Post # 1
Help! My best friend and maid of honor at my wedding, (I am her matron of honor) apparently loved my wedding ideas, because 85% of the wedding is the same!!! From the shower location to the favors to the method of transportation. Most of the stuff you can name is the same as mine! I know mockery can be a form of flattery but we DO NOT have the same style whatsoever! Am I overreacting or should I tell her to find the style she fits with. Please give me some advice on what I should do, it’s not only me other people have said something to me including my husband!
Post # 3
Is your wedding already over?
I see that it is. My advice would be to get over it. I doubt any of your wedding ideas were origional (everyone gets inspiration from everyone else) and she obviously thought you did a great job. Your wedding was one day, not a concept you have ownership of for life.
I bet it feels pretty awkward, but you don’t really have the right to tell her to “quit it”
Post # 4
@Baillie2b: Let it go. It’s just a wedding. You don’t have rights to those ideas.
Post # 5
I dont really see how this is a problem if your wedding is already over? I would think you should be flattered that she liked your wedding so much???
Post # 6
@Baillie2b: Sorry, but I’m in the boat that you don’t get to say that nobody else gets to do the things you did at your wedding. I guarantee you weren’t the first one to do these things. You got the idea from somebody else as well. There are only so many good wedding ideas out there. Especially when things are occuring around the same time and so are likely caught up in similar trends. I have no idea what your wedding was like and what ideas she is repeating, but if it involved anything with mason jars, burlap, lace, vintage, rustic, teacups, yellow/gray, pomanders, flowers in water, etc. then it’s probably just that stuff is trendy now. Don’t read too much into it. And even if the ideas start in the same place, your friend’s wedding is likely to come out with their spin on it anyway. But most of all, your wedding is over. Everybody enjoyed your wedding. Now it’s time to celebrate your friend’s wedding. If others think she’s copying you, it’s no skin off your back. Just try to be happy for your friend and helpful in her planning.
Post # 8
@Baillie2b: She should be able to have whatever type style wedding she wants. Who cares if it is just like yours? Let her do what she wants. If it just so happens she ended up liking the same ideas as you, so be it. What is the harm, who will care other than you? Don’t worry about things like this! There are many more things to worry about, not the theme of your MOH’s wedding.
Post # 9
@JenGirl: Agreed. If you had a LOTR-themed wedding or a steampunk wedding with full regalia, that would be one thing, but if you got most of your ideas from Pinterest, I think you implicitly sign away your right to complain when someone else has a similar wedding.
It’d be one thing if she was taking your ideas and using them for a wedding that occurred BEFORE yours. But yours is over. If it’s really that similar, people will recognize it as replication. If they don’t, it was probably just coincidence to begin with. I’d keep my mouth shut if I were you. Besides, she obviously thinks you have great taste.
Post # 10
Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery. You had a beautiful wedding and she loved it so much, she wants to do it again!
Post # 11
Most weddings look a lot alike.
Honestly, I can’t remember most of the themes are decorations, etc at most of the weddings I’ve been to..
I wouldn’t worry about it.
Post # 12
@Baillie2b: Ok, I’m going to go against all of the comments here. What ideas are she using that you used? I feel like we need more details before people can tell you to be quiet and not think anything of it. My best friend got married before me and I made sure to plan our wedding so that they werent similar, I kind of felt obligated to chose a different color, etc. Especially since your friend has obvious taste differences! How far out is her wedding? I can see how you would be slightly frustrated for sure.
Post # 13
I do agree that I definitely searched wedding ideas and got many ideas from different places and yes many people have used the ideas I have used also but we are friends and there are A LOT of people that went to our wedding. It’s just that with sooooo many ideas out there you would think she would go more her style. I mean come on! Our theme was basically Miami meets Scranton I used a trolley for our transportation, wine corks for place card holders lanterns filled with sand and candles, candy bar favor, cupcakes from an out of town venue, etc. etc. and the shower venue you have to be a member for…Her wedding is supposed to be a vintage, rustic theme soooo I guess that’s why I’m confused as well. There are
Post # 14
@OldMrsMcDonald: ++++ “imitation is the most sincere form of flattery” My mom used to tell me that ALL the time while I was growing up. I used to get so upset when someone would buy the same shoes I had or the same backpack. But over time and as I got older I began to not take it to heart and realized it really is flattery.
Your wedding is over. I would just take it as a HUGE compliment that she is using “your ideas”. I mean if you had really great vendors, etc and things went smoothly why wouldn’t she want to use the same as you. We all do vendor reviews for that exact reason, so others know what they are getting. Obviously she knows what she’s getting if she uses the same as you.
I would be frustrated too but trust me you and your guests know your wedding was first and also know that you had the ideas first. Try to just think of it that way…..
Post # 15
let it go. your wedding is over. she can do whatever she wants for hers.
Post # 16
I would let it go. When she gets the pics back, she’ll be the one saddled with regret that she wasn’t more original. By that time, you likely won’t care.
I bet that feels really annoying though.