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Wedding Regrets

posted 2 years ago in Newlyweds
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    1.
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    236 posts
    Helper bee
    MissMelissaB    8/8/09   Temecula, CA

    Is anyone else having regrets about their wedding?  I'm not upset about who I married, but I am sad about some of the decisions that were made in the planning process.  

    I was already a little upset about our invitations . . . I had issues with every step and by the end of it, I was so depressed about them.  My mom has also told me that she didn't like them so naturally I felt even worse about them than I did before.

    I'm also regretting my dress.  I actually really like my dress, but after a while it kind of stretched out in the chest area.  In the non-pro pictures it looks so sloppy to me because my dress doesn't fit.  I'm hoping it will look better in the pro photos, since these are supposed to be pictures of the happiest day of my life!

    Do any of you feel the same way about only seeing the flaws at your wedding?

     
    2.
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    Sugar bee
    SanDiegoAli    September 18, 2010   San Diego

    Well, I'm not married yet, but I'm sorry you're feeling this way.  I guess the silver lining is that you're married to the man of your dreams, and thats the whole point of the wedding right?  It's ok to feel let down about certain aspects of your day, just don't let it overwhelm you.

     
    3.
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    Helper bee
    sjbee    6/20/2009   Los Angeles/ SF Bay Area

    Oh sweetie, I am sorry you feel this way. Trust me I went through the same thing. At first I was so happy to be married, and wanted everything about the weddding to be perfect so I tired to ignore the little things that bugged me. Then it all came back (about 3 weeks later) in this "I can't pretend anymore, so many things went wrong wave." Any then, once I had admitted it out loud I got over it. The pro pics came and they were gorgeous (just like your's will be) and I remembered all the wonderful, perfect things about the day. And now, two months out, those are the memories that are left. I have to strain to remember what went wrong, and the guests I have talked to never even noticed in the first place. You will get there too.

     
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    Bumble bee
    mdarrah    4/4/09   Los Angeles, CA

    There were some things that didnt go right, adn some things i'd change if i did it again... but im married and we had a great time so all the less than wonderful details can just fade into forgotten.

     
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    Buzzing bee
    mary-alice-me    May 24, 2009   Kentucky

    Oh, it's a bad feeling to look back on the day with anything less than pleasure. I'm sorry your mom knocked your invitations!

    I'd suggest trying to think of all the happy parts of your day and focusing on that, even writing it down if you like to keep a journal or scrapbook/ album kind of thing. I'm sure you'll be able to get a handful of really good photos, too.

    I had some wedding regrets but I'm pretty much over them by now. I chalk it up to having such a short engagement and not really figuring out everything I wanted to do in time. That's probably why I'm still hanging out at Weddingbee. I was really upset at the photos (partially my fault, that I just stood there and smiled instead of posed or did anything fun) and also upset because it seemed like DH wasn't smiling in them. Well, I was only taking a couple of examples, and it's not true, he was smiling. I was also pretty upset that people wanted to leave early (I had friends who came from out of town and left to go to the movies!!!!), but that doesn't take away from the time I had with those who stayed.

    Chin up, and hey - you've got the important part down! You're married to the person you love.

     
    6.
    2,299 posts
    Buzzing bee
    bluespurrs    August 7, 2009   South-central PA, USA, Earth

    In general, our wedding was outstanding and everything I hoped for! But I kinda gave up dieting at the end and picures of me clearly show back fat! Gee I hope the guests weren't as fixated as me! Plus in some of my close-ups, I look really old and I can't help wondering if professional make-up would have helped.

     
    7.
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    Bee Keeper
    eloping    May 23, 2010  

    although we eloped, i wished we booked a pro photographer because weve been married for 2 months now and the pics are still in the stupid camera card thingy and people have given up asking about them

    otherwise im blessed to say no other regrets so try not to dwell too much on the negs

     

     
    8.
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    Honey
    Beekeeper
    ejs4y8    June 20, 2009  

    I just wish I had lied to my parents and told them we needed to be ready 30 minutes earlier. Then we'd have been on time =]

    I bet your "flaws' become more trivial as time goes on. at least you kojnw it's not that important in the big scheme of things =]

     

     
    9.
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    Buzzing bee
    cannotwait    February 1, 2009   TX

    I'd be really surprised if someone didn't have a SINGLE regret.  We have so many options in our life, and we are surrounded by photos of seemingly perfect weddings...it can really whack out a bride's expectations!

    I hope it provides some solace that, like others above, these flaws really do fade over time and you move on with the other parts of your relationship.  If photos are the main problem, you can always do a reshoot, too....right after the wedding I thought I would, but now I don't care! (not that my photographer wasn't amazing, I just wanted some different locations)

     
    10.
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    Bumble bee
    fizicsGirl    8/1/2009   Michigan

    Definitely...I think it's natural when you plan such a big event and invest so much into it.  But please don't let it dominate your memories of the day.  And as PP have said, I'm sure the negative memories will fade with time.

    For regrets, I've got two:

    1. I should not have trusted my parents to do *anything* on their own.  There are several things that I'm pretty sure I checked with them like 10 times within the last two weeks on, and they either didn't get done or happened badly at the last minute.  The most egregious was the seating chart.  We put it together about 5 days before (Tuesday night for a Saturday wedding), but there were a few stragglers amongst my parents friends that they were still working out.  Well they said they would finish those and print out the name cards (I also put my brother on it).  I have no idea what happened, but all of the tables we put together ended up slightly changed (a married couple was put at two different tables)...and they were still finishing it during the cocktail hour! 

    2. Our DJ was a huge disappointment.  He came super highly reviewed.  And he was more expensive than average.  But I'm literally astonished at how poor of a job he did.

    But even with all of that...it was a great day!  We had fun, and so did our guests.  They keep telling us what a blast it was.  I'm guessing that they have no idea what was going on in the background (except for that couple that got separated).  And guess what, we're married!

     
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    Wannabee
    pixie40    7/09   Ohio

    I am definitely feeling this way about a thing or two and I am glad reading these posts that I am not the only one! My biggest regret is that I didnt spend more time with guests. I found myself dancing the entire night with the bridal party (which I dont regret), but do feel like I should have taken some more time to chat with people. All in all, everyone says they had a great time and they dont notice the few hiccups along the way. Am sad that I dont get to wear my dress again! :)

     

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