Post # 1
Fiance and I have been renting a condo together for about six years now. I HATE condo/apartment renting and I don’t want to have kids until we are in a place where we can’t hear anyones blender as we walk down the hall! Recently, I’ve really been on a house kick (browsing hours online, visiting open houses, etc.) I’ve realized that if we didn’t have a real wedding we could save $10,000 and put that toward our downpayment. We are paying for the wedding completely on our own, so by putting money one place, we can’t put it in another. We need to save another $45,000 or so to have a traditional downpayment…. not having the wedding with save us 10K, and his parents are giving us 10k as a wedding gift…that puts us 20K closer!!
Would you forsake a wedding (or at least a traditional one) and get into a house faster? Or would you have the wedding and wait a bit longer?
Post # 3
Yes. We wanted to get married ASAP but are waiting to buy our house first. A great offer came up to buy a house for alot less than we ever thought we’d get it for.
We used our wedding fund to complete our down payment. Sometimes it really sucks. I go through should we just Justice of the Peace it or save up and have a wedding in 18 months…
Post # 4
I’m happy that we had our wedding and don’t regret it, but sometimes I look around our condo that we own but can’t sell and wish we had the extra money to put down for a down payment on a house (so we could buy one without selling the condo) or to pay off student loans or to do a bunch of other more fiscally responsible things.
Post # 5
We bought a house after getting engaged and waited to plan the wedding. It’s worked out great so far.
Post # 6
and his parents are giving us 10k as a wedding gift
my only concern is when his folks gifted you the $10K did they have a expectation on it being spent for a wedding?
i would happily forgo a wedding for a house but i wouldnt expect the same from everyone else, i guess it depends on what level your priorities and wants are
Post # 7
I wish we could even think about buying a house… we will be moving so much because of the military so it doesn’t make sense to buy =(
Post # 8
I would chose a house over a wedding, but why would you have to chose? I personally wouldn’t want to spend a lot on a wedding, I would have a small inexpensive one.
Post # 9
We bought the house first, got engaged 5 months later and then had a relatively inexpensive wedding that we paid for ourselves. My parents gave me the choice, house or wedding for the $ they were going to give me, the choice was an easy one for me.
Post # 10
His parents do NOT expect us to spend it on the wedding. They wanted to give it as a gift for newly married life (furniture, house, etc). We had planned to have a small and intimate ceremony anyway, but even that can cost a lot!
I really want a house. I really want a wedding, too…especially since I’ve been “advanced” all my life and missed out on all the typical social milestones. I’m conflicted. I know logically that I should make the financially responsible choice, but I can’t help wanting a wedding, too. We’ve been engaged a year and a half already…so we’ve gotta get married one way or another because this is dragging on too long.
Maybe we could get married now and have a big party/celebration in a year or two…..hmmm…
Post # 11
hmm I think it really depends on your situation. For my hubs and I– our wedding was about $35k and my inlaws paid about $15k. Out of the CASH gifts from out wedding, we made more than what us and my inlaws paid. So in our case, we made money from the wedding and all that money is going towards a future down payment.
If you had your wedding, how long would it take you and your Fiance to save 20k?
Post # 12
Down payments in the bay area (where we are moving this year) are $100,000+, otherwise, yes, we would have gone without a wedding for a house. Our wedding wouldn’t even dent that kind of down payment, so we are doing both (the house is about 2 years away, though)
Post # 13
I would have the wedding, TBH. Once you have a house, house things start to happen. Are you going to put your heart and soul into your wedding still, or is that going to go to the house and the wedding be an after thought?
Your kids will grow up in a house that they will know, and will remember regardless. It’s just a building. A wedding is something they’ll grow up fantasizing about with your pictures. Don’t be afraid to have your dream wedding.
Post # 14
Stacey4884: $20,000 would take approximately half a year to save by the time we paid for all other expenses. Funny thing is, once we have the downpayment, our mortgage will only be as much as our rent is now!
Crayfish: I’m in Seattle, so I know all about crazy home prices! I’m shocked that an average, decent starter home costs $500,000! You need at LEAST $100,000 down to have a suitable downpayment. It’s insane! I’m originally from Tennessee and for $500,000 you could have an estate! I don’t know how people without college degrees can ever afford to have a home in big city!
Post # 15
I would do an adorable, small JofP wedding w/ a restaurant reception ala Mrs. Mary Jane. That being said, I do not in any way regret my “large” (~120 ppl) wedding, but do wish we had more money to throw at our condo so we could pay it off and move. (The housing market is so poor in Chicago that we would get less than 1/2 of what we paid. We’d be able to save majorly on a house in a nearby suburb, but we’d owe the bank on the condo & wouldn’t have a down payment. Quite a “catch 22”. You have to prioritize and do what’s right for you. It sounds like you’d rather buy a house & start a family instead of the wedding hullaballoo. Good luck in your decision.
Post # 16
A house is a home…a wedding is a celebration/party. If we could’ve only afforded one, it would not have been the latter