(Closed) Wedding Party or No Wedding Party – Help me decide….

posted 9 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
705 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

Personally…being in my share of weddings (including my first) I don’t have a use for a bridal party.  I would throw in too that I am having a destination wedding. I just didn’t see the point of asking a group of women to buy a dress and to stand around for 20 minutes during the ceremony. It’s a lot of money.  I did ask one good friend to stand up for me, as did my Fi.  A bridal party just wasn’t our thing.  We want everyone to just come and enjoy! 

No matter what you decide it will be wonderful!!

Post # 4
Member
99 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I’m also an older bride and am not having a wedding party. I just couldn’t imagine a bunch of my girlfriends standing up there in uncomfortable dresses holding flowers. My feeling is that weddings are stressful enough without having to add friends into the process. πŸ™‚

My best friend was married in April and did not have a wedding party either. It did not diminish the wedding in the slightest.

 

Post # 6
Member
359 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I’m 35, and will have no bridal party for our small DW. We do have a MOH and BM, but not in the traditional sense. My MOH is my BFF (all these acronyms!) and is mostly providing moral support. At the ceremony, she will sit with her husband, in a dress of her chosing. FI’s BM, for financial reasons, may not even make the trip. This isn’t my first wedding, and it’s so very much just between FI and I. I haven’t decided whether or not to have my dad walk with me. I just kind of imagine this very ‘alone’ moment with FI, despite our guests…

 

ETA- No party seems to be more common now, so don’t worry about coming off as awkward. Especially in these financial times, I hated the idea of asking folks to spend more money.

Post # 7
Member
1 posts
Wannabee

I’m debating the same issue. I really don’t think I’ll mind not having a bridal party, but I’ve never been to a wedding without one. I’d love to hear what the processionals have been like at the weddings people have attended without a bridal party. 

Post # 9
Member
853 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

i decided early on not to have a bridal party. it’s a small wedding. the friends invited are all very close. picking a bridal party from that would be too in your face. having been a bm many times, i thought my friends would also appreciate not having to buy a dress, pay for shower / party, etc. all that still holds true. i also relish not needing bouquets, bm gifts, etc which help with the budget. it simplified some of the decisons i had to made too.

however, i do miss having people that have to help me out no matter what b/c that’s their job. as my sis reminded me: i chose not to have a bridal party so i can ask people for favors to help me do things around the party but they are not obligated to do so – they can always say no.  i’m not doing a lot of diy so i hope that’s fine. i am worried that on the day my friends will be too busy enjoying themselves to help me if something arises.

Post # 10
Member
195 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I don’t think it has to be an all-or-nothing deal. You can invite your closest friends to stand up with you without having the matchy clothes, extra bouquets or anything like that. Professional photos will be special no matter what – after all, when is the last time you got a professional to take pics of you and your friends? And if you like the get-ups, you could just give them a color scheme and go with that. It doesn’t even have to be that expensive. In my opinion, bridesmaid bouquets, etc. are all just window dressing. My wedding party of one, my lifelong best friend, won’t be carrying a bouquet and I don’t think she could care less. 

That said, if you decide against having a wedding party, you can also invite your friends to participate in other ways. My brother, my fiancé’s sister and a father-type figure will all be doing readings of their own choice at our wedding, and I think they’re stoked to be able to contribute.

Good luck!

Post # 12
Member
751 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

no wedding party it is way to stressful you will end up worry about them more then you do your big day. Its about you and your fi not wedding party dramma and you can easily forget that when you have a stressful wedding party.

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