Weight watchers/thanksgiving/unsupportive family

posted 2 years ago in Fitness
Post # 2
Member
1566 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

lfranke:  My best advice is to make it so that how much you’re eating is not something people notice.

Get up, help set the table, iron napkins (if you have cloth napkins), clear dishes, do the dishes, check on others and see if they need anything, go outside and play with the kids (if there are any), see if anyone wants to go for a walk outside between dinner and pie to enjoy the fall weather.

Most of these will make people grateful that you are helping out and notice that you’re busy and taking a lot of pressure off of the hostess. The kids (if you go to play with them) will think that you’re the best aunt/cousin/etc ever and the other adults will be glad that someone’s out there watching them. By clearing the plates and starting on the dishes, it limits your time at the table just sitting with an empty plate while everyone goes for seconds, so there’s less opportunity for others to comment on you only having one portion, and again, they focus on how good of a helper you are in letting your mother or the hostess have some much needed time at the table to relax.

Post # 3
Member
137 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Try to load up your plate with salad and other veggies, so it doesn’t look like you’re not eating. And eat your favorites in moderation! It’s one day, maybe count it as your cheat day?

Post # 4
Member
5207 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2013

lfranke:  Only put a tiny portion (like a tablespoon) of each kind of food on your plate. It’ll make it seem like you are partaking in the same amount of food as everyone else. Also you don’t have to drink beer. There’s something wrong if your family members are encouraging you to get drunk.

Post # 6
Member
42538 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

No one pushes the food down our throats. We are responsible for what we eat. You can have loads of salad, vegetables, plain turkey, have some pie without the crust. Watch out for the points in the beer. They can add up if you spend all day sipping. Alternate with water.

Bring your own snacks. Check out the fridege when you arrive and go grocery shopping if you need things like yougurt, fruit etc.

Post # 9
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

i’m in a similar position. i used to be 220, but i’m down now to around 139-142. my family assumes that because i eat well at all other times, that i should just binge it out on thanksgiving. what they fail to realize though is that i’m trying to build lean muscle and still cut some fat, therefore no i can’t just eat a big meal like that. not to mention that it makes me physically sick to eat shit or overeat after eating clean for a while. gives me tummy troubles. but when i don’t partake, all i hear is, “oh come on, live a little!” or “you’re so tiny, one day won’t hurt you!” but they don’t know how hard it is to pick up and go steadily forward AFTER that one day.

what i’ve had to do (and it’s hard but they will learn) is to change the subject after i answer honestly. “come one, you can have a little of this! live!” “no thank you, i don’t care for any. so how are your vacation plans coming?” “one day won’t hurt you!!” “thanks; as good as that casserole looks, i’m really stuffed after all those delicious veggies! did you make those aunt sheryl? they were fantastic! what’s your recipe?” 

and i’d probably skip the beer and go for wine. the bubbles will make you feel bloated, and if you’re just going to have 1, it’s going to be hot before you finish it. yuck.

Post # 10
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

lfranke:  I’ve been there! I’ve totally been there! Have you ever checked out Hungry Girl? I know you mentioned Weight Watchers, but Hungry Girl is pretty good for swapping out bad versions of things for low-cal versions of recipes. Maybe make a dish to bring and share and don’t even mention that it is healthy? Especially look at the Sides, Starters, and Snacks section. Good luck!

Here: http://www.hungry-girl.com/recipes

ETA: Never noticed this, but all of the recipes have the PointsPlus value on them, hope that helps! 🙂

 

Post # 11
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

ClassicCorvette:  that’s what i’m doing next week; i’m bringing a slimmed down dessert and not telling anyone it’s a healthier item! no one would touch it if they knew, so i’m going to see what the reviews my family gives are like after they unknowingly try it. then, i  can’t wait to see their faces when they realize i tricked them, lol.

Post # 12
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

MrsHalpert:  We’re so sneaky! I hope your dessert is a success! 🙂

Post # 13
Member
506 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Will people really pay that much attention to what you’re eating/drinking? I can’t imagine anyone taking note of that in my family. They’re all too busy focusing on their own eating/drinking to care what someone else is doing. Maybe you’re overthinking.

Post # 14
Member
1158 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

lfranke:  I think it’s sad that somehow it’s become socially acceptable to comment in a negative way regarding the food on someone else’s plate. It’s no one’s business but yours.

I’ve dealt with this for years on a daily basis because I eat healthy, actually just don’t really like sugary things, and don’t gorge myself on stuff i do like. For some reason this just flabbergasts many people from family to coworkers to complete strangers and people have all kinds of things to say about my personal choices that don’t affect them at all.

I’ve found that some of the best responses are those that shut down further questioning.for example, regarding the small portion sizes you mentioned:

Comment: “You barely ate/are eating anything!” or “You didn’t/aren’t eat(ing) enough” or “Are you starving yourself?”

Response: “I just don’t eat any more as soon as I feel full! It was great and I feel satisfied now OR This is just enough to make me feel satisfied. [Insert subject change]”

This way, it makes no sense to continue with “well arent you hungry!!” or “you need more!!” comments and establishes that you are enjoying yourself just as much as anyone else who IS overeating. Deep down people usually know when they are eating portion sizes that are more than they really need, so usually this sort of makes people pause. Usually the motivation behind people pushing “love” food on you is because they want you to enjoy as much as they are — if you say youre just as happy with your smaller portions as they are with their large ones, then what more can they say without looking silly?

You can also say this is just your first round (and then just not ever go back for seconds).

As for having a hard time watching other indulge when you can’t, something i have done for years is to eat healthy snacks throughout the day leading up to a big tempting meal, and then by the time it comes, im not all that hungry and it’s easy to enjoy in moderation. You can still enjoy your favorite foods, you just wont need a ton of each one to get the same effect. this way, you ARE in control of the menu.

At the end of the day you just have to make this about you and what you want for yourself, which is a healthy life, looking awesome and being free of the numerous health problems that are likely to befall chronic overeaters later on. When you look at it from that perspective, dealing with annoying comments and exerting some self control in a tempting situation is a tiny price to pay!

Post # 15
Member
13021 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I don’t really see the problem except for having to watch everyone indulge while you maintain control.  Who cares what anyone says about eating.  My mom and I get comments like “you’re so small, you can eat more” all the time when we say we dont want to eat something cause it’s unhealthy or when we go out to eat and share a dish or only eat half.  Our response is always the same – “this is WHY we are so small and we want to stay that way!”  If you have a goal, go for it, they can eat and be whatever size they want to be.  You don’t impose your eating habits on them, tell them to return the favor and just shut up.

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