(Closed) Weird feelings?!?!

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
2532 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I dont think you should talk about this with your FI. Honestly I would suggest seeing a counselor/therapist. Just so that you have a non-biased person to help you sort through this emotional situation. I can understand what you are going through to some extent. My HS sweetheart and I dated for 3.5 years. I was VERY close with his mom. I ran into her at the grocery store about a year ago. I wanted to befriend her but knew that it wasnt a good idea. Occasionally Ill miss the bond that I had with his family, but then I remember that the reason I had that bond was because I spent almost every night in high school over at his house. And then I remind myself that I have many years to build upon the relationships with my Future In Laws. I hope you can work through these feelings! Good luck and im sorry you are going through this!

Post # 4
Member
572 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Have you mourned your (lack of) relationship with your IL’s?  You are essentially experiencing a loss.

There is this show that we watch together every so often and it makes me sad when I see the relationship between the MIL and wife.  I can’t think of what it is called but I’ll think “DH do you not see how the relationship could be, or should be”, “DH, see how that MIL is, that is how they are supposed to be: nice” or “If your mom was like this, everything would be so much better.”  I do get sad, especially when you hear the MIL speak so highly of their FDIL and how her son is lucky to get her. 

The other night on Family Matters, there is this family blanket that gets passed down to the oldest daughter.  The wife said “But you don’t have any daughters” and the mom said some touching words and gave it to Harriet.  My thoughts? Yep, I’ll never experience that 🙁

OTOH, they are just pictures you are seeing.  They may just be making nice for the camera and not really picture perfect in real life, you know?

I think if you do talk to your FI, or if he asks and you feel like telling him, just say that you’ve been a little down by seeing others good elationships with their IL’s and it makes you sad because you don’t have that.

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