, 2012” which is fine for your reply cards.
Lowercase the “a” in adults. I should note that I recommend that you do not include the word “adults” at all, as this implies that guests do not need to tell you the number of children who will be attending. You could simply do this:
M________________________________ (for the guest(s) to write his/her/their names on the line. They’ll just write the others somewhere else on the card.)
___ will attend
___ unable to attend
The “… save me a beach chair” language is adorable and creative. However, by using it, you have the issue of some invitations needing that to say “… save ME a …” and others needing to say “… save US some …” You can avoid that awkwardness by going the traditional route, if you’re open to that idea. Same thing with your proposed “our beach chairs will be empty” language. If you’re inviting anyone by himself or herself, he or she may think he or she is permitted to bring a date, if the response option says “Our…” See what I mean?
For your insert, the only suggested edits I have are:
*lowercase the “r” in “rooms
*add a comma after the period in “p.m.,” before “with”
Post # 6
@babu22: I totally agree with your recommended edits to her room-block information, hotel information, and wedding website reference!
Post # 7
@babu22: Thanks for the suggestions moni28k! I can’t believe I didn’t think to include the address & phone number. Duh! lol. I will also add our website information on the insert, that is how we plan on communicating a lot of FAQ type information.
@Americano: I agree, good point. We’re nice, but not nice enough to pay for everyone’s rooms too 🙂
@Brielle: Thank you for all your edits Brielle! I didn’t mean to put RSVP in addition to “Kindly Reply” thanks for pointing that out. I would have kicked myself if I sent that to the printer. My biggest issue is communicating that the wedding is “adults only” without saying “Adults Only Reception”. I’m still trying to come up with the right way to word that. You are totally right about the “us’ vs “me” verbiage, I need to think that one through a bit more.
Post # 8
@MissGoldenArches: I do have one more recommendation that you may be interested in considering to help you manage the “adult” reception idea without having to say “adult” reception.
I know most younger bees seem to have little, if any, interest in using inner envelopes. However, I used them, and I did not have a single person bring uninvited children or even contact me to ask if they could bring their uninvited children. (We invited 13 children from our family and bridal party, but no other children were invited.)
I am an avid believer in using inner envelopes for this reason. If John and Jane Doe, who have three children, receive a wedding invitation that says:
Mr. and Mrs. John Edward Doe
Anytown, ST 98765
Mr. and Mrs. Doe
They are extrememly unlikely to think that you also meant to invite anyone else but the two people whose names are on the inner envelope. Also, in our case, for the children we invited, we followed the same format as above for the outer envelopes. However, the inner envelopes for these guests read:
Mr. and Mrs. Doe
Miss Jacqueline Amelia Doe
Master Jared Alexander Doe
Miss Jessica Alexis Doe
If you can consider using inner envelopes at this late date, I would encourage you to do so (just make sure that they’ll definitely fit over your invitation suite and inside your outer envelopes!) Using them not only may save you a lot of grief and concerns over your wording, but also this system is very helpful in avoiding any uninvited “plus ones” or “extra” guests.” I did not have any of them either. If Jane Smith receives an invitation that has her name only on both the outer and inner envelopes, you can bet she will think twice — or more — before ever assuming that she is permitted to bring a “guest.”
I hope everything goes smoothly for you! 🙂