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Wedding Vows vs. Exchanging of the rings?

posted 2 years ago in Ceremony
  • 1 Members Subscribed To Topic
  • poll: Are wedding vows and exchanging of the rings the same thing?
    YES : (0 votes)
    NO : (37 votes)
    97 %
    OTHER-- SEE RESPONSE BELOW : (1 votes)
    3 %
  •  
    1.
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    661 posts
    Busy bee
    Habibah14    October 24, 2010   Fairfield County, Connecticut

    I know this seems like a super dumb question but are these the same thing? I have seen them used in the same context. I am planning out the ceremony and wondering if there are 2 seperate things or really just the same?

    For example, I've seen people do their vows... and then do the rings and just say "With this ring, I thee wed" or whatever after the vows... then other times people have done it in one swoop!

    Any clarification would be awesome! THANKS!

     
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    MissAsB    June 6, 2009   Married in CO, Living in AL

    Usually you exchange the rings after you say your vows.  The officiant says something about the rings and what they mean and have you say something while putting the ring on your FI's finger.

     
    3.
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    1,346 posts
    Bumble bee
    gocubbies       Illinois

    I am breaking it up into two things! Here are some thing for our wedding to give you an idea of the "timeline", so to speak :)

    Part of our program:

    {Declaration of Intent}I do.

    {Exchange of Vows}

    {Interlude}Happy Everafter In Your Eyes : Ben Harper

    {Exchange of Rings}These hands

    Here's a snippet from our ceremony transcript

    Do you, Aaron, take Leigh to be your lawful wedded wife?

    I do.

    Do you, Leigh, take Aaron to be your lawful wedded husband?

    I do.

    VOWS
    (my vows) (his vows)

    SONG
    (Happy Everafter In Your Eyes, Ben Harper)

    Let us now exchange rings.

    “These are the hands of your best friend, young and strong and full of love for you, that are holding yours on your wedding day, as you promise to love each other today, tomorrow, and forever. These are the hands that will work alongside yours, as you build your future together. These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through the years, and with the slightest touch, will comfort you like no other. These are the hands that will hold you when fear or grief fills your mind. These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes; tears of sorrow, and as in today, tears of joy. These are the hands that will tenderly hold your children, the hands that will help you to hold your family as one. These are the hands that will give you strength when you need it. And lastly, these are the hands that even when wrinkled and aged, will still be reaching for yours, still giving you the same unspoken tenderness with just a touch.”

    Aaron , place the ring on Leigh's finger and please repeat after me.

    I give you this ring as a symbol of my commitment to you.It has no beginning and it has no end.May its presence on your hand always remind you of my eternal love

    Aaron and Leigh, May you live happily ever after. May all your days be blessed with love and friendship. May each day and night of your lives be a new beginning.

    By the power vested in me by the state of Illinois, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.

     
    4.
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    Bumble bee
    grace8367    September 6, 2009   Chicago

    They are different but often come right after one another during the ceremony- the ring being a symbol of the vows.

     
    5.
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    809 posts
    Busy bee
    prettyflowers    September 2010  

    In my mind, the wedding vows are where you are promising each other ... whatever you are promising them.  Sickness/health, richer/poorer, forsaking all others etc.

    The exchange of rings is just the part of the ceremony where you put them on each other's finger (sometimes couples might say "with this ring, I thee wed").

     
    6.
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    Busy bee
    Habibah14    October 24, 2010   Fairfield County, Connecticut

    @gocubbies-- those are so beautiful thanks for sharing!

    thanks for the input!

     
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    Bumble bee
    SweetAdelineXO    June 5, 2010   NJ

    We are doing vows first and then exchanging rings.

     
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    Helper bee
    Professor    April 10, 2010   New York, NY

    So, in a lot of Jewish ceremonies there really isn't a recitation of vows. There is the exchange of rings and Hebrew phrases that go along with it. So I guess I see them as two very different things.

     
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    Busy bee
    WDWBride    March 3, 2010   Walt Disney World

    Here is how ours went: (P.S. I voted No)

    Vows
    (Repeat after me)

    I Eric, take you, Amanda to be my wife, in friendship and in love, in strength and weakness, to share the good times and misfortune, in achievement and failure, and to celebrate life forevermore.

    I Amanda, take you, Eric to be my husband, in friendship and in love, in strength and weakness, to share the good times and misfortune, in achievement and failure, and to celebrate life forevermore.

    Ring Vows
    (Repeat After Me)

    I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and faithfulness. As I place it on your finger, I commit my heart and soul to you. I ask you to wear this ring as a reminder of the vows we have spoken today, our wedding day.

    Engagement Ring

    The engagement ring is a symbol of promise and intention. Now the intention is realized and the promise fulfilled, please place your engagement ring on Amanda’s finger, over her wedding band to symbolize that the love that brought you together will always protect and sustain your marriage.

     
    10.
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    Busy bee
    Habibah14    October 24, 2010   Fairfield County, Connecticut

    ooo love the engagement ring idea... stealing it! never thought about incorporating it!

     
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    naangel55    June 20, 2009   Long Beach, CA

    We said our "I Do's" and the exchanged rings with the vows, similar to what gocubbies did.

     
    12.
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    743 posts
    Busy bee
    WDWBride    March 3, 2010   Walt Disney World

    That was one of my favorite parts of our ceremony!

     
    13.
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    46 posts
    Newbee
    Secret99    July 31, 2010  

    WDWBride...ummmm stealing your whole thing, it's PERFECT!!!

     
    14.
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    860 posts
    Busy bee
    Firie    September 21, 2012   Australia

    I'm not sure of the legal requirements in the US. 

    But in Australia, the vows while they can be personalised need to have certain statements in them by law.  I believe they have to contain each person's full name at least once. Must include the words husband and wife. And must be a declaration in front of everyone present that you intend to enter into marriage and do so willingly. 

    And the swapping of rings is totally optional.  It can be missed all together, or done in anyway the couple choose.  So for my part, I voted no because at least here in Australia legally and traditionally they are two very different things.  :)

     

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