(Closed) wedding invitation address confusion

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
14498 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Typically, the womans name goes first before marriage and last after marriage.

Post # 4
2584 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I know I’m going to run into that problem too. Here’s my plan:

If we’re friends with both of them, write Mr. John Smith and Ms. Jane Jones

If we’re mainly friends with one of them (as in, we don’t know the SO as much and probably wouldn’t invite them if they weren’t dating the friend) we’ll probably write Mr. John Smith and Guest (or Ms. Jane Jones and Guest).

Unless I find out that’s bad etiquette, haha. But I think that would be okay.

Post # 5
271 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I wrote our female friends names first and their SO next (If they had been together for less than 6 months they were addressed to friend and GUEST), unless they were engaged, then the guys name first.  


I think proper etiquette is to put the guys’ name first.

Post # 6
119 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Tricky issue! So, traditionally, you would do your best to find out the name of any single person’s guest and write that on the invitation – people of course do this much less now. But if you are sure of who someone is bringing, as in the case of long-term dating couples, then yes, it is appropriate to put their name on the invitation. The woman’s name always comes first. The only potential problem is if the couple splits up before your wedding and starts seeing other people – you may end up with two additional guests, as each party of the original couple is technically an invited guest and really can’t be uninvited in the event of a breakup. But such a thing is pretty rare, and usually, only the person you’re really friends with ends up coming anyway.

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