- 8 years ago
- Wedding: June 2010
I have so much going on in my mind right now that I’d like to discuss with the hive and see if anyone else understands so I will try to write this post in a way that’s not all over the place. lol
Ok – so technically our wedding isn’t until June. And OMG it’s soooo close to being the year 2010 it’s scarey!!!! We’ve been “engaged” now for a year and a half and I really did want a long engagement…although legally we do have that piece of paper that claims us as husband and wife.
Thing is – I can not WAIT to shout out to the world I’M MARRIED!!!! YES ME!!!! I turned 30 years old in August so technically – as far as most people we know will think – I will be a 30 year old bride…however we did become legal a few months before my 30th birthday due to indurance reasons as my husband needed back surgery. 🙂
Some days I still thank God that I have found such an incredible man to spend the rest of my life with – but I also think back to those lonely days of my 20’s when I dated around (usually very short time periods) always trying to find the right one…honestly up until DH, the longest relationship I actually had during my 20’s was 2 freakin’ months!!! And the guy left me for his cocaine habit…and before that I did date my high school boyfriend during high school for 8 months but that doesn’t really count…I also lived with a “friend with benefits” for about a year – and while we had a lot of fun and he was a good FRIEND that’s all he was – just a friend – absolutely NO emotional attachment whatsoever.
There were times when I was in my 20’s and I guess you could say I spent most of my 20’s really trying to “find myself” and figure out what I wanted to do with my life – but there were so many lonely nights when I honestly thought “no one will ever marry me – I’ll be alone forever…” I just didn’t really know how to BE a girlfriend, let alone a wife – as I’d never BEEN one (a girlfriend that is)…
And when Mr. JuneBride came into my life I was so sick and tired of being hurt that he was the ONE guy I actually *somewhat* took my time with and really tried to be patient…which in my world of past relationships i really DID take my time with him…we didn’t sleep together for at least a month and didn’t move in together till after the 4 month mark! haha! I know some people would look at that like “um you call that taking your time?” but for ME – yes that was TOTALLY “taking my time!”
I also wanted a long engagement because I’d always said to myself that if I truly find someone who wants to be with me for the rest of my life then he can deal with a 2 year engagement because I want to make SURE he wants to be with me…course again – legally we got hitched after only about 9 months of being engaged – but we’d already bought a house and had 2 babies (a black pug and a golden retreiver/lab mix)…and he absolutely HAD to have back surgery as he has scoliosis and 2 metal rods in his back and one was starting to poke out of his skin at the top of his spine (yup ew I know).
But anywhoo – the point of this post is there are still days when I stop and seriously thank God for all that he has given me because that lonely girl who used to be inside my skin is still in my head and can NOT believe “someone actually wants to be my husband and WANTS me to be his wife…AND he actually wants me to be the mother of his children too!!!!” Plus he’s got a great job – great morals – AND he’s NEVER done drugs! (this was actually a question I asked mr. junebride the first night we met as it would have been a deal breaker! lol)
Is there anyone else out there in ‘bee land who – like me – spent most of their 20’s lonely – always trying to find “the one” only to find yourself more miserable and lonely, thinking they’d NEVER find “him”? I mean it – there’s not a day that goes by that I don’t say a little prayer thanking God for bringing mr. junebride into my life – and it’s been over 3 years now! 😀
Yeah – while we may already be legal – my wedding day will be the day I get to shout out to the world – YUP I’M MARRIED!!! ME!!!!!!