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Law student opinions needed!

Weird, jealous stares???

posted 2 years ago in Rings
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    LittleAudrey    August 4, 2012   Bahrain/Iowa

    Hola bees:

     

    I live in the midwest, where the average stone size is probably between .5 and .75 carats. I received a lovely one carat moissanite ring, and everyone assumes its a diamond.

    I've noticed that sometimes other women notice my ring and give me a strange look. It just happened today. It makes me feel like they're judging me for being pretty young with what they presume is a very expensive ring. (Luckily it wasn't!)

    This happens a lot in indoor lighting because Moissanites sparkle like a rainbow under flourescent lights. This might be further aggravated by the fact that I'm a teacher and that other women in my profession are wondering how I'm able to afford such a ring. I hate the feeling like they're judging me and my fiance's income or spending choices. I don't want to sound like I'm complaining- I'm just uncomfortable and don't know what I should do.

    Has this ever happened to you? Sometimes I feel awkward when people stare at my ring and don't quite know how to handle it. And I wonder what would have happened if we would have gone with a 2 carat ring !!

    What do you think, bees?

     
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    lilyfaith    June 23, 2012   Lakeview, Chicago

    Hmm, people have been staring at my ring, but I assumed it's because I'm young and look even younger. It's a 1 ct princess cut diamond, but I've seen so many flashier rings that I think that 1 ct would be a weird size to judge? 

     
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    HoneyBear    March 17, 2012   Texas/ Isla Mujeres

    Thats funny, this actually happened to me today. I had to go down to the community college to take a test that they offer at their assessment center. While I was in there I could see this girl staring at my ring from the corner of my eye. I'm 23 but I still look pretty young, and its not like my ring is huge or anything! lol its a 1 carat emerald cut diamond. 

    I didnt really mind it though because no one really knows your story, just take pleasure in the fact that you have a beautiful ring!

     
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    laural    September 24, 2011   Louisiana

    I am 23 and got engaged at 22 and my ring is 2.78 carat center diamond and for the entire ring it has 3.14 carats.

    I have had HORRIBLE stares and questions. Everything from did he borrow money for it (no - and its not your business!) to is it real (yes!) to well you probably got a big ring because it has flaws (um NO - there are no inclusions and it has one of the highest color rankings!).

    A lot of times what I do is look at the person looking at my ring and make it obvious that I saw them staring and say something like - my FI has such good taste or wedding planning is so much fun! Just come up with a line that clearly says I saw you and I am not going to let you bring me down!

     
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    Emshaw    July 31, 2010  

    I have a very large ring (10.5 ct center stone) though it's not a diamond. I've never had any stares but when people notice it they often ask if it's real.

    I say don't worry about it! Just feel blessed that you have a lovely ring and FI.

     
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    HoneyBear    March 17, 2012   Texas/ Isla Mujeres

    @laural- can we see a pic of that ring???? it sounds amazing, a little ring porn never hurt anyone lol

     
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    LittleAudrey    August 4, 2012   Bahrain/Iowa

    I think part of it might be that people tell me I look really young. Maybe people don't expect someone my age to be engaged?

     
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    Cricket1524    September 4, 2010   Burbank, CA

    eh try living in Los Angeles, they'll look at you weird if you're ring is smaller than 3 carats! lol . . . Just be happy and enjoy it, try and brush it off as awkward as it can be sometimes. Woman can act strange about all sorts of things but the other thing to remember is this, just cuz someone is staring doesn't mean its not in admiration. I am guilty of this myself. I'll look at a girls dress or shoes or purse and realize I'm lost in thought then realize she's looking at me like what's your deal? I quickly voice my thought and compliment and that usually explains the whole thing but some people are really shy. Ya never know what people are thinking and I know personally I always think people are thinking negatively instead of positively.

     
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    Ms. Caniche    September 18, 2010   Orange County, CA

    Where I live it es very common to see large...large rings.  My godmothers ring is a total of 9 karats =0

    My center stone is a 3.02 and I don't think I have had jealous looks....but I have been stopped in the middle of a restaurant for someone to talk to me about it.  They are always very nice an complementary.

    Rock your ring with confidence.  And ignore any jealous people because that is what they are, jealous.

     
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    Helper bee
    jennybirdy    June 5, 2010   St. Louis, MO

    I sometimes get the looks too. I'm pretty sure that it's because I look young.  I'm pushing 30, but probably look 21ish and my ring sparkles quite a bit, which I think can be pretty eye catching.  Like the other bees said, just enjoy the fact that you have a gorgeous ring that was picked out just for you!!  Your FI would probably love to hear that your ring is getting attention :)

     
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    CorgiTales    February 1, 2011  

    I don't think I've ever noticed that. My center stone is 1 ct and I live in the midwest. I feel like most younger people around here have similar rings... although i guess i spend most of my time with professional types who have a bit more money than average. 

     
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    Bella13    May 13, 2009   Honolulu, Hawaii

    Yeah, when I first got engaged I was working at a bank and I would get comments ALLLL day long like "WOW that's big. He must really love you"

    My ring has a 1ct center stone, but we didn't break the bank to get it or anything and I in no way base his amount of love on the size of my ring.

    People have no tact sometimes. I even had one guy say "Oh no. Please don't tell me you're engaged" and when I said yes he said "Good luck with that!" In a not so pleasant tone.

     
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    zippylef    October 30, 2010   Norfolk, UK

    I don't think I've ever had that happen either, I'm in the Midwest too. I do get lots of compliments on it but I the only jealousy I get is from this one random, desperate single girl I work with. She's the one that always wants to try it on.... I have a 1ct round brilliant solitaire.

     
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    Bumble bee
    verosara    March 27, 2010   LA, California

    Funny thing one day at work before a meeting one of my collegues said to me "that's a lot of love on your finger!" and I didn't know what to say, was that a compliment?  Was he judging me or the FH?  So I replied with a "yes, I am blessed with a lot of love," so rock it girl!  I look at it and do think about how lucky and in love I am with my hubby to be. 

     
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    laural    September 24, 2011   Louisiana

    Ring Porn as per request:

     

    This is actually a really bad picture of it - I took the picture with the ring on the baseboard in my bathroom  after reading the tutorial and totally did not clean it before hand.

    Attachments

    1. Weird, jealous stares??? :  wedding Img RING.jpg (29.9 KB, 41 downloads) 2 years old
     
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    laural    September 24, 2011   Louisiana

    the center diamond is actually clear it just happens to have a nice layer of make up from my fingers on it.

     

     
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    jackie-o    October 31, 2010   Seattle, WA

    @jennybirdy - - I too am 30 but truly look between 20-22.  I got pulled over a few months back and the officer asked if I was late for class - my reply was "yes 9 yrs late"  he was shocked and let me off. I think he let me off b/c of his shock, HAHAHHAHAHHAHAH

    OP reply - - - darling enjoy it!  Honestly, like the girls have said make a comment letting them know you see them - I can't wait to be married....etc....

     
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    Helper bee
    jslsbride62610    June 2010  

    laural- No need to explain!  It's beautiful!

     

    I got engaged at 18 w a 3 stone, center stone .73 ct.

    I didn't get too many stares then (although I did get a few esp for being so young, although I didn't even look 18, I did look young)

    I'm 20 now and I have a 1 ct (upgraded by my fiance) center stone and a different setting.  We traded in and paid off the balance over a year (long engagement) and NOW I get some stares.  I have this Verragio setting where it lets in more light through the sides and I've had some people tell me they don't believe it's one ct.

     
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    Helper bee
    hazel920    July 3, 2011   happy engagement land

    I was waiting at the counter to pick up my food at a local Japanese restaurant fiance & I go to a lot.

    Japanese lady: Nice ring? You engaged?

    Me: Yes

    JL: Pretty? How many carats?  How much he buy it for?

    Me: Excuse me? (thinking: It's none of your business.)

    JL: Yeah, he show you how much he love you if you have big diamond.

    Me: Um.... (thinking: How the hell do I get out of this without being rude?)

    **JL actually called fiance over who was at the table minding his own business.

    JL: Ahh, you did good job, young man. I bet lots of money, yes? 

    Fiance: (Confused look)

    JL: Now you got to learn speak Japanese so her dad approve, yes? Asian family not really like when daughter marry non-Asian.  (My fiance's white.  I'm Filipino but I guess she assumed I was Japanese since I always went there.  My family is definitely ok with us marrying "non-Asians".  LOL.  Fiance was too shocked to say anything.)

    Fiance: Oh, sure.  I already studied Japanese in college. (He did!)

    Weird. 

     
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    jingle96    May 28, 2010   DW in ARUBA/livin' in VA

    @ Hazel:  Crazy story!  Similiar stiry happened to me @ a Chinese owned dry cleaning store.  Her comment was "How many carats?"  Followed by "he must really love you!"

    I know how you feel about the ring stare, I don't think people are jealous of mine they might just judge me.  I have a 3 carat ring and people may think that the fi may have tons of money, but little do they know, he only had to pay for the setting, because the actual center diamond was his mother's (her diamond from her e ring 26 yrs ago!).  Sometimes I do get a little shy about wearing it at work (I work in a hospital) and sometimes I might turn it in my palm or hide my hand so patients don't see it.  I know might sound weird, but I feel bad flaunting it (don't get me wrong, I LOVE MY RING)!

     
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    laural    September 24, 2011   Louisiana

    @jsls - show us your ring! I honestly have no idea what a Verragio is but it sounds so unique!

     
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    Ms. Caniche    September 18, 2010   Orange County, CA

    HAHA... for the first 3 months after we got engaged my nail lady (who I love)  would not stop... How big your ring???  It was expensive????  It very nice ring.

    She crackes me up, but I can see how it would be strange hearing that from a total stranger... awkward...

     

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