(Closed) wedding party size advice please???!!!

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
6207 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - The Liberty House

I think it’s kinda silly to have a bigger “junior” wedding party than full fleged bridesmaids and groomsmen. Do you have to have all your first cousins in the wedding party?

Post # 4
1471 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

WOW thats a lot of people to be in your wedding party!! 

We had 75 person wedding, I had 3 brides maids and my husband had 1 best man.  I agree that it is silly to include all these people.  can you incorporate them in another way?  My MOHs kids are really special to me, we are like family so her two sons were the escorts and they LOVED it, my husbands nieces passed out the bubbles and rice to the guests along with the programs.  Can you find little jobs like that for them to do?? 

I think its best to keep the wedding party intimate

Post # 6
258 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I think that sounds like a lot, but if it means a lot to you, you could make it work.

Our wedding had 125 guests.  4 bridesmaids, 4 groomsmen, 2 flower girls and 1 ring bearer.

My 4 bridesmaids had plenty of trouble organizing amongst themselves(rumor/complaint mill says) for the bridal shower and I guess picking shoes and arguing about hairstyle and stuff.  So in my opinion, the less cooks in the kitchen, the better! 

I love that you are trying to include so many family members. I let my two brothers watch as regular guests, same with my cousins, and no one felt put out.  Maybe you could have all the kids do something else to be involved, like hand out programs and direct people to their seats?  Or do something at the reception?  It just sounds like a lot of people to have go buy matching outfits just so they can walk down the aisle and then move out of the way.  Just my personal opinion though. Again, every wedding is different and I’m sure either way can work fine. 

My only real advice, don’t ask the extra people until you are sure one way or the other.  Because once you ask, you can’t take it back. 

Post # 7
2693 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

If you want them in the wedding party, have them in the wedding party: I would not do the whole junior thing.  Make it so that they dont feel obligated to be In the wedding though…let them know you would love for them be play a role but it’s up to them if they want to or not.  They way they can decide without feeling pressured or guilted.

I am having 6 bm and 4 gm.  I am hopong for 150 guests.

By The Way there are olther ways to include your cousins in the wedding by having them read a Bible verse, or favorite poem or movie/song quote.  If anyone is super talented, they could sing or play an instument.

Post # 8
332 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

All those ppl make me cringe, lol. Is there other roles they can do?

Post # 9
1471 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@julyweddinglovebirds:  I had gotten boutonniers for the boys, they LOVED them.  Me and their mom, who was my Maid/Matron of Honor discussed it…. they both wore dark khaki pants, white button up shirts, pink and white stripped ties (which matched the bridesmaids dresses) and dark blue sports coats.  They looked so good!!!  The girls wore what they wanted to, and had matching white capes, it was a bit chill out so they looked cute.  You can alwasy get the girls like some type of corsage or something that matches what everybody else has!!

Post # 10
9552 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

That’s a really big bridal party, but if it’s what you want, go for it! But I would definately consider finding other things for them to do.

Post # 11
3886 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Honestly, the larger the bridal party (juniors included), the greater the chance for drama. 

Post # 12
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I do not think you should have “jr wedding party”

Post # 16
1600 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I think it’s sweet that you guys want to include your cousins in your wedding day, but with so many of them and such a wide age range, it doesn’t seem practical or really even necessary, especially since your wedding is relatively small.

The thing you have to remember is that your BMs are supposed to be people who have always “been there” for you, helped you, supported you, and will help with wedding stuff. Not saying they are going to need to be slaves, but they will help you pick out decor, put together centerpieces, invites, throw you a shower, help you with your hair/dress/makeup on the big day. Little ones (and maybe even teenagers) can’t really do that stuff. Not saying they aren’t important, but they may not be able to fill the role of a full fledged Bridesmaid or Best Man.

Making them “junior” BMs (or groomsmen) doesn’t really make sense either, In My Humble Opinion. Would it really be worth them spending money on dresses, tuxes, hair, shoes, makeup, etc to just have a title for the day?  

There are probably several other things the cousins can do on the big day. Make the older ones escorts or ushers or have them do a reading or hand out programs. And I’m sure they’d be willing to help you decorate and/or put together last minute favors, etc. the night or week before. This way they can be involved without making it a whole big production.

If I were you, I’d have 3 BMs and 3 groomsmen and just think of creative ways to involve the cousins.  It would be less stressful on them, their families, AND you.


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