Post # 1
Need some serious help with the wording of our invitations.. We’re not having a black-tie affair, but do want to acknowledge our parents & are semi-traditional. Right now, bride’s parents & the couple (us) are paying for most of the wedding… I think my inlaws will contribute some, but aren’t 100% positive because the FI has not asked them yet. He wants a specific budget so we can ask for a certain amount (“would you give us $5,000 to help pay for the photographer/honeymoon/rehearsal dinner, etc?” As opposed to just “will you help us pay for the wedding?” and leaving it up to them to decide amount/what they’ll pay for, etc. FI’s preference & he knows his parents better.) anyways, we want to find the right wording without being super-formal or too casual or too wordy… Here’s the dynamics:
bride & groom are both Army Captains (not dead-set on using our ranks – I feel like everyone at the wedding knows us & I feel like including it makes it too wordy/too many lines)
FOB is retired navy officer (would like to use his title)
MOG & FOG are divorced. FOG is remarried and has been since FI was little.
Wedding is a religious ceremony at a Church.
Any suggestions? I’ve read a bazillion websites but I feel like our situation is too ridiculous to find the right phrasing and saying “Together with their parents/families” doesn’t seem to acknowledge our families enough.
Post # 2
BMidgette: Maybe you need to think outside the box here and focus on what you are really striving to do which is to recognize your family and step parents. You can recognize them in ways just as meaningful or perhaps more so without their names being in the invitations.
Are you having a rehearsal dinner? If so, thank them there. Are you doing a program at your wedding? If yes, capture all of the names, titles, ranks and more of all of the precious people in your life who’ve helped to make your day special. Toast them during the wedding meal too!
Sometimes it really is too hard to capture it all in an invite so perhaps looking at other ways to recognize them is your best bet. In the interim, I like, “Together with their families…”
Post # 3
I would see if fiancé can get them to host RD, and then have their names on the RD invites. Its not clear to me, is fiancé asking his mom, dad or both. If that is the case, I would go with wedding invites saying Captain and Mrs. MOB blah blah blah. Let his family sort out whose names they want on RD invites.
Post # 4
You could do:
Mr and Mrs. MOB
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
son of Mrs. MOG, and (title of father) and Mrs. FOG.
Or, if that “son of” line is too wordy, you could just leave them off. If they are not hosting the wedding they do not need to be mentioned and they could just send out their invitations for the rehearsal dinner.
Side note – be careful about asking FI’s parents for $. I learned that if they wanted to pay they would. Some parents are very traditional (you said you’re semi-traditional) and do not expect to have to pay up for a wedding. I suggest FI only doing so if he is certain it won’t backfire. and i wouldn’t suggest he ask for an amount if he ends up asking. Let them decide what they would like to do, if anything.
Post # 5
- Wedding: September 2014 - Garden outside our church
Here’s my two cents:
Bride, Captain, US Army
Groom, Captain, US Army
children of (or together with their parents)
Rank and Mrs. FOB,
and Mr. and Mrs. FOG
blah blah blah
Just, for heaven’s sake, don’t use hubby’s rank and not yours!