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wedding pet peeves

posted 4 years ago in Beehive
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    Busy bee
    TallBride    January 24 2009   Westlake Village, Ca

    Bored at school..... What are your biggest pet peeve regarding the wedding????

    Mine is all of the junk mail I get from attending a Bridal show.. such a waste!

     
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    Busy bee
    BunnyBlue    03/7/09   Sunny South Florida

    I agree , I hate the junk mail .


       But my biggest pet peeve has to be people telling me not to get married.
    I understand that not all relationships work out and that some people have really bad experiences , but stop raining on my parade! Most of this advise is coming from people that barely know me, and know NOTHING about my Fiance. I just want to tell them " I'm wearing my Big Girl Pants today and I think I can decide how to live my life!." But I usually just smile at them for being so sage...

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    Newbee
    wondermart    June 08   virginia

    My FMIL : (

     
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    MissBlueBear    March 2008   New York

    My mom telling me I was spending way too much on the little stuff that nobody would notice and I should really have a more affordable Chinese Banquet....blah blah blah....but I did it my way and had a blast...so at the end of the day...she was the biggest nag in the world...but I got the wedding I wanted!

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    1. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img table_runner_1.jpg (44.2 KB, 62 downloads) 2 years old
    2. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img table_runner_2.jpg (39.2 KB, 70 downloads) 2 years old
     
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    Sugar bee
    rosychicklet    September 27, 2008   Boston, MA

    RSVPs.  People don't get back to you, don't read instructions, rudely ask you to extend invitations to significant others, children, etc.  The list goes on and on.

    Attachments

    1. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img 232323232fp536_6_nu=3356_539_774_WSNR.jpg (54.2 KB, 88 downloads) 2 years old
    2. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img moss_balls.jpg (19.9 KB, 85 downloads) 2 years old
     
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    kleverkira    June 7, 2008   Nashville, TN

    People (even normally computer literate people, not just my grandparents) who don't go to the wedding website. The invitation says that ALL the information is there. I can't tell you how many people have called my mom asking if we're going to send out hotel information. ARGH!

    Also, people waiting too long to make travel arrangements and then expecting us to bail them out.

     
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    Helper bee
    staceyb    may 10, 2008   los angeles

    people who insist i must be nervous/freaking out/depressed over the loss of my single life... well i haven't been "single" for a while, and i'm sure i'll get more anxious as it gets closer, but if i'm not worried right now, why insist that i must be?!

     
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    Worker bee
    bklyngirl      

    my parents opinion about everything and also feeling a bit guilty about spending all their money on this wedding!

     
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    Bumble bee
    Angel    July 15, 2005   Snohomish County, Washington State

    People calling the day before to ask for directions. You had two months people! I provided the name of the venue and the address for our web savvy guests, and the manager of the IT department had to have me print out directions for him. Sheesh.

    Attachments

    1. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img damask3.jpg (116.3 KB, 59 downloads) 2 years old
     
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    TallBride    January 24 2009   Westlake Village, Ca

    Oh I thought of another one... the "YES DEAR" jokes.... why do people have the need to tell them over and over again????

     
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    tarallilove    9/13/2008   NYC

    How about vendors thinking wedding = ripping people off? I'm up to my ears in estimates that are more than twice the budget that we gave the vendor.  Grr.

     
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    GetMarried4Less    November 1st, 2008   SC

    - my fsil.

    - being told over and over that jus tbc we are inviting people doesnt mean they will show up. i am not thinking i can hedge my bet on that with nearly 300 people on my guest list and only a 130 count given to my caterer.

     

     
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    ErinMarieMack    06.27.09   Denver, CO

    We are paying for 1/2 of the wedding ourselves (My parents are paying for the other.) and I am sick of not having money to spend on anything else. I could scale back, but that wouldn't be fun;)

     
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    LisaL2B    June 7, 2008   Copley, Ohio

    Both moms. 

    My mom who keeps telling me she wants to help.  She forgets that I have asked her to do things, given her multiple lists, reminded her a half dozen times to get the stuff done and then, weeks later, just end up doing it myself.  I finally stopped asking as it was less effort and hassle for me to just do it myself from the start.  So now she's complaining to friends and relatives that I won't let her do anything!  UGH!

    FMIL who is almost completely uninterested in the wedding.  What little she has offered to do, she just takes the quickest and easiest option just to get it done.  FI and I have tried to nicely refuse her offers to pay for anything so that we can do things the way that we want them but she's insisting she's going to "do her part". 

     
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    missrae      

    ^^ that's pretty bad when you have to almost bribe your MIL to do things the way you want them... sheesh! i wouldn't be so generous to even offer :)

     
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    Candi1024    05/24/2008   Hunlock Creek, PA

    My parents are paying for a lot, so I have been open to suggestions.

    But two of the things I am paying for, the DJ and the photographer, I am doing my way!!   My mother started to tell me what kind of music to play, and I told her it is between me and my FI and we will decide.  She warned me that I better not pick the wrong music or the whole wedding will be a FLOP!!!!

    Does she really think I'm going to try to pick music nobody likes?  So I told her we are going to play all polka  :)

     
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    sweettea    October 4, 2008  

    How any & everything related to weddings is at least 3x the fair market value.  I have had it up to here with overpriced vendors that try to convince me that I should splurge with them because I'm worth it & it's my big day. 

    Hello?  I already know what I'm worth- and I don't need a hefty price tag to prove it to anyone.  I've stayed sane by not anchoring my heart to any idea or concept until I know how it fits into my budget.

     
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    Sweeney2Be    Aug 23, 2008   Twin Cities Minnesota

    Yes junk mail, especially from the formalwear shop I already booked at. They send stuff asking me to use them...HELLO - duh!

    Aside from that, peoples constant "Calm Downs" and "DOn't worries" yes, spoken with best of intention are highly aggravating and make me want to shake people. Do not make it seem like I'm over reacting when I am trying to please 200 guessts, cover 3 traditions, pay for party I can't afford and hand make all my peper items. It's a big deal, it's are really big deal!

    LOL 

     

    Especially when I just casually mention "Oh BM didn't get the dress today" immidate "calm donw" like I'm going to blow or something. 

    UG! 

     
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    knudsonwedding    May 10, 2008   Ottawa, Canada

    My mother - Any time I ask her to do anything, she says she'll do it, and after many, many reminders....she still doesn't do it, and I have to do it myself.

    My MOH - From what I can tell, she is extremely jealous of something, and is acting like a complete B**CH. She keeps making mean comments (but acting like she's joking) and telling me that everything I want for my wedding is stupid, and how she would do it differently. She also says that I won't let her do anything to help, but the one time she's offered help, I said "Oh, yeah, we could really use some help assembling the invites". Her reply was "Oh, I never want to see another invitation again. I'll tell you what, you don't have to give me one...that should save you some time"

    Anyways, I'm just letting it slide off my back, but those are my pet peeves.

     
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    wisterialily      

    My biggest pet peeves so far are the constant calls from vendors that got my phone number when I went to David's Bridal and my mother and MIL--they keep saying, 'Whatever you want is fine with us'...if that was the case, then why are they always telling me that we should do it their way??

     
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    Helper bee
    Candi1024    05/24/2008   Hunlock Creek, PA

    wisterialily

    I agree, thats the worst.  "It's your wedding, you can do it anyway you want to do it"  That is, unless they disagree.  My mother is actually pretty good with this, it's my sister(MOH) that argues with me about everything.

     
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    Bumble bee
    caliocteach    8/9/2008   California
    • overpriced and overly arrogant vendors
    • lack of customer service
    • my mom (my fmil is great!) -- my mom questions every single decision I make!!!
    • my fh not helping with anything and then interjecting
    • everyone else who does not understand the work that goes behind planning a wedding
    • family that is more concerned about "how things will look" and "what others will think" than they are about my happiness
    • people that act like a wedding website is such an unusual and odd thing
    • people that give me crap about printing my invitation envelopes using my ink jet printer instead of doing them by hand
    • feeling like I must hire someone to do my make-up

    Attachments

    1. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img weddings-3.jpg (31.6 KB, 6 downloads) 2 years old
    2. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img weddings-2.jpg (38.5 KB, 6 downloads) 2 years old
    3. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img weddings-1.jpg (37.8 KB, 6 downloads) 2 years old
     
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    BunnyBlue    03/7/09   Sunny South Florida

    Sorry , another one. 

          
           People insisting that I want to " Feel like a princess."  Nothing against princesses , but I'm not one . I want to feel like ME! Stop trying to put that dern tiara on me!!

         

     
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    Cynthia    9/27/08   Redwood City

    -guests making me feel like a total evil witch for not having any children under 16 at the wedding.

    -the fact that EVERYTHING costs a minimum of $1000.00

    I think that is it for now...I still have 5 months to add to this list.wedding pet peeves :  wedding Icon Razz 

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    1. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img M_sendoff_crop_0.jpg (126.9 KB, 17 downloads) 2 years old
    2. wedding pet peeves :  wedding Img ceremony_site_464x444.jpg (82.6 KB, 19 downloads) 2 years old
     
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    NorCalBride    09/21/2008   East Bay

    Where do I begin...

    • The junk snail mails and emails
    •  The mention of the word "Wedding" and the prices doubles!
    • FSIL,FGMIL
    • Parents keep adding on their friends and keeps increasing our guestlist
    • People keep asking both of us if we're getting scared... We've been with eachother for 7yrs, seen eachother at our worst and best days... true colors... inside out... Dealt with financial issues but yes I'm scared.. WTH?!?!?
    • Been asked why would you get married it's just a really expensive stupid party.
    • Comments to my FH: "GLuck... guess we won't see you anymore" which I think is soooooooooo insulting especially since it's from some loser that doesn't even know me!
    • Getting nasty comments when I mention FI will see eachother before the ceremony which I know don't mention ever again... Nobody really needs to know
    • FI's family member who's trying to take over my MOH's duties eventhough she's a billion yrs old and not even part of the bridal party!
    I think that's all for now... Maybe we should start a post with things we love about our big daywedding pet peeves :  wedding Icon Biggrin

     
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    Worker bee
    virginia    11-08-08   florida

    here's the worst for me, FH's friend constantly bringing up the stress of the wedding.  i want to spray mace on him and tell him never to talk to me again.  i keep trying to cut him from the list, but no luck

     on a positive note, i love my dress!!!!

     
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    erinfutureH    12/27/08   Houston

    How about when everyone keeps asking us "when we are going to have kids?" and then when I say "not for 5 years or so" getting a reaction like I am a freak of nature because I don't want to immediately pop out children. Why is it assumed that we are going to start having kids just because we are getting married?

     
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    amysue    6/6/09  

    - people who hassle me about changing my name. no, i don't feel like i'm losing my identity.

    - people who hassle me about having a diamond ring. yes, i love it. no, i don't think of oppressed africans every time i look at it. have you checked the tags on your clothes lately? i can almost guarantee they were made in a sweatshop somwhere.

    - people who hassle me about not wanting to hand address envelopes. my handwriting is wretched. if people feel like being invited to the wedding isn't personal or thoughtful enough without handwritten ink, then hopefully they won't come.

    - people who say "just pay somebody to do it!" if you're not going to give me the money, then keep your mouth shut.

    - people who criticize ideas i'm excited about. i'm rapidly learning not to share wedding-related things i like with anybody. everybody's got something negative to say.

    - people who have the gall to suggest that because we're having a civil ceremony our marriage is somehow less meaningful.

     
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    NorCalBride    09/21/2008   East Bay

    amysue: If you want a civil ceremony then go for it! wedding pet peeves :  wedding Icon Biggrin

    Update:

    • How about people who keep asking you if they're invited. I'm sure you all have had some of those. The worst is last year when I was at a FUNERAL for a 3yr old and this couple who happens to be FI's sisters' friend came up and asked us where's their invite! How rude is that?! First of all you're friends of my FH's younger sisters (making your chances very slim for being on the GL) and second we were at a funeral... The last thing I want to think about is if you're on our guestlist or not.
    • People thinking about this event as some big house party. I'm not going to post fliers around the neighborhood. This is our wedding! If I don't know you by first and last name there's a slim chance you're coming. 
    To be continued....

     
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    virginia    11-08-08   florida

    i agree about not wanting to share details...everyone has an opinion! (but then they get mad when you keep quiet) 

    also the dreaded guest list.  people come out of the woodwork when you are planning a wedding!  i have been very good about inviting people i know and interact with.  FH has not and we cannot cut people from his list (his family's wishes) so i point out constantly why we have to invite certain people.   an example....FH's stepmom says we have to invite so and so because it will hurt her feelings.  well so and so is having a wedding for her daughter and we are not invited!!!!!! (not that i would want to go, but still)  she wanted to keep her list small.  wedding pet peeves :  wedding Icon Mad

     

     
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    piperbenjamin    June 2008   Philly

    ooh, this is a great post!

    - people who act like i should spend more on my dress bc it's my wedding AND people who act like i spent too much on my dress bc i'll only wear it once

    - FMIL who "finished" their guest list around christmas but just added "max 8 people" the day before we finished our invites

    - people who dont get that we can't invite everyone & their mom to our wedding. we cant invite whole offices of people just because they might get offended. if i invited you to our last house party 3 months pre-wedding & you said you'd come & didnt, or just didnt respond to my email, then you dont get to come to our WEDDING! it's for people who like to hang with us regardless of occasion.

    -people who got std's half a year ago that havent spoken with us since & now we still have to invite. i have a serious love/hate relationship with stds because of this.

    - people assuming that they should be invited because they asked a question about the wedding & i answered it

    - people who keep nagging me to book things & take care of things when i clearly have a giant list of things to do & will get to it when i can. not offering help, just nagging. not everything is as important to everyone... for example, we rushed to get our registry done which we were nagged to death about, and noone has gotten anything off it!

     
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    piperbenjamin    June 2008   Philly

    OHHHHHHHHH! how could i forget- my BIGGEST BIGGEST pet peeve:

    "are you changing your name?"

     none of your business!

    i have gotten this so many times i started telling people my FI is changing his name to mine bc i'ts shorter. shuts people up. i dont know why this bothers me so much & it probably wouldnt if i was gung-ho about changing my name, but im unsure & i just HATE it, seriously hate it when random people ask, that have no business asking.

     
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    prettykatie    March 14, 2009   Oklahoma

    My pet peeve as of this moment is the catty comments people will make. Apparently my diamond is so small that I should have refused FI's proposal, I don't deserve to wear white to our wedding because we are living together, and we shouldn't get married anyway because all marriages fail miserably. And after people say these things to me, they ask if they're invited!

     
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    Blushing bee
    bethgraced    06/14/2008   Chicago

    My FMIL makes me feel nervous every time I look at her.  I should point out that she's a Filipino Catholic woman and I'm a Scandinavian Protestant... a good bit of our clashes are cultural. 

    She used to ask about having a priest officiate, why we aren't having sponsors, and how we should open the gifts right after the reception (uhm, he** no.  I'm going to be rolling around on a bed, from either tiredness or... not wedding pet peeves :  wedding Icon Biggrin).  She also wass constantly asking if I've thought about transportation, how I'm going to wear my hair, if we invited so-and-so (I don't know, did you give me their name and address when I asked for it SIX MONTHS AGO?!). And no matter my answer - she had a criticism for me.  Either she'd tell me I'd better do it soon (hello? you don't think I'm working on it? you don't think these things are rolling around in my head all day while I'm at work and can't do anything about it?) or say 'Good because if you don't people will think, blah blah blah' (okay, I get it - it's more important that everyone else is happy than us.)  She also used to bug me about getting a Catholic priest to co-officiate.  I don't have anything against Catholocism, but feel like they have a problem with me because I can't take communion bc I don't believe the same things they do.  I don't want to have someone officiate if they think my faith is wrong and that God won't bless my marriage because I'm not Catholic.  Sheesh.

    Oddly enough, she's eerily quiet now... it's nice. :D 

     
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    Helper bee
    staceyb    may 10, 2008   los angeles

    prettykatie, my roommate said the same thing about my ring!! let's just say, that was the beginning of our troubles... and a good sign of things to come. fortunately, i move out this weekend. :)

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